Uh-oh. It looks like someone has put on a few "my-ex-boyfriend-Ryan-Reynolds-is-now-engaged-to-Scarlett-Johannson" pounds. But, honestly, I saw this coming a while ago. After seeing her in concert a few months back, I noticed the lyrics to her hit song "Ironic" seemed a little different than the original. I got a copy of the new version and it explains a lot. Here's a few snippets:
An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
I want to put some whipped cream on a slice of cheesecake
And isn't it ironic... don't you think
Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
Get me some spanish peanuts. And lots
and lots of pie.
And isn't it ironic... don't you think
A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-eating sign just when you bought some crepes
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
Because you want to hork down an entire Thanksgiving dinner
Because Ryan's making-out with Scarlett that whore whore whore
And isn't it ironic...don't you think
A little too ironic...and, yeah, I really do think...
The weird part is, some of these new lyrics don't even rhyme. Oh well.
You saw her in concert? Turn in your man card right now! It would be one thing to say, "I saw her in concert with this hot chick who promised to act like a whore if I went with her." But, I am suspicious that you went alone and touched yourself several times.
um... the clutching of the tummy and the glow in her face leads me to belive she is carying tom cruises 2 kid....oops i mean 1st the other one is chris kliens kid
Wow, what rock do you guys live under???! This photo is before her North American tour (early 2008), and she has lost all the weight. She is totally ripped now with "Madge" arms!!! I saw her in both San Diego, and L.A. in November and she looks great. She has dark straight hair with bangs too! Very hot!
(18 Comments)
Twitter
Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
May 27th, 2008 at 01:10 pm
It going to be hard for her to go down on you in a theater.
May 27th, 2008 at 01:53 pm
I'd feed her my meat.
May 27th, 2008 at 02:27 pm
Come on, be honest. You'd still do her.
May 27th, 2008 at 03:38 pm
You saw her in concert? Turn in your man card right now! It would be one thing to say, "I saw her in concert with this hot chick who promised to act like a whore if I went with her." But, I am suspicious that you went alone and touched yourself several times.
May 27th, 2008 at 03:45 pm
TURN IN YOUR MAN CARD! Men do not go to Alanis Morissette concerts. Did she open for Wilson Phillips or something? Is that what drew you in?
May 27th, 2008 at 04:44 pm
Cuz she's got one hand in her pocket and the other is clutching a twinkie. And what it all comes down to is, she hasn't eaten her fill of ho-ho's yet.
May 27th, 2008 at 05:10 pm
One too many jagged little pills
May 27th, 2008 at 11:15 pm
"A no-eating sign just when you bought some crepes"!!! *peed a little*
May 28th, 2008 at 03:47 am
She's pregnant, you douchebags
May 29th, 2008 at 12:51 am
um... the clutching of the tummy and the glow in her face leads me to belive she is carying tom cruises 2 kid....oops i mean 1st the other one is chris kliens kid
June 24th, 2008 at 08:31 pm
she's not fat!! she's preggers!
June 24th, 2008 at 11:29 pm
no problem. she just needs to start barfing again.
June 26th, 2008 at 01:25 pm
Yeah I would love to do her now. I figure since she is fat a guy like me has a shot now!!! Sweet!!! Yo Lany give me ya numba I got some chocolate pie!
January 4th, 2009 at 08:05 pm
Wow, what rock do you guys live under???! This photo is before her North American tour (early 2008), and she has lost all the weight. She is totally ripped now with "Madge" arms!!! I saw her in both San Diego, and L.A. in November and she looks great. She has dark straight hair with bangs too! Very hot!
May 24th, 2009 at 06:34 pm
she must have started barfing in the toilet again then.
March 13th, 2009 at 01:38 pm
Greek Theatre- she had the audacity to where white pants, eeewwwwww, must have been on the rag.
March 13th, 2009 at 01:42 pm
Probably fit 2 dicks in that mouth now.
May 24th, 2009 at 06:40 pm
Canadian Horse Face is thin again. looks like she's been barfing.
Post new comment