The 11 Manliest Cocktails In The World
You wouldn’t be caught dead drinking a cosmo, but all your friends will be drinking these at your funeral.
11. Irish Car Bomb
Why is it manly?: What’s manlier than going mano-a-beero with a pint of the world’s thickest stout mixed with a shot of whiskey? Knowing that if you don’t chug it fast enough, you’ll be downing chunks of curdled Bailey’s cream.
Recipe:
3/4 pint Guinness stout
1/2 shot Bailey’s Irish cream
1/2 shot Jameson Irish whiskey
10. Kentucky Tea
Why is it manly:? You can get shot in the face by an Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms federal agent just for making this cocktail.
Recipe:
1 mason jar halfway full of moonshine
Fill the jar with branch water
9. Rusty Nail
Why is it manly?: I can’t put my finger on exactly why, but there’s something oddly macho about asking your girlfriend if she would like to sip on your Rusty Nail.
Recipe:
¾ oz. scotch
¼ oz. Drambuie
8. Snake Bite
Why is it manly?: Anytime a drink is compared to a snake sinking its fangs into you and depositing venom in your bloodstream, chances are, it’s probably pretty stiff. Basically it’s straight up Yukon Jack, which has been known to make balls hairy. The only reason there’s a dash of lime juice is so you won’t get scurvy.
Recipe:
2 oz Yukon Jack liqueur
1 dash Lime juice
7. Jagerade
Why is it manly?: To be honest, I don’t know if this is manly or just gross. Either way, a man can never get enough electrolytes.
Recipe:
8 oz chilled Gatorade energy drink
4 oz Jagermeister herbal liqueur
6. Gin and Juice
Why is it manly?: Snoop Dogg likes to drink this when there are bitches in his living room gettin’ it on until six o’clock in the morning, so that has to be worth something. Gin and juice was also the morning cocktail of soldiers and officers in WWII. That’s right, this is what you drank right before you killed a bunch of Nazis. You can’t say that about Malibu and pineapple.
Recipe:
2 1/2 ounces Gin.
1 oz. orange juice.
Equal parts mind on your money and money on your mind
5. Nuclear Waste
Why is it manly?: This is the only thing Keith Richards drinks now. According to the man himself, “”Whiskey wasn’t agreeing with me anymore. The old body couldn’t take it. Brandy is a killer, and wine is best with food, so somehow I settled on this. Plenty of ice. Lovely.” If it’s good enough for Mr. Richards, it’s good enough for this list.
Recipe:
2 oz. premium vodka
1 oz. Sunkist or any orange soda
Plenty of ice
4. Tequila Sunrise
Why is it manly?:First off, it’s a breakfast cocktail. And secondly, “2 measures tequila” is short for, “as much tequila as your glass will hold.” It may look a little fruity but it’s about as tropical as a back alley in Tijuana.
Recipe:
2 measures Tequila
Orange juice
2 dashes Grenadine
3. The Original Sazerac
What makes it manly?: This cocktail takes the classic New Orleans recipe and adds—what else—a nice, healthy addition of Absinthe. Because if huffing rye whiskey doesn’t make you a man, mixing it with mythical psychadelic liquor that tastes like cough syrup will make sure everyone knows you have a penis.
Recipe:
1 tsp Sugar
1-1/2 oz Rye whiskey
1 Dash Herbsaint, Pernod or Absinthe (to coat the glass)
2 dashes Peychaud bitters
2 dashes Angostura bitters
1 Lemon peel twist
2. Martini
Why is it manly?: Well, it’s pretty much straight alcohol, with just enough vermouth to remind you that you’re not drinking disinfectant. Plus, James Bond drinks it, and he bangs lots of chicks and beats the crap out of dudes with names that describe a hideous disfigurement they have that also provides them with some sort of physical superiority.
Recipe:
2 1/2 oz Gin
1 1/2 tsp Dry Vermouth
1 Olive
1. Manhattan:
Why is it manly: You may say “it’s got a cherry, nothing with a cherry is manly.” Well, nibble on this: It’s notorious for being the favorite drink of the Italian Mafia, who are notorious for killing people. I’m not saying killing somebody makes you a man, but it’s probably not the best idea to call someone who just threw someone off a bridge a “cherry drinking pansy.”
Recipe:
*3/4 oz Sweet Vermouth
2 1/2 oz Rye whiskey
dash Angostura bitters
1 Maraschino cherry
Tags: alcohol, booze, cocktails, manliest, spirits
April 15th, 2008 at 11:18 am
Boooo, terrible list.
Yo quiero holy taco, but I no like-o this listo.
April 15th, 2008 at 11:41 am
I like the list. It’s my personal goal to drink rusty nails exclusively.
April 15th, 2008 at 12:57 pm
# “The Joel Says:
April 15th, 2008 at 11:41 am
I like the list. It’s my personal goal to drink rusty nails exclusively.”
And prolly give your boyfriend rusty trombones after! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
April 15th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
TERRIBLE list!, Manhattan!?! Tequila sunrise!?!?! WTF This list should be called what to drink to impress your girlfriends friends. Or How to score front row seats at the pride parade.
April 15th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
I thought a Snake Bite was just a pint of Harp ale & hard cider? Thats what i’m served whenever I order one at least…
April 15th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
There is a shot that my bartender and I developed that is pretty good. It’s called a mad cow.
It’s a shot of 151, with a half a shot of kaluha and a half a shot of creme(half and half). what do you call a half a shot of half and half? just call it a shot of half i guess.
The creme keeps the 151 from burning through your larynx and the shots are strong.
April 15th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
In england, snakebite is 1/2 lager, 1/2 cider, usually with a shot of blackcurrant
cordial.
Apart from that, awesome list!
April 15th, 2008 at 4:35 pm
what about the zombie? 3 oz 151 rum,2 oz dark rum,2 oz light rum,8 oz cherry brandy
April 15th, 2008 at 4:56 pm
Christ on a crutch! How about just plain whiskey neat or on the rocks?
April 15th, 2008 at 5:21 pm
mobsters are not manly. Sure, they kill people and all, but they wear queer ass clothes and cheesy jewelry
April 15th, 2008 at 7:46 pm
It’s only manly to people who gell their hair into a mohawk, with little bleached ends at the tips. They would be wearing a “retro” smoking jacket and jeans. Sipping their cocktails slow enough so they would be able to Guaqmire all the drunk chicks.
April 15th, 2008 at 10:09 pm
I usually just drink Jack straight but since I got a gift of absinthe recently I might try that number 7
April 16th, 2008 at 5:17 am
where is the white russian . the dude drinks it man come on
April 16th, 2008 at 6:15 am
Snake bite, here in the UK its half cider half beer with a shot of grenadine you pansies.
April 16th, 2008 at 7:27 am
At first I thought the list was lame. But then I realised that it’s coctails and didn’t really care. Real men drink thier alchohol straight up and fast. The essence of a true power drinker.
April 16th, 2008 at 8:13 am
Irish Truck Bomb–a buddy of mine was in NYC, on a pub crawl. He was challenged to finish a Truck Bomb, which is the same as a car bomb, but bigger:
-1/2 pitcher of Guiness
-1/2 highball of Jameson
-1/2 highball of Baileys
Three Wisemen:
-1/3 Johnny Walker (red or black)
-1/3 Jim Beam
-1/3 Jack Daniels
rocks or neat (I’d only suggest neat if you’re trying to make your 21 yr. old friend puke)
April 16th, 2008 at 8:15 am
Cheers on the Nuclear Waste. Look at his face… fantastic drinkin’ face.
Manhattan is also good bc it’s got the alkyhol of the martini, with a cherry to ensnare a laydee. That’s how i do it, BITCHES.
April 16th, 2008 at 8:51 am
I used to drink Jack Daniels and nothing else. Then I started having a hard time getting out of bed everyday. I didn’t think much of it until my life started becoming much more difficult than it used to be. I couldn’t understand what was going on. Then I had a bright idea and switched to Johnny Walker Black. I thought that if I switched I’d start feeling better. I did for a while, but I think that was just the placebo thing-a-ma-jig. I got to a point where I really didn’t care about much. A friend of my told me about AA. I know, I know. Sounds like a cop-out. But if you think drinking makes you a man, see how much stuff you’ve got- walk into an AA meeting and tell everyone in the room that you’re an Alkie! That takes real guts. I never looked back. I put my life back together and, you wouldn’t believe it- No more hangovers- PRICELESS!
April 16th, 2008 at 9:04 am
How about the 4 Horsemen went hunting……Jim, Jack, Jose, Captain with a dash of Wild Turkey. Even when you’re fucked up, it’s hard to keep this one down.
April 16th, 2008 at 9:14 am
omg this list turned out good, then ended with some poon drinks. this has to be a joke right?????? i dont care if your martini glass is filled with wild turkey, and coke. if your dude and your holding a martini glass thats universal sign language for i like to Hold to COCK.
1.) AMF(adios mother fucker)
2.) wild turkey and coke
3.) 151 anything
4.) jack on the rocks
5.) tokyo ice tea
6.) zombie
7.) everclear cherry bomb
April 16th, 2008 at 11:09 am
A Shot of Jamison 12 year old Irish Whisky–This is the main reason the Irish don’t rule the world
April 16th, 2008 at 11:56 am
I am a bartender in Canada.
Here, a Snake Bite is a shot. It is half Tequila, Half Jack daniels.
April 16th, 2008 at 12:34 pm
The manlinest drink around is a Bear Fight, without questions.
Irish Car Bomb immediately followed by a Jagar Bomb. Grizzley Bear v. Panda.
Whoever wins. You lose.
April 17th, 2008 at 12:39 am
you left out the pussy express. that drink is good got me hell wasted one friday night
April 17th, 2008 at 7:01 am
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April 17th, 2008 at 9:59 am
Try this one, its called a mad apache in a double shot glass
1oz 151 & 1oz hot damn (100 proof)
April 17th, 2008 at 10:28 am
um..boilermaker?
April 17th, 2008 at 11:26 am
Still I think nothing hits harder than what my friend and I call a gorilla fart. Usually only drunk at the end of the night to make sure that you get wasted at last call.
1 oz. diesel (or everclear… anything 190+)
1 oz. Wild Turkey
And for the guys who want to chase that with something a little nicer the Pigeon fart
1 oz. 151
1 oz bailey’s
one after the other… guaranty’s a good time
April 17th, 2008 at 1:55 pm
There’s a difference between a Snake Bite (above mentioned cocktail) and a Snakebite (the 1/2 pint lager, 1/2 pint cider popular with the Brits). Personally, I like em both.
April 17th, 2008 at 1:55 pm
Im gonna start this rant by saying I’m a bartender, The amount of alcohol in the drink or the proof of it doesn’t make you a man. People who order Adios M’F'ers and tokyo teas and kryptonites or straight shots of 151 are idiots. Anytime the word fart, piss, pussy or anything that sounds like a frat guy made it up while doing whip its or huffing paint out of a paper bag is not manly, it’s borderline retarded. A simple beer and a shot will do. I’m not 100% if a martini/manhattan are manly drinks but they are classics. Also, for crying out loud if you are a man do not order a lemon drop, chocolate cake, wet pussy, screaming orgasm or nuts and berries. I don’t care how delicious it might be. If you come into my bar and ask for that I will say one of two things, Hand over your man membership or did you make sure to wipe your flowery vagina after you got done peeing while sitting down. And yes snakebites are a mixed drink and a mixture of a lager and a cider.
April 17th, 2008 at 8:26 pm
Photoshopped.
April 18th, 2008 at 8:21 am
This list is for drinks and not shots.
I drink manhattan’s and gin martini’s almost exclusively, girl’s are always wondering what I’m drinking and then are sorry they asked when I give them a taste. I think that’s the best manly test there is.
April 18th, 2008 at 10:50 am
I love this list. I get at least 4 of those drinks off the list when i frequent Rage in West Hollywood. But if your drinkin 151 straight, that must make you a man. next time ill say hi
Ciao!
April 19th, 2008 at 1:37 am
I ‘m a bartender and I hate all these trendy drinks with “cool” names. When people tell me to make them something good I them a shot of Crown, quickly swipe the money and move to the next person. It’s good enough for me enjoy.
April 19th, 2008 at 8:49 am
What about the Duckfart???? The manlyist of all!!!!!
April 19th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
A drunk is a drunk is a drunk. It doesn’t matter what brand of alcohol they drink. If they don’t end up stinking with their head in a toilet bowl today, they may end up in the drunk ward in the not-to-distant future. And the funny thing about it is that most of the people in the drinking establishments won’t even remember their names. You can take THAT to the bank.
April 20th, 2008 at 6:16 am
What ever happened to keeping it simple a handle of Captain, Ice, a splash of coke for color. The list has a few good one’s, the rest is well only if you hang with the village people. Vodka help’s your eyesight too pick out a lady at 10 then look at her again at 2 Damn she’s fine.
Later
April 21st, 2008 at 10:14 pm
that list is so wrong…
as a bartender my list would be..
1) long island ice tea (it should be a pint glass filled with spirits with a dash of coke and lemon juice, i realise its incorrectly made but thats how i make em, and thats a mans drink)
2) gibson dry tequilatini (if its salt rimmed its even better, although its in a martini glass it should be drank in 2 to 3 sips so no one sees you walking around like a w@nker holding a martini glass)
3) Blitzer (beer and vodka, nuff said. blitzers can also use whiskey instead of vodka)
4) Rusty nail
5) battery acid (black sambuca, tequila and tabasco, try one and you will know why)
6)la’ gre’n orang’e (absinthe and orange juice, anyone gives you $hit that you are drinking a womans drink tell them to go frack themselfs, its french (well not really))
7) Jager bomb (yagermeister and redbull, its a nicer jageraide)
April 22nd, 2008 at 5:42 pm
A Yager bomb will fuyoup fast
Vodka strait-up martini’s…has no hang over!
try it see for your self
But a nice have people over drink
1 part Southern Comfort
1 part Vodka
1 can frozen lime aide mix, it’s like lemon aide
1 part water
Use lime aide can for the “one part thing”
1 can 7up
ice
Put in blinder tell all most full to top
Punch a button
BEST COOLER EVER
and yes I’m gay and have been running Bar’s for over20 years
April 22nd, 2008 at 8:27 pm
How about the old classic called Lousiana Lemonade
1 oz. Southern Comfort
1. oz bottom shelf Vodka
4 oz. Warm cat urine.
Serve over ice with a sprig of Mint.
April 22nd, 2008 at 10:30 pm
My drink’s the Rob Roy… Manhattan with scotch instead of rye, cause I like scotch better. Tastes good and classy as fuck.
April 22nd, 2008 at 10:48 pm
This list was awful. Any real man knows that using a bucket full of sang som to wash down some satanically hot thai curry is what real men drink.
April 22nd, 2008 at 10:51 pm
I live on a street named Rusty Nail, that’s bad @$$. I’ll drink to that!
April 22nd, 2008 at 10:56 pm
I have no idea where your idea of “manly” lies, but most men I know wouldn’t know those drinks you posted…
A Long Island Ice Tea might be the extent of a complex mixed drink. Followed by a Margarita or a Skip and Go Naked (pushing the extremes here)
The rest would be something pretty simple like a Bloody Mary, Gin and Tonic, Jack and Coke, or a Seven and Seven….
Otherwise you could expect orders of straight shots of whatever was on hand followed by the local beer of the area we were frequenting.
Wine was for wannabe pussies or officers.
However being from enlisted stock that’s done a bit of traveling throughout the world as an Army paratrooper and Ranger, you shouldn’t take my word for it…..
After all, a manly experience in most peoples eyes now days has nothing to do with what men from my generation thought manly at the time.
Maybe you meant “manly” by todays standards?
If so, I do apologize.
April 22nd, 2008 at 11:18 pm
the canadien freight train. (originally just ‘freight train’, adjusted when i brought it back from canada, and kudos to the bartender)
1/2oz jack daniels
1/2oz grand marnier
they didn’t have something we wanted, and after roughly 10 of these, i forgot what i wanted anyways.
April 22nd, 2008 at 11:20 pm
THE BRAWNDOZER:
1 part Brawndo: The Thirst Mutilator, 1 part vicious vodka, add one whole squeezed key-lime.
excellent.
April 22nd, 2008 at 11:42 pm
Anyone who thinks Guinness Draught is ‘the world’s thickest stout’ should never try to give advice on anything else alcohol related. I want to like this article but that wildly inaccurate phrase spoils it for me. Guinness = the Bud Lite of stout.
April 22nd, 2008 at 11:51 pm
What? no Boilermaker?
April 22nd, 2008 at 11:57 pm
How about the manliest is a guy who drinks whatever the fuck he wants and doesn’t give a shit if someone sees him holding a martini glass?
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:15 am
Drunk Russian vampire:
Find a drunk Russian who drank so much vodka he’s borderline dead- Rip off his head and drink his vodka flavored blood.
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:16 am
What, no Southern Comfort? That’s my shit! Straight outta the tap, just like Janis…
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:17 am
Chances are, if the bartender says “what the fuck is that?” when you place your order, you’re not getting a manly drink. That goes for 8 of the drinks on this list. Man drinks don’t have names.
Oh, and your #1, was created for a woman - Winston Churchill’s mother.
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:26 am
Wher’d they research to get this list, lesbian bars?
Where’s the Southern Comfort and ice?
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:29 am
You forgot the BURLY CANADIAN
MOLSONS
CROWN ROYAL
MAPLE SYRUP
DRINK IT AND SHUT UP.
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:35 am
stupid
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:43 am
You Redneck Vaginas,
The only real man’s drink is the Vikings drink and that is Danish aquavit. Or straight French Cognac or Russian Vodka (when you’re on vacation and penetrating those respective countries’ whores).
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:48 am
What the hell is wrong with an officer drinking wine, trooper?
I happen to prefer a well aged fucking Margaux when I eat my flank steak.
No way you made it through SERE with an attitude like that. Now drop and give me 20, cumdumpster
April 23rd, 2008 at 1:08 am
VIKING BURIAL:
Fill a small, wide glass !/2 full with ANY blue liquer (doesn’t matter, drink tastes like ass anyways), then fill a shot glass with any clear liquor and set it in the middle of the glass. set the shot of clear liquor on fire. it looks like a viking burial.
The drink sucks, but who cares, nothing mroe manly than a drink based after vikings and death.
April 23rd, 2008 at 1:09 am
good call great dane, i did try the viking burial once with Aquavit. and it actually got that taste of disgusting blue liqeur out of my mouth. Brutal.
April 23rd, 2008 at 1:15 am
Oh, here’s another real man drink:
take one glass, bottle, or can of beer (beer can be substituted for liquor) and then use some sort of tobacco.
Thats what I do, it goes well with my beard and chest hair.
Does anyone else drink their soco wth diet instead of regular coke? i just don’ like normal coke because sugary drinks are for little girls, and soco is borderline too sweet anyways.
I just like talking about alcohol.
April 23rd, 2008 at 1:22 am
BIGDICK “I used to drink Jack Daniels and nothing else. Then I started having a hard time getting out of bed everyday. I didn’t think much of it until my life started becoming much more difficult than it used to be. I couldn’t understand what was going on. Then I had a bright idea and switched to Johnny Walker Black. I thought that if I switched I’d start feeling better. I did for a while, but I think that was just the placebo thing-a-ma-jig. I got to a point where I really didn’t care about much. A friend of my told me about AA. I know, I know. Sounds like a cop-out. But if you think drinking makes you a man, see how much stuff you’ve got- walk into an AA meeting and tell everyone in the room that you’re an Alkie! That takes real guts. I never looked back. I put my life back together and, you wouldn’t believe it- No more hangovers- PRICELESS!”
Baby couldn’t handle his drinkies… So sad. Maybe if you invested in a pair of testicles instead of opting for the cock enhancement surgery, you wouldn’t have had such a pathetic life.
The list is meh at best.
Want a fun drink?
1oz of Southern Comfort
1oz of Jagermeister
1oz of Gin
Mix with some soda water and add ice to a highball glass. If you’ve not gone through a second puberty, you’ve done it wrong.
April 23rd, 2008 at 1:44 am
For those wanting the UK version of snakebite with a little more bite, try 1 bottle Carlsberg Elephant Beer plus 1 bottle Diamond White with your shot of blackcurrant.
Alternatively, depth charge a vodka and blackcurrant into your pint of snakebite, or combine the whole lot for a night you’ll instantly forget.
April 23rd, 2008 at 2:22 am
These drinks are about as manly as male cosmetics.
April 23rd, 2008 at 2:37 am
Poofter list.
Long Island Iced Tea not even there
April 23rd, 2008 at 2:57 am
Any manly coktail should be salty
Bull shot:
Beef bouillon or beef consomme
Vodka
(Salt, Pepper, Tabasco, Lea & Perrin’sWorcestershire sauce, Lemon all optional)
Sherry Mary:
Tomato juice
Pale Dry Sherry
(Salt, Pepper, Celery, Tabasco, Lea & Perrin’sWorcestershire sauce, Lemon all optional)
Dirty Martini:
Juice from a can of olives
Gin
April 23rd, 2008 at 2:58 am
i’m pretty sure that picture of “gin and juice” is actually a sad attempt at a mojito; lime, crumpled mint leaf.
great choice for #1! not that i’m biased. nice to see someone point out that a manhattan is supposed to be made with rye, not bourbon.
April 23rd, 2008 at 4:12 am
BEER??
April 23rd, 2008 at 4:22 am
a proper martini should be at least 4 parts gin (preferably 6) to 1 part vermouth, with an olive.
btw the jakies round here drink buckfast and white lightning cider cocktails - not sure its a “man’s” drink as such, but lord, its effective.
the real gone alkies drink gloss paint filterd through a white loaf - not recommended.
April 23rd, 2008 at 4:35 am
good list. here’s one that’s probably not well known (for good reason). very good for shutting up anyone who claims they will drink anything.
Urine Sample
2 shots everclear
add to 1/2 pint good ‘ol American swill lager
served warm (not lukewarm, more like just-left-the-human-body warm). best way is to microwave the drink for a short time. definetely not something to make for yourself!
if you can guzzle this with a straight face, you’re far more manly then i am.
April 23rd, 2008 at 5:06 am
FAIL!!!! on both sides of the pond
A Snake bit is Yukon Jack with Tabasco dripping into it.
Grenadine is for Shirley Temples Ya pu$$ies!!
April 23rd, 2008 at 5:33 am
I always drink a Tom Collins: Gin and Sour Mix.
It’s a balls-to-the-wall drink. Pure sour, pure gin.
April 23rd, 2008 at 5:49 am
Really, definitely missing the white russian!
Also, I was under the impression that the snake bite was harp & cider as well!
Groovy list, however!
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:16 am
Ok, a PROPER Martini is all about technique….
Fill your shaker with ice, add a 1/2 jigger of vermouth…. shake well… dump the vermouth out, a tiny amount adheres to the sides and the ice, thats just enough.
Pour the gin into the shaker, and STIR to combine. Sorry guys, Bond had this one wrong, a shaken Martini gets too cold too fast and comes out a bit off. Strain into a Martini glass and enjoy.
I am overjoyed to see that Martini’s on this list are all made with Gin, not Vodka… a vodka vermouth may be a nice drink, but a Martini it is not.
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:17 am
Kentucky Bourbon served neat appears to be missing from your “list”, so is Gin and Tonic. Too many of these “cocktails” seem to be mixed drinks.
My Martini:
3 1/2 oz Gin
1/2 tsp Dry Vermouth (not quite Churchill style)
Lime Twist (preferably a real twist and not a wedge, lime juice in the martini ruins it, just he essential oils are all I want, you should see them on the surface of the drink)
It is quite refreshing on a summer day.
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:21 am
you forgot liquid cocaine, mongolian motherf*****, and this drink at rum jungle at mandalay bay called the volcano which is bacardi 151, bacardo 151(dif from bacardi), and red juice…..those are hardcore man drinks
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:28 am
The “manliest” beverage I’ve ever heard of is half-and-half Everclear and Tabasco. If that doesn’t light your fire, nothing will…
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:33 am
You are all a bunch of girlie-men. The only thing a real man mixes with liquor is ice.
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:35 am
Stopped reading after you called Guinness the ‘World’s Thickest Stout’.
April 23rd, 2008 at 7:22 am
Here’s a really manly shot, it’s called Jet Fuel. It consists of equal parts 151, Jager, and Ice 101. A bar I used to frequent would give them out free at closing time. It will put hair on your chest.
April 23rd, 2008 at 7:30 am
What about the Three Wisemen? Three of my favorite men….taken consecutively and it will knock you on your butt. I’ve also had this shot at bars that put all three shots in a small glass and you chug…
A shot of Jack, a shot of Jim, and a shot of Jose all taken one right after another.
April 23rd, 2008 at 7:34 am
Guinness is the world’s thickest stout? Lol. Wow. The final gravity of guinness is lower than that of many mainstream lagers, even, let alone any real stout. There are stouts out there that are in an actual physical sense 13%+ thicker.
April 23rd, 2008 at 8:06 am
As much as I’m a fan of neat whiskey and water, it ain’t really a cocktail, issit?
April 23rd, 2008 at 8:08 am
Herradura Anejo, rocks with a little salt and a squeeze of lime. Plain and simple… Not much more manly than that. Used to be a JD man but Tequila is my drink of choice now.
April 23rd, 2008 at 8:38 am
Sweet Jesusmeister
Fire&Ice and Jeigermeister. Also, kudos to three wisemen previously posted. You’ll hear voices. My buddy and I that came up with the sweet jesusmeister drink all three wisemen separately then slam a tall sweet jesusmeister. We sometimes act out the nativity when imbibing. This is not something you end the night with. Good tip: ask the bartender for a made-up shot. When they don’t know what you’re talking about and you educate them, they sometimes don’t know what to charge you. This can backfire and you get charged more than you wanted to spend. “Hey landlord, set me up a nativity.”
April 23rd, 2008 at 8:40 am
I can’t believe the Cement Mixer was left off of this list.
1 shot Bailey’s® Irish cream, 1/2 shot lime juice, 1/2 shot 151 proof rum.
Fill one shot glass with Bailey’s. Fill second shot glass with Lime and 151. Pour Bailey’s into mouth, do not swallow. Pour Lime and 151 into mouth. Shake head back and fourth, the shot will turn solid.
April 23rd, 2008 at 8:57 am
I see a lot of “what no soco?!” on here. Soco is what girls in high school drink when they want someone to take advantage of them. Not very manly.
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:06 am
My late Great Uncle John drank Manhattans and he could kick anyone’s ass at 84.
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:25 am
This list is alright but I can think of a ton of other drinks that are more manly. This list is probably the list of drinks you can have a few times without throwing up and passing out. However I know there are better, more manly drinks out there like “Liquid Cocaine” and the “Adios Mother F*cker” that are more manly than these.
Technically those are shots though.
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:26 am
Half of these posters come across as 18 year olds trying to sound more ‘manly’ than the last.
“YOU GUYS SUCK!! I drink straight ethenol… and light my FACE on FIRE with it too! Yeah! That’s a real mans drink!1!!”
Let me assure you, you’re not impressing anyone.
The list is decent, if not perfect. These are drinks that an actual sane man would drink. Guiness may not be the Thickest Stout ever, but compared to the fizzy yellow piss-water that most American’s call beer, it’s pretty damn close.
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:27 am
Correction.
Bond doesn’t drink martinis. He drinks vodka, straight.
Why a man of such refine would fall short in his choice of drink is beyond me.
Vodka is for sorority girls.
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:41 am
You might want to try a bloody bull: 2 oz tequilla, 1/2 tomato juice, 1/2 beef bouillon, then garnished or spiced with whatever you want. Nobody would question your manhood, even in your tight matador outfit.
Also, the pictures are wrong. The snakebite photo looks like some cream drink and the Gin and Juice has mint and cucumber in it, which seems like it’s probably a fancy Gin and Tonic or a sorry-ass Mojito.
April 23rd, 2008 at 10:01 am
The Red Witch is the mother and father of all cocktails.
mix 1/2 pt dry cider with 1/2 pt stella artois lager, then drink a couple of mouthfuls so you have room to add:
double vodka
double pernod
blackcurrant cordial
it tastes like blackjack sweets, and I’ve never finished more than 2.
April 23rd, 2008 at 10:13 am
If you don’t have a flaming sambuca directly on the mouth, this can be a manly list of drinks.
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=sambuca+on+the+mouth&search=Search
April 23rd, 2008 at 10:31 am
If drinking mixed drinks with fancy names makes you a man….then there really is something wrong with people today. Last time I checked if your the guy at the bar ordering frat boy themed shots, your a douchebag. BTW Harp and Cider is a Golden.
April 23rd, 2008 at 10:40 am
Stunning how many do not understand that a cocktail is a mixed drink…not straight alcohol on the rocks, neat or in shots.
April 23rd, 2008 at 10:51 am
Yuppies are the only people who order those drinks.
April 23rd, 2008 at 10:52 am
If you’re going to make a list of the manliest drinks in the world you should probably list drinks that actually exist in the WORLD… order an Irish Car Bomb in Ireland and you WILL get your ass kicked.
Rusty Nails rock!
April 23rd, 2008 at 11:14 am
Dude, SERIOUSLY. Where IS the White Russian?!!!
April 23rd, 2008 at 11:17 am
we created a shooter called a Brain - 1/2 shot of Raspberry Schnaps on top of a 1/2 shot of Baileys Irish Cream. Yummy
April 23rd, 2008 at 11:59 am
Where’s the Prairie Fire? i.e. a shot (or more) of tequila, plus Tabasco sauce for heat
Gets you hammered, makes your lips burn, and the only place I’ve had one was in a strip club. ’nuff said.
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:12 pm
Flaming Blue Steel FTW!
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:41 pm
The Homeless Bostonian
1 oz. Listerine Mouthwash
1 oz. Paint Thinner
2 oz. Thunderbird brand wine
April 23rd, 2008 at 12:53 pm
Number one isn’t on this list. its called a Sourtoe. It’s served in Dawson City, Yukon, Canada.
Recipie:
1 part cocktail of your choice
1 severed human toe (for real)
-You can drink it fast, or drink it slow, but the lips have gotta touch the toe
They keep a whole jar full of them (acquired from frostbitten donors).
April 23rd, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Guiness is the thickest stout in the world? Bullshit, Guiness is the *weakest* stout in the world. Except for maybe Beamish. Maybe.
And the original Sazerac recipe did call for absinthe, and used cognac instead of rye, people starting substituting rye because of the difficulty obtaining cognac during prohibition.
Jesus fucking christ, do your research.
April 23rd, 2008 at 1:13 pm
I believe the list was written by an 18 year old. No professional drinker would come within a mile of most of them. Irish Cream is NEVER manly, no matter how much whiskey or Guinness you mix it with, nor is anything made with “Sunkist”. And Yukon Jack is a teenager’s idea of whiskey. ‘Nuff said.
My liver laughs at this list and its author!
April 23rd, 2008 at 2:50 pm
Tell an Irish bartender you want an ‘Irish’ car bomb and he’s likely to spit in your glass before serving it up to you. Have some respect and simply call it a Car Bomb.
April 23rd, 2008 at 2:59 pm
My drink is something I call a Yellow Jacket
half fill a short glass with crushed ice
1 shot lemon juice
1 shot Everclear
It’s a Yellow Peril if you use wimpy vodka
April 23rd, 2008 at 3:35 pm
When the US was still just colonies, and well before ice was available, one popular drink was the “Rummer”: equal parts dark rum, peach brandy and apricot brandy. Spend a long, hot summer evening drinking those and discussing politics and you’ll get an idea of where the founding fathers found the guts to take on the evil overlords - and win!
April 23rd, 2008 at 4:27 pm
Jack warm and straight hoorah
April 23rd, 2008 at 4:34 pm
This list is obviously lacking a gin gimlet. They’re all my granddad’s been drinking since the 1930s. And he is a complete badass.
April 23rd, 2008 at 5:35 pm
Prairie Oyster
1 teaspoon Worcestershire Sauce
1 tablespoon Tomato Juice
1 whole Egg Yolk
2 dashes Vinegar
1 dash Pepper
Pour in order in a wine glass taking good care of not breaking the yolk.
Choke that down at 7 am, pulling yourself together for your construction job, then we can start talking about who’s a man.
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:18 pm
Bond drinks vodka martinis
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:55 pm
doh! Any fool knows that the Juice in a Gin and Juice is Grapefruit Juice and not Orange Juice. fail.
April 23rd, 2008 at 8:58 pm
For all you Phillies fans out there, the most Manly drink ever created is a Burrel Bomb.
It’s taken just like an Irish Car Bomb but consist of a half glass of Red Bull and a shot of Tequilla. Every time Pat Burrel hits a homer, me and my fellow Phillies fans rush to the nearest bar, if we aren’t already there, and down one for our favorite left fielder in the game. Oh and if he hits multiple homers in a game, each homerun you double the content of the drink.
LETS GO PHILLIES….Cheers!
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:24 pm
Keep it simple: Scotch & Soda. Unfortunately I have ordered this and on numerous occasions had a cocktail waitress give me a list of the different types of soda they offer “okay for soda we have mello yellow, Coke, sprite, etc, etc” If I am feeling nice I just say “tell the bartender I want a Scotch & Soda” if I am not feeling nice, I say ” You no the soda gun behind the bar that all the different soda’s come out of? Use the really big button labeled soda”. For Christ’s sake it’s a two-component drink, the name of both drink components are in the name of the drink, and I have still actually been served a scotch and Sprite.
On another note, even when it does get made with the proper ingredients, before I take a sip, I slide it over to my friend who shall we say “does not appreciate the flavor of peat” and if he doesn’t cringe, I make the bartender remake the drink.
If your asking why I am drinking with someone who “doesn’t appreciate the taste of peat”, he often buys.
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:47 pm
Not a single manly drink on the list…. And the comment about Guiness??? Whoa. I’ve had Pan Brau that you can cut 50\50 with water and it’s still tougher than Guiness. Not that Guiness is a bad pint mind you….
Here in Portland we have a drink that is truly manly however. Behold.
The Sterno Haemorrhage
1. Get 2 small cans of Sterno fuel. (Used to keep catering trays hot)
2. Scoop the gel out of both cans, (about 12 oz.) and stuff it down one of the socks you’ve been wearing since whenever.
3. Squeeze the gel loaded sock over a partially eaten can of Pork and Beans.
4. Finish the can.
5. Wake up somewhere else…
April 23rd, 2008 at 9:59 pm
I think the list could use a little tweaking, there are some manly drinks left off and some pussy drinks put on, but the argument must be made that to drink Bacardi 151 with anything is just gross. Stuff tastes like shit, and if you’re going to drink something that strong, get your hands on some good ol moonshine. I had some that was 180 proof. Almost pure alcohol. That shot put some hair on my chest. Point is, 151 isnt manly, its disgusting. Its for guys who want to look manly by drinking the strongest legal drink.
April 24th, 2008 at 9:51 am
I would vote for the American Beauty cocktail as the greatest real-man drink. Check it out on my site TenTenTwo.com
April 24th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
how about a jersey turnpike.. its pretty much the left over liquor that gets collected in those rubber mats on top of the bar where the bartender mixes the drinks (but u can only get it as the last shot of the night so u get a decent combo). thatll put some hair on ur sack.
April 24th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
I personally like Prairie Fires. A shot of Tequilla with Tabasco on top.
April 24th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
Anyone here dissing manhattans has not had one. They will kick your ass harder than anything you can imagine - don’t let the cherry fool you, kids.
bb
April 25th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
Interesting, how many of you who have never had a Crown Royal Manhattan straight-up had something to say about it not being a “Man’s Drink”? Amazing, drink a few of them you little girls and let’s see you stagger out of your pussy little club where you’ve been drinking vodka and Red Bull……….basically a Screwdriver for the new millenium. Pussies.
It’s a man’s cocktail- pure jet fuel- and great whiskey. Whiskey being a euphemism for “He of huge cock who drinks the water”.
And the Rusty Nail ain’t bad either (with Johnny Black, of course…..)
April 25th, 2008 at 11:11 pm
“# Andy Says: April 23rd, 2008 at 2:22 am : These drinks are about as manly as male cosmetics.” - = You win at Internet.
Yeah, and no Cognac, what a shame.
Real man knows that canadian whisky must be included in every drinks.
one shot of caribou (french canadian whisky liquor recipe) can ressurect a frozen dead man. If you don’t agree, you are wrong.
We’ve traded this shit to the indians for furs long time ago and look at the results: They we’re dead drunks all day long.
April 28th, 2008 at 2:41 am
“Vodka is for sorority girls.”
Excuse *me* Palooka, but I drink shots of Finlandia, straight outta the freezer.
Fie on ya!
May 1st, 2008 at 11:03 am
I don’t think I’ve ever had a single drink on this list - my old man (when he drank a cocktail) drank whiskey cocktails in a rocks glass. I remember the first time I went to the bar with the old guy, he ordered two of the usual, and I’ve been drinking the same thing at the same bar ever since.
Bourbon, bitters, and a twist of lime - seem to recall it was an awfully popular cocktail among the war vets who all worked up at the refinery on 12 hour shifts while the wives stayed home and took care of the house.
Manly? I dunno, but some of those guys are in their 70s and 80s now, and still nobody fucks with them in their bar.
May 1st, 2008 at 11:18 am
some of the list is suspect, but i totally agree with the top 2 drinks.
and anyone who rips on a manhattan needs to go back and sit at the kiddie table and play ‘go fish’ and finish their zima.
May 10th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
“Anonymous Says:
April 23rd, 2008 at 1:22 am
…Baby couldn’t handle his drinkies… So sad. Maybe if you invested in a pair of testicles instead of opting for the cock enhancement surgery, you wouldn’t have had such a pathetic life…
I’d like to see you in about 10 years, “anonymous”. The kind of drinking you do will rot your brain in no time flat… But then I’m sure you’ve already had those moments where you promised God that you’d never drink again if he’d just make it all go away.
See you at the meetings.
May 10th, 2008 at 8:57 pm
Hey, I found a site with people who drink the manly cocktails in the world.
Just go here and check it out. They’re the real professionals: http://www.tutztutz.com/2008/05/remarkable-drunk-people-collection/