When I heard Eliot Spitzer paid $4,100 dollars an hour for his hooker, I thought that was a lot of money to pay for a hooker. You could buy a 2002 Hyundai Accent for that much. Although I think it’s probably more socially acceptable to pay for a hooker than to drive an ’02 Hyundai. Anyway, now there’s a new girl on the market, but she’s way pricier. Usmagazine.com reports:
A man from the U.K. placed a winning eBay bid of $40,100 to join her at the L.A. premiere of He’s Just Not That Into You this June.
I was shocked when I first heard about this, but $40,000?! I hope to God he at least does the penis in the popcorn bag trick. Alright, these prices are getting out of control. This is like when A-Rod got $250 million dollars from the Texas Ragners. It just threw shit out of whack. So, once and for all, I'm going to set prices for this kind of stuff. See the chart below, I think you'll find it hopeful.
All the prices seem fine for the services rendered. With the exception of the common whore. I'll skip that catagory but I'll sign up for the rest. Who do I make the check out to and how soon can I get the schedule lined up?
I would much rather put it in Alba's no no hole, probably after she drops that filthy beast of a child out of her. But who am I to be picky. However Sco Jo has some damn fine perkies (boobs).
The starbucks biotch would smell like stale coffee beans and bore me with factoids about coffee.....Spitzers cock cushion is for me right up the ole' turd cutter
What I dont get is that the Spritzer call girl wasnt all that hot. And she was only about a grand an hour and Spitzer pays $4300? What the f-k was he doing that long when he could have banged her silly 8 times for half an hour and still had some money left over for a tip. WTF? Anyway, his wife looks like a crusty, boring, uptight, no-good-in-bed, nagging ass prude so I dont blame him ONE BIT for getting some extra action. Its probably why he was able to stay with her as long as he has (that, and it was cheaper to blow 80K on hookers than what it would cost to get rid of her with a divorce).
That's right dork, donate less...less money, means less successful rejects making it. Such as yourself. Your in the "Those-without-a-sense-of-humor" section of my To-Be-Deleted program for the betterment of this hellhole you call earth...
I'm trying to clean this fucking planet up, and your complaining?
You should be feeling lucky that your section is 3rd on the list for elimination. Keep it up and I'll bump you up to first.
God.
P.S. You can lower your place in line by walking around without panties all day. I absolutely love that.
P.P.S. Just douche first; the tuna stinks to high heaven.
If I give a girl 1,000 Dollars, she better be going to BestBuy and buying me a big screen tv with it. that way i can watch life sized porn and not care that the girl giving me head is beastly looking :x
(20 Comments)
Twitter
March 13th, 2008 at 07:43 pm
One the Starbucks's chick should be free across the board. Imaging trying to have anal sex with her and she rips a coffee fart; fuck that dude.
Also I was curious as to why J.Alba is cheaper than Scarlett J.; I'm perplexed here.
March 13th, 2008 at 07:44 pm
One the Starbucks's chick should be free across the board. Imaging trying to have anal sex with her and she rips a coffee fart; fuck that dude.
Two, I'm curious as to why J.Alba is cheaper than Scarlett J.; I'm really perplexed here.
March 13th, 2008 at 08:25 pm
To me, anal sex is "regular sex," so I guess these are bargain basement prices. I dig it.
March 13th, 2008 at 08:34 pm
i dont like anal anyway whoppiiee
March 13th, 2008 at 09:43 pm
If I had a spare 40k laying around, I would have definitely paid for a movie date with Scarlett.
March 13th, 2008 at 09:55 pm
I'll take the Scarlett Johandjob for $2,000 please...
www.bannedinhollywood.com
March 13th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
All the prices seem fine for the services rendered. With the exception of the common whore. I'll skip that catagory but I'll sign up for the rest. Who do I make the check out to and how soon can I get the schedule lined up?
March 13th, 2008 at 11:55 pm
I would much rather put it in Alba's no no hole, probably after she drops that filthy beast of a child out of her. But who am I to be picky. However Sco Jo has some damn fine perkies (boobs).
March 14th, 2008 at 01:14 am
I would pay 10,982,214.92 !!
March 14th, 2008 at 04:07 am
Dude, bitch is hot, but, HELL NO there is NOTHING a biatch can do for me thats worth more than $50
March 14th, 2008 at 05:03 am
I wouldn't waste a penny on any of them cause their ugly. Why waste money on someone crap as those?
March 14th, 2008 at 05:27 am
The starbucks biotch would smell like stale coffee beans and bore me with factoids about coffee.....Spitzers cock cushion is for me right up the ole' turd cutter
March 14th, 2008 at 08:57 am
What I dont get is that the Spritzer call girl wasnt all that hot. And she was only about a grand an hour and Spitzer pays $4300? What the f-k was he doing that long when he could have banged her silly 8 times for half an hour and still had some money left over for a tip. WTF? Anyway, his wife looks like a crusty, boring, uptight, no-good-in-bed, nagging ass prude so I dont blame him ONE BIT for getting some extra action. Its probably why he was able to stay with her as long as he has (that, and it was cheaper to blow 80K on hookers than what it would cost to get rid of her with a divorce).
March 14th, 2008 at 12:07 pm
NO.
March 14th, 2008 at 01:18 pm
Don't you think Spitzer's girl has some skill? If her going rate is $4,100 an hour, it's probably worth it.
March 14th, 2008 at 03:05 pm
The $40,100 went towards charity, asshole. You're trying to tell people to donate less.
February 12th, 2009 at 01:58 pm
That's right dork, donate less...less money, means less successful rejects making it. Such as yourself. Your in the "Those-without-a-sense-of-humor" section of my To-Be-Deleted program for the betterment of this hellhole you call earth...
I'm trying to clean this fucking planet up, and your complaining?
You should be feeling lucky that your section is 3rd on the list for elimination. Keep it up and I'll bump you up to first.
God.
P.S. You can lower your place in line by walking around without panties all day. I absolutely love that.
P.P.S. Just douche first; the tuna stinks to high heaven.
March 15th, 2008 at 02:00 am
Actually I retract my last comment. I saw some cute barista today and im going with the $135 blow jo fo sho.
www.bannedinhollywood.com
March 16th, 2008 at 03:25 am
If I give a girl 1,000 Dollars, she better be going to BestBuy and buying me a big screen tv with it. that way i can watch life sized porn and not care that the girl giving me head is beastly looking :x