For those of you who don’t know, yesterday Fox aired a four hour telecast of Jessica Simpson sitting in a press box, that was inter-cut every few minutes with scenes from the Cowboys-Eagles game.

Jessica attended the game to watch her new boyfriend, Quarterback Tony Romo, have the worst game of his entire career, throwing 3 interceptions in the Cowboys 10-6 loss to the underdog Philadelphia Eagles.

I watched this game. Tony Romo looked incredibly tired the whole game. And not, “I helped my buddy move yesterday” tired. More like “I had nasty ass sex in an equipment room behind the stands three minutes before I walked on to the field to play,” tired. Look, I get it Tony. You used to be a back up and you had to work for hot chicks. Now you’re the starter on one of the best teams in football and you can’t walk ten feet without hearing “Is that Tony Romo? I want to bang him then feed him strips of bacon while one of my hot friends gives him a naked, full-body massage.” But it’s Jessica Simpson. She was married to Nick Lachey which means she’s used to sleeping with guys that have no talent. On the flip side, Dallas Cowboy fans will castrate you if you don’t play well because you got a tight asshole due to your girlfriend being in the stands. Leave her at home and plop her in front of a tivo-ed game where you threw for five touchdowns on Thanksgiving. She won’t know the difference.

---

This entry was posted on Monday, December 17th, 2007 at 11:39 am and is filed under News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.