The 10 Most Worthless College Majors
College is a great place to learn and have fun. But let’s not kid ourselves, some degrees are as useless as the plot in a Michael Bay film. Here’s a list of 10 degrees that may be interesting, but do jack shit for you in the real world.
10. Art History
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: With an art history degree you could maybe curate an art gallery or work at a museum or….yeah, that’s it. That’s all you can do. And seeing as how every art gallery and museum I’ve ever been to has exactly one dude sitting quietly at a desk reading a New Yorker and eating a food that requires chopsticks, I’m going to go ahead and assume there’s not a lot of positions open in the field. That means you’re going to have to venture out into the corporate world. And let me inform you, when you’re interviewing with Bob from the HR team at Wal-Mart who’s wearing a tie that has the twin towers smoking with writing underneath that says “We Will Never Forget,” your art history degree says to him “I’m a commie a-hole who thinks I’m better than guys with 9/11 ties.”
What Job You’ll End Up With: After your parents boot your ass from your bedroom to make room for anything that’s not your bedroom, you’ll wander towards the nearest coffee shop and get a job there, which will allow you to meet artists who will thank you for allowing them to put fliers by the cash register that inform people of their upcoming show that touts “the combination of art and flute.”
9. Philosophy
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: This isn’t ancient Greece: No one is going to pay you money, or allow you to sodomize their attractive son, in exchange for your knowledge of existence. Never has there been an employer who’s said “Man, we’re having all kinds of problems, I wish we had someone on our team who could reference and draw conclusions from the story of Siddhartha that would pull up our fourth quarter numbers.” I took many philosophy classes and it involved reading and smoking a shit pile of weed. You don’t need to pay 20,000 dollars a year to do that. All you need is twenty dollars and a library card.
What Job You’ll End Up With: Thanks to your extensive knowledge of philosophy, you’re now self-aware enough to know that most jobs out there will make you totally miserable. So most likely you’ll wait tables part time and hope someone starts paying you for the bi-monthly entries on your blog.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: If you’re not named Achmed or Bjork or G’Day Mate this isn’t a degree, it’s the last 18 years of your life. If you really want to study us you don’t need to go to some stupid class, you need only to sit back and watch a two-hour block of Must-See TV to understand The American. After doing my own research, it seems that this mysterious creature is a pot-bellied humanoid with a hot wife and bad credit who has a penchant for low-calorie beer, Chilis, Applebees, TGIFridays, Denny’s, McDonald’s, Taco Bell, Dave and Busters, Steak and Shake, Chilis (again) and Red Lobster. Oh and he can totally demolish a White Castle Crave Case in, like, 20 seconds. OK, now give me my degree.
What Job You’ll End Up With: To take your American Studies degree one step further, you will be qualified to do 40-50 years of “graduate work” cleaning tables and taking orders at a Chilis, Applebees, TGIFridays or Red Lobster. Or possibly Denny’s.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: I didn’t even know this was a major until I found it on the Appalachian State website. According to their actual explanation of this major: “Music therapy is the scientific application of the art of music within a therapeutic relationship to meet the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual needs of individuals.” Which is a big, fancy way of saying “We’ll teach you how to make a mix tape.” I guess I, too, am a qualified music therapist because my “Summer Jams ‘95” tape I made in the 10th grade totally rocked my house party. All my friends told me that kicking it off with Wreckz-N-Effects “Rump Shaker” followed by Coolio’s “Gangsta’s Paradise” totally met their physical, mental and spiritual needs to help them get wasted on my dad’s Schnapps and Drambuie.
What Job You’ll End Up With: After realizing that yoga studios and elderly homes don’t pay people just to come in and set mood music, you’re sadly going to end up putting your degree towards burning a fire to keep warm because you are homeless.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: Go into a communications class on any given day and it’ll smell like dried semen and booze. Reason being, communications is the major for anyone who wants to graduate, but doesn’t want to stop getting totally wasted on weekdays. Here’s the bad news, if an employer is going to hire someone to help decipher how human beings communicate, he’s going to hire someone with the letters “Dr.” before their name, not the person who first checks to see if a class is offered online, then when they find out it’s not, let’s out a “gaaaaay bro.”
What Job You’ll End Up With: You’ll go to several job interviews that turn out to be pyramid schemes, even though at first you won’t realize this and come home and tell your parents, who you still live with, “They said I’ll probably be making six figures in less than a year just by selling these beer cozies.”
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: Despite what “Dancing with the Stars” and “High School Musical” may tell you, there aren’t a lot of dancing jobs out there—so you better be good because there aren’t any gigs for mediocre dancers. Outside of New York City or some crap in LA there is absolutely nothing you can do with a dance degree that doesn’t involve actually dancing for money. And since the Des Moines interpretive dance movement hasn’t really taken off yet, you have a better chance landing a job as an 8-Track repairman or a member of the Beatles.
What Job You’ll End Up With: After moving to New York and trying out for Hello Dolly! or Damn Yankees or any of the other seven Broadway plays that want dancers and not landing a single one because you got your dance degree from Ball State, you will find ample opportunity to show off your choreographic skills at one of the city’s many strip clubs. You’ll just need to change your name to Crystal or Bambi and you’ll be able finally live out your dream as a dancer. (Mom and Dad will be so proud!)
4. English Lit
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: If someone can spend a weekend with a box of Cliff’s Notes and have only a slightly less conversational knowledge of what you spent 4 years studying, you probably don’t have the most employer friendly degree. Having an English Lit degree is like being a member of the Kansas City Royals: No one cares and the best you can hope for is every once in a while someone buys you a beer because of it.
What Job You’ll End Up With: You can read and comprehend, so that gives you an advantage over 99.5% of the people that peruse Craig’s list job listings. Therefore, you’ll most likely end up landing an entry level position at a random small company, or showing up to your interview and being raped repeatedly by a group of masked men.
3. Latin
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: Not only does no one speak this language anymore, but we already have all the Latin that exists in the world. There’s no new Latin that’s hot off the presses that needs immediate translating. I’m no business major, but majoring in a language that doesn’t exist anymore doesn’t sound so good for job security. And I’m sorry to break the news to you, but the world doesn’t need someone to translate The Bible or the inscription on the side of a Post Office or El Loco Latino’s “Latin House Party.”
What Job You’ll End Up With: Since you majored in something that doesn’t exist, you’re going to have two jobs. Your first one will be as the annoying pretentious guy who gives everyone the Latin etymology of every big word he hears at every dinner party he attends. Your second, and most lucrative job, will be as a Subway Sandwich Artist.
2. Film
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: No one in hollywood gives a shit that you made a short film about an alcoholic albino that discovers the meaning of life through the help of a retarded child. Unless that retarded child was played by the son of Harvey Weinstein, your film or degree will be as pointless as the last three seasons of Lost
What Job You’ll End Up With: If you’re lucky, you’ll have an uncle who can get you a job as a production assistant on CSI Miami, where your time will be spent making coffee runs and finding whores that will let David Caruso pee on them.
1. Religion
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: Sorry God, but a major in Religion is about as worthless as St. Brice (The Patron Saint of Stomach Aches.) Even Duke University can’t put a solid sell on this degree: “A major in religion offers intellectual excitement and can be a pathway to a liberal education.” OK, you sold me. So now I get to shell out about a hundred thousand dollars so I can know what to wear to a Shinto ceremony and learn how many virgins Allah will give me if I blow myself up in an Israeli square? If it’s OK with you, I’ll keep my money and stick to my sinning-a-lot-now-and-repenting-on-my-deathbed plan.
What Job You’ll End Up With: This one is tricky. On one hand you’ll probably end up working behind the desk of a Christian Science Reading Room. But on the other, you may end up with everlasting peace and spiritual enlightenment. Let’s call it a draw.
Tags: 10 most worthless college degrees
June 3rd, 2008 at 4:58 pm
Que the bitching
June 3rd, 2008 at 5:49 pm
Even though I’m a film major, I’m not in the least bit offended by #2… Because it’s true! Most student films suck more than Boondock Saints. Now cue the bitching.
June 3rd, 2008 at 5:56 pm
I would say Social Work is the most expensive useless degree. $200,000 education so you can make $18,000 and live in the worst neighborhoods in the country. Just go to community college. And the worst are the women who then go back and get their masters in social work. $400,000 education total to make at the most $24,000 your whole life.
June 3rd, 2008 at 6:01 pm
Gaaaaay bro
That had me cracking up!
My brother got a minor in latin and he makes me want to kill him
June 3rd, 2008 at 7:09 pm
You forgot the dark horse in this set of degrees… the MRS degree. This is when attractive chicks go to college with the sole intention of finding a smart guy majoring in a lucrative field and marrying him. She lures him in saying that she is undecided at the moment and wants to “get to know you better.” If a college chick says this without any alcohol in her, run for the hills.
She only does this because she realizes that she’s too much of a dumbass to make it on her own and has too much dignity to blowjob her way to the top (but just enough dignity to ride some dude’s coattails), so she finds the nearest soon-to-be-successful guy out there and leeches onto him for all it’s worth. A few kids and car payments later, here comes a divorce (cue the mentally distressed and emotionally abused card) and she is instantly loaded with half of the poor guy’s estate.
Add a vanity license plate that says “WAS HIS” for added effect and cruelty.
June 3rd, 2008 at 7:22 pm
hey!! first you trash my school, now my major. i have 4 words for you guys, “zero-byte-size reply”
June 3rd, 2008 at 7:25 pm
Best BO (build-order) ever:
Double Major in Japanese and Psychology
Minor in Film.
That way you can trick people into giving you free beer in tokyo and get it on camera.
June 3rd, 2008 at 7:28 pm
the whole university game is a nasty little scheme designed to defraud the uninitiated. work bunnies! set goals and achieve on your own, your degree only contributes to the death of a tree. …. “read ths text, write about it… read this text, write about it… read this text….” you’re tell me you can’t do that on your own? seriously?.. some of the most successful people i know are high school dropouts and “I’m not even from west virginia.”
June 4th, 2008 at 5:49 am
Queue… the bitching.
June 4th, 2008 at 6:38 am
What about IDS (interdisciplinary studies)? This one might as well be chalked up to “I can bullshit about a whole lot of things” degree.
June 4th, 2008 at 6:52 am
#9. Philosophy, always gets me. I have a few friends that dropped out of the business college to persue this degree. I’d rather pay for my kid to go to bartending school
June 4th, 2008 at 7:18 am
I studied 2 years of a 3 years Physics degree before realising it was useless and shit. I now work in “management” at a fast food restaurant
June 4th, 2008 at 7:21 am
Um, hello? Women’s studies? That shit should be number one.
June 4th, 2008 at 7:43 am
@ 1, Realist.
It’s “cue” the bitching. I know, because I was an English Lit major–with a concentration in drama, so it was EXTRA useless
The writer did forget to mention that, much like art history can only lead to museum jobs, English degrees can only lead to teaching. Teaching or nothing. /cry
June 4th, 2008 at 8:57 am
You left of “Human Development/Family Studies,” a popular major at Auburn University. I have yet to understand what you do with that degree.
June 4th, 2008 at 9:04 am
Music Business.
It was the Dude’s degree. It was also my roomate’s in college. I believe he works at a car dealership now.
June 4th, 2008 at 9:54 am
The Iliad or The Odyssey are in greek…
June 4th, 2008 at 9:55 am
The number one most worthless degree is definitely “LIBERAL ARTS” hands down; total waste of time/money.
June 4th, 2008 at 9:57 am
you completely ig’nant sons of bitches, philosophy is what many pre-law undergrads pursue… but I’m a civil engineering major so what do I care >_>
June 4th, 2008 at 9:58 am
What, no mention of my financially worthless degree - history. After graduation I worked four years in an electroplating factory, then went to a technical school and got a job as a software engineer.
June 4th, 2008 at 9:59 am
eh im a communications major, it actually doesnt have much to do with just people communicating. ever turn on the news, a sports broadcast, the radio, open a newspaper or magazine, and not to mention the thousands of ads you see everywhere these days? yea, the majority of the people of involved in all that were probably comm majors.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:00 am
oir end up writing ultra lame top ten lists.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:01 am
nothing could be worse than ending up writing ultra lame top ten lists.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:02 am
hey, don’t forget a theatre degree. Who wouldn’t want to major in playing pretend for four years?
June 4th, 2008 at 10:03 am
I don’t agree with you on the communication’s degree (too many CEO’s, corporate sales professionals, and lawyers that make a s**t load have a communications degree , but everything else sounds about right.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:06 am
It’s actually a communication major. The plural is incorrect. At least I learned something during my time in the program. You should have taken notes =)
You’re correct about the booze, women and procrastination though. Wrong about how it pans out. A com major is for people who know how the system works, have made the right connections and are there to maximize the experience. Academia and the real world have almost nothing in common. It’s like honors programs. There are two types of students. The “smart” ones that spend all of their time studying, wasting hours of their lives reading every page and memorizing every fact and then the “intelligent” ones who drink/smoke/party more than just about any other group on campus and still take home the scholarships, top grades etc. - the difference is the second group has the system figured out. They know how it works, and make it work for them.
Then again - what do I know. I went to the infamous ASU, was a Com student and spent half my time in Dance classes. Maybe my time spent with the #3 Commercial Real Estate Brokerage firm in the nation and working in the Merger and Acquisitions Industry was a fluke =)
June 4th, 2008 at 10:07 am
You can add Bachelor of Arts in political science to the list. Its like philosophy for morons.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:09 am
As a civil servant I can tell you that all of those degrees will land you a job… after you give up all hope of happiness.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:12 am
Wow. Seems like a lot of people I know who attend college do it for the false sense of security. There are plenty of unemployed lawyers and PhDs out there. There’s more to success than a mere degree.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:17 am
You can do more than teach with an English degree. I turned mine into a Marketing career path, with plenty of contract writing work on the side. The Latin course I took didn’t hurt either, since it helped me to learn the etymology of many common words we use today. And the other people I work with in Marketing? Most of them have Communications degrees. In an age where you need a degree in almost anything to get a decent job, it’s a shame to see such ignorance. But what do I know? I actually bothered to take the time to respond to such a lame post.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:18 am
Nice linkbait.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:21 am
Fuck You! You no talent hack! If you think Boondock Saints is a shit movie, then I’ll see you in Subway. I hope your kids get down syndrome Scott.
Dictated but not read
June 4th, 2008 at 10:23 am
A little known secret about a great college major: Geography. Its lucrative with GIS technologies and many governments and businesses use Geographers, even though they may not call them that in the title. And, there are not enough of us, which, for me at least, has equated to a type of expertise garnering higher salaries.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:24 am
Physics is turning out to be a pretty lame degree, too. Engineering would have been half the work and twice the money. It’s really just philosophy with math that some people might pay you for after a decade or so.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:25 am
No Political Science on the list? If that’s not a useless degree, well… Wanna hire me?
June 4th, 2008 at 10:27 am
Double major in History and Political Science
Minor in Economics
Qualified for: Beating you at jeopardy… that’s about it.
Law school it is.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:29 am
Hey A.B.
You are a blowhard ASU “grad” *cough*cough* whose last sentence reveals you for what you truly are. A douche.
Grats on your degree in douchebaggery!
June 4th, 2008 at 10:30 am
Bully for the list. My aunt teaches lit, and I couldn’t wait to tell her I had chosen lit as my major freshman year…at which point she cried and asked me if I wanted to spend the rest of my life unemployed.
However, there is a fundamental flaw in the thinking behind the list. The lower you are on the list, you can always trump those below you. For example, I have a lit degree….and I make decent money helping others get their Religious Studies degrees…haven’t been raped by masked men yet. Although if I was, I could both write a poem about it and critique that poem out of existence.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:30 am
All mental hospitals and many outpatient treatment centers employ art therapist fyi
June 4th, 2008 at 10:31 am
Iliad and Odyssey are greek, not latin.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:31 am
College is an odd bargain. I feel I have learned so much from my political science classes, but what I have learned is that high energy prices are going to devastate our economy so badly that most college grads will become insolvent and never be able to pay off their college debts. So as I sit there and get my education, I am learning that I probably can’t pay to be sitting there to learn.
College degree’s may become useless for the corporate moneymaking world, but valuable in enriching citizens so we can more easily form a cohesive society once oil prices take us down. The economy will dictate that we start to relocalize everything, so maybe a Dance major will be good for helping kids become healthy or entertained, perhaps film will be good for documenting social work, perhaps philosophy will be handy in a serious town hall discussion. College in the US requires only a third of our classes to be our major. Simply being well educated will make us better citizens and let us get through this next era of our history.
I still can’t figure out what good Latin could be..
June 4th, 2008 at 10:32 am
Famous Philosophy majors:
- Carl C. Icahn, corporate raider
- George Soros, financier and philanthropist
- Rudi Giuliani, former Mayor of New York City
- Richard Riorden, Former Mayor of Los Angeles
- Robert McNamara, former Secretary of Defense
- John Stoltzmann, winner of the World Poker Open
- Albert Schweitzer, winner of the Nobel Peace Prize
- Phil Jackson, NBA coach
- David Souter, Supreme Court Justice
- Thomas Jefferson, U. S. President
- Stephen Breyer, Associate Justice of the Supreme Court
and….
- Bruce Lee, martial artist and actor
Philosophy prepares you for a life in which you’ll need to know how to think, write, and present rational arguments. That can be used in countless fields.
Basically, if you’re smart enough to complete this course of study you’re smart enough to figure out how to get a good job and make money. The list speaks for itself.
Keep the faith!!!
June 4th, 2008 at 10:37 am
Andrew D. Tran Says:
June 4th, 2008 at 9:57 am
“you completely ig’nant sons of bitches, philosophy is what many pre-law undergrads pursue…”
Exactly my thought. I know two Philosophy majors (from the Seventies) each who went to law school. One became the Managing Partner of a 300 member law firm for the last thirty years and the other is a prominent trial lawyer at seven figures per annum. A major in Philosophy indicates a very keen and disciplined mind that applies to many other less esoteric professional pursuits and serves the educated man well.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:40 am
Hey, there’s nothing wrong with a communications degree! I’ve got one. And as soon as I find a job, I’ll prove it.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:42 am
When I was visiting Boston University, I was told a guy actually got a degree in Vampirology - the study of Vampires.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:44 am
I’m now in my late 30’s and I now believe that your major in college doesn’t mean shit. In non-engineering/science fields, all that matters is who you know and how hard you work. I have a friend with a philosophy degree who is an extremely successful ad exec. Another with a communications degree who is an extremely successful VP of sales at a mid-sized company. An on and on and on…
June 4th, 2008 at 10:45 am
@ Anorexic Ginger
I was wondering if Social Work would make the list. A friend of mine just withdrew her life savings to take this damn course. Couldn’t she put it to better use and DONATE it to a good cause? I doubt you need anything more than common sense (which I think she’s sorely lacking) to do social work. And you certainly don’t need to uproot, fly to another country and sell your soul for a fricking degree to do it.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:46 am
i am a film major who now has a great job working @ google
do what motivates you and you will do well
June 4th, 2008 at 10:46 am
Why is there a picture of a vibraphone for Music Therapy? Mallet percussion like that, the marimba, and xylophone is kick-ass and can get you lots of money for being good at it.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:47 am
Lets me honest…..most of these degrees are Liberal Arts degrees. Emphasis on the word Liberal. This why most liberals want wealth redistribution and cradle to grave entitlements. Because they CANT GET A JOB and they’re too lazy or stoned to try and actually work for a living. And, lets face it…there aren’t that many Starbucks out there to work at.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:50 am
Shit i hope my major lands me writing top ten lists.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:53 am
You’re dead wrong on the Latin degree. Anybody with a Latin degree can be hired to teach high school Latin even if they have no certificate - the school will pay you to get the teaching certificate. Growth in demand for Latin courses is enormous, and so they are now hiring.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:54 am
I agree with Phil a “Bachelors in Interdisciplinary Studies” is the most bullshit degree it means that any two minors equal a major… which translates to you aren’t actually good at anything but have been in school long enough to take enough credits to graduate…again without actually learning or being good at anything…
I disagree with Ginger though although a social work degree is expensive, the government will pay for your masters if you want it and have the grades to qualify for it though.. unlike most the degrees on here someone does have to do it, it does help people and does provide an actual job… although it pays like crap and seems like it would lead someone to be very depressed.
June 4th, 2008 at 10:57 am
The Iliad and The Odyssesy were written in Greek, genius.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:00 am
Blah. Philosophy is not for pavlovian (public school) animals. It is for the ruling class(employers). It teaches you to think. But what can I say, public school is not really about education. It is a psychology conditioning laboratory (trainning). A real education would rob this nation of its breathless efficiency because smart people are very difficult — they ask too many questions, they quit their jobs, etc. Good Manageable people cannot sustain thinking for long or really think at all. They are usually childish people who need attending to by adults(upper management). Their lives are mechanical (scripts). Their thoughts well controlled like the thoughts of machinery. Have you noticed that machines don’t ever surprise you after you know their habits? We need dependent human beings, needy people (see how everyone here talks being useful to someone else? aka having a job. That keeps my costs down as a businessman) unable to fill their own hours, unable to initiate lines of meaning to give substance and pleasure to their existence. A large fraction of our total economy has grown up around providing service and counseling to inadequate people - and inadequate people are the main product of government compulsion schools. Think Pavlov here with the intent that ‘Public education must limit itself to training working class students to carry out whatever task they are given to do and to accept the commands of their superiors.
That is what primary and secondary education is all about. i.e. dumbing down the masses to produce a more docile workforce trained to keep the economic engine going while remaining good servile citizens.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:03 am
I like how people still think it matters what kind of undergraduate degree you get.
Guess what guys: you’re all morons.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:06 am
It should be ‘whom in the sentence containing “your parents, who you still live with.” It only cost me $800 to learn that.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:09 am
English Lit can get you a lot of jobs, actually. I’m an English Lit Major - and I’ve already been published, gotten job offers and I haven’t even graduated yet.
This degree makes it possible for me to get a lot of different interesting and well-paid jobs — a number of them in private business, or government as well as the old standard of teaching (not going to teach, myself - no patience for it), and L.I.S.
And as someone has already pointed out, The Iliad and the Odyssey were written in GREEK!!! Obviously, you failed lit, and that’s why you can’t appreciate it.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:10 am
I don’t know about needing a major in it, but Latin seems fairly important for anyone in pre-med or going into sciences where…let’s see…EVERYTHING has a Latin term. As long as you can keep your mouth shut at parties, Latin is a great tool for life, and if you teach it, you have an excuse to wear a toga to work.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:11 am
Well well well, I have an undergraduate degree in philosophy and a Masters in social work. Two useless degrees according to the article and comments on this sight - right? I live virtually debt free in a brand new 3265 sq. ft. home on two acres in the Texas Hill Country and I am retired at the age of 50. How did I do it? Not in the stock market, not in business, but by using my ability to think clearly (philosophy) and applying that to a career path and to manage my money - and then using the knowledge gained from my Masters degree to be effective in my field. It isn’t so much the major as it is what you do with what you are taught.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:12 am
I find it amusing that someone writing a shitty blog site has the audacity to belittle someone’s chosen degree. Not that these degrees are all that useful, but neither is your site…or existence.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:12 am
I taught music for 12 years and worked closely with some music therapists during that time. I saw some fantastic results getting Autistic children to connect with the real world through the work of the music therapist.
Maybe yoga studios and elderly homes don’t pay, but school districts do! At least as much as a regular classroom teacher makes, which is a pitifully small amount!
June 4th, 2008 at 11:15 am
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/06/education/06philosophy.html?_r=2&scp=1&sq=philosophy&st=nyt&oref=slogin&oref=slogin
June 4th, 2008 at 11:16 am
Electrical Engineering!! chicka chicka yeah! i have enough money to send my great children to any ivy college!
June 4th, 2008 at 11:18 am
Sociology too.
But hey, if you continue in school after getting your Bachelors in Sociology to get some credentials,
you could get a really great job in a halfway house or an old folks home flipping old people for $8 an hour.
eventually you may make it to manager, at $9 an hour.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:20 am
Tip: Wait to declare your major before you can find some low paying internship job in a field you think you’d like. Then use the cash you earn during school and summers to cover for your barely full time or 3/4 time education schedule. (Which makes it easier to hold your job) Pay your way through college, finish in like 5-6 years, but you’re debt free and chock full of real-life work experience! Plus you probably have a job or two waiting for you! (I did it
)
P.S. Computer Science has so many openings right now if you have no idea what to go into…
June 4th, 2008 at 11:21 am
Funny, not very well thought through though.
The philosophy majors (at my university at least) make more money than any other major 5 years after graduation.
Philosophy majors go to law school, and teach philosophy.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:26 am
I’d say something like 60% of undergrad degrees are worthless. Social work, nursing and a few others can lead directly into a field related to your major, but most high paying jobs require more than a BA - unless you’re really lucky.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:31 am
“Physics is turning out to be a pretty lame degree, too. Engineering would have been half the work and twice the money.”
Uh, what are you smoking?
Also Physics majors tend to apply for graduate school and medical school, in fact per capita physics majors usually do better on the MCATs when applying.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:33 am
“I like how people still think it matters what kind of undergraduate degree you get.
Guess what guys: you’re all morons.”
Yes, because any jackass can apply for dental school with a philosophy or history degree. Psh.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:34 am
So, not sure I agree about communications. That was my degree and in the past 8 years since graduating I now earn six-figures (and that’s in a small rural state). Helps not to be stupid and honestly, most employers hire the person and train them. Degree doesn’t matter as long as it’s from a real university and you’re not a creep.
Others were funny. Though the religion majors I know work for the government in various foreign occupations and as far as philosophy, i’ll have to think about that.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:38 am
All your degree shows is how trainable you are, most of the degrees on this list show that you are not very trainable and for the most part to lazy to get a real degree that dose something useful for society. And yes, I to can do a google search for “famous majors” and come up with a hand full of name of people that got that degree and made it, wow your degree still sucks and you are still lazy!
June 4th, 2008 at 11:38 am
kinesiology baba, PE
June 4th, 2008 at 11:40 am
“There are two types of students. The “smart” ones that spend all of their time studying, wasting hours of their lives reading every page and memorizing every fact and then the “intelligent” ones who drink/smoke/party more than just about any other group on campus and still take home the scholarships, top grades etc. - the difference is the second group has the system figured out. They know how it works, and make it work for them. ”
… You’re kidding me, right? If you want any kind of success in grad school beyond your half-assed barely-passing degree from Ass Science University (ASU) - and grad school is the one which actually matters since that’s where professional education comes in - then drinking/smoking/partying all the time is not going to get you the fuck anywhere. It’ll get you to fail graduate school, medical school, or any other type of higher education worth a damn.
Yes, any schmuck with some loans and an average SAT score can go to college. The difference is, once in college, unless you take your education further and actually get somewhere, it means absolute jack.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:40 am
This article is ridiculous. Any major is the same as the next, it’s what you do with it. Many of the majors listed here are in fields that are always looking for young hotshots and have huge opportunities for wealth or easy living if leveraged correctly. Cultural jobs in particular are of much higher demand then people realize, and many of them cannot be outsourced!
A major is only worthless if you do nothing with it, the world isn’t going to hand you the perfect job after you graduate you have to earn it–no matter what acronyms your diploma has.
It’s pretty obvious that you didn’t actually research any of the job fields related to these majors and instead just spouted your cliched opinions. Classy. Another win for the blogosphere.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:47 am
Uh, the last three seasons of Lost were bad ass.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:49 am
So glad I dropped out of high school and learned how to hustle and make my own money. I’m not independently wealthy and have a few college grads taking shit from me. Life is sweet.
Have fun with those useless degrees, suckers!
June 4th, 2008 at 11:50 am
Double major…. (theology, communication with minors in photography and journalism) ….earned from six different colleges or universities in two countries over the course of a 16-year military career.
Now I am director of marketing and IT for a small company in the small town I grew up in…thank God the Army paid for most of it.
Interestingly, I can earn more playing poker and selling books I’ve written than my day job creating advertisements, websites or fixing computers.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:51 am
Yeah, you’re right. political science is useless, even though it is the most popular major for people that go to law school, and philosophy comes in handy if you ever want to debate anyone about anything. Yep, sounds pretty worthless.
It is especially useless if you ever want to become an elected official, score some awesome contacts, study military science, understand contracts, etc.
The largest group of employees in the world receive their paycheck from the government. And if you’ve never worked for a political campaign, you probably don’t know how much money you get to play with.
But i’m majoring in International Relations as well, so i plan to go to ride the wave of globalization that leaves single language com and business majors working for Target distribution.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:56 am
A.B.
Seems the system is working out nicely for you, since you obviously have a great deal of free time on your hands at 10am on a Wednesday, when most people with jobs would be at work. I am still in school, which is why I was able to waste 15 minutes of my life reading this, but you are apparently working at the “#3 Commercial Real Estate Brokerage Firm in the nation”, which makes me question why, if you have such a lucrative job, you aren’t actually doing any work.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:57 am
@mcsued: my god your right, the guy that gave me my food and Taco Bell had a degree from the above list, wow how could we have all been so closed minded enough to think that these people cant get jobs, you know it just hit me the guy that picks up my trash as a Philosophy degree. lets face it college is not what it used to be, for most students its a party on the parents/governments dime.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:58 am
i like what rambling dad said. i have an MBA and a BS in Decision Sciences from a TOP business school. i have two boys. 11 and 8. i owned my own multi million dollar company.
i am STRONGLY encouraging my kids to study whatever they want, as long as they enjoy it and learn lots of cool stuff. any of the majors would be fine with me.
business degrees are essentially pointless. they cant teach you anything in business school EXCEPT accounting, finance and econ (which isnt really a biz school major) that is at all usefule in the real world
normally, i find you on point and funny. however, you clearly are showing your age with this one. especially dance. i took some dance and dated all the hot chicks. including my teacher.
any of those majors sound great. you can always push pencils in some corporate CUBICLE job. doesnt take much to goto powerpoint meetings and look at excel spreadsheets.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
I was a Communications grad in 04′ from a Liberal Arts school and just hit six figures working in advertising. Good thing I wasted my time pursuing that degree.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:09 pm
I checked this list because I thought the degree I’m going for would be on here. My current goal is a B.A. in Japanese with a minor in business. To the people who dis political science and philosophy majors, they are moderately useful. A four year degree is useful regardless of what it’s in but yes, some are worse than others. Philosophy majors can, theoretically, get jobs working in federal law enforcement. Film is something you shouldn’t have to go to school for, either you’re good at creating films or you’re not.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
You forgot Hospitality Majors. They get credits for drinking and partying and their only hope for a job is hotel manager which are held onto tooth and nail.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
now i dunno what to do for collage D:
ok how about majoring in chemisrty i like making things blow up
i wanna do sumthan with animals like a vet…what would a major in then??
im so confused now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
June 4th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
I know for certain that religion majors are in great demand through out the world. Especially majors in Islam.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
come on Im going to study ICT in NL. Theres going to be 12000 too few. Now, i get an awesome salary, a hot car, and I am even allowed to get a game and if the job sucks I can threated with quitting XD
what else do u want? a flirting class? good chance the boss would provide it by then
June 4th, 2008 at 12:16 pm
This is why people in Europe actually enjoy their lives, have lots of time off to travel the world, enjoy better sex lives, eat great food and drink wine with friends until late into the night, etc.
Americans are duped every step of the way from cradle to grave. From kindergarten onwards, it’s all about pledging your allegiance to the flag, taking tests, obeying authority and becoming an unthinking cog in the chariot wheel of the well-connected elites who rule over you in business and government.
Keep sucking it for pocket change with little time off to relax or get to know your own kids and then think about how good you got ass-raped from your vapid American culture while you waste away with cancer on your death beds.
Also, I lol’d hard at all the butt hurt comments on this page written by people who were too overeducated to know when they were getting trolled by a blogger with a sense of humor.
Be proud of yourselves, losers!
June 4th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
Computer Science is the way to go right now. I just graduated in April, and I’m making 80K/year, as are nearly all of my friends, who were hired either before they graduated, or directly thereafter.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:18 pm
lol… lmao… LMFAO!!!
That was funniest thing I’ve read in YEARS!
June 4th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
My man Bartus Wabacus list 12 succesful philosophy majors and says that philosophy is a good major. Someone must not realize how many people graduate with that degree. Those 12 people probably make up .00001% of the number of people with a philosophy degree.
Electrical Engineering all the way.
P.S. Who ever say they are a civil engineering major so they dont have to worry is wack too.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
I don’t care who you are, Best majors for practicallity are Business, Accouting, nursing, and Teaching. everything else is a crap shoot!!! I have 2 degrees One in Music production and one in Radio Production and I work as a receptionist and I’m more educated than most radio people…. figure that out. For easy money work for the post office 18 an hour to start!!!! or find a trade job
June 4th, 2008 at 12:21 pm
“# Tickaz Says:
June 4th, 2008 at 7:18 am
I studied 2 years of a 3 years Physics degree before realising it was useless and shit. I now work in “management” at a fast food restaurant”
errrrrmm… I know 2 people who did Physics (straight Physics - in Britain we tend not to do minors but can choose classes from a set list). One is being paid £25,000 ($50,000) to conduct a study WHILE she is doing her Phd. She isn’t even working yet. The other is earning £55,000 ($110,000). He is 26.
Useless and shit?
And to be honest I would advise anyone to go to university, for any degree. Attending it seems to make people a whole lot more mature. They think differently about the world and more independently, they are less prepared to follow the status quo, and it is those people who change the world for the better. I suspect that if there were 280 million graduates in the US, you would not have blindly followed Bush when he said “duhhh yeah there are WMDs in Iraq”. And then voted him in again.
Who can guess whether this guy is a graduate or not?:
“hooligan Says:
June 3rd, 2008 at 6:01 pm
Gaaaaay bro
That had me cracking up!
My brother got a minor in latin and he makes me want to kill him”
June 4th, 2008 at 12:23 pm
Wow. My only aspiration in life of becoming a producer have been demolished
June 4th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
Marketing is the lamest of them all! Just a bunch of Rolex wearing no talents that are riding someone else’s coattails, then comes communication degree; please tell me you have a vagina if you go for that one. Liberal arts are for pole smokers as well.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Try this one:
Vocational Agriculture…otherwise known as Voc. AG.
Kids go to four years of university to learn how to be a farmer like their folks.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
I’m probably just repeating what everyone else has already said but, who cares if your major doesn’t land you a six figure job? If that’s what you’re worried about, then put aside being happy and do everything you can to become a doctor, or a lawyer, etc. However, if happiness matters to you, then do what you like and things will turn out fine as long as you stay motivated.
LOST rocks, the last three seasons rocked my socks off!
June 4th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
The pic of the art history majors is hilarious!!!
I think the most fall back jobs for all these people is actuall call centers or banks. I have met people with everyone of these degrees.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:32 pm
Props for the Dance major at Ball State University. Also equally worthless is the Music Performance major at Ball State… I only made it to a minor…
June 4th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
Agghhhmmmmm.
Ok, to start with, most liberal art degrees don’t amount to much. Heck, most degrees don’t amount to anything if you don’t have initiative. What counts is who you are as an individual and what you do with your degree. I resemble degree #1….Art History. But heck, thats just my undergraduate. My masters in in Museum Studies. I have worked in various art and history museums. I currently serve as the Director for a Historical Museum. Sure, there aren’t plenty of jobs out there, but with dedication and a good work ethic you can make it in the field. And you know what? I feel much better educating the public and preserving history than I would crunching numbers, being a plastic surgeon enlarging womens breasts, or countless other bullshit jobs that result in just being another worker bee. So before you feel all high and mighty, get off your high horse and do something that makes society better.
p.s. Money isn’t everything either. A McMansion and fancy cars won’t make you a happy person. Love, dedication, family, and helping others will.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
The Bible is not in Latin- it’s written in Hebrew, Aramaic, and in Greek.
Try International Agriculture Development
June 4th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
thats strange….i just graduated from Berklee College of Music in Boston last year with a Major in Music Therapy….and my starting salary with the music company i work for is 78K
Maybe you should differentiate people who get the degree and have no fuckin clue what to do with it, and those who have a little vision and drive.
My friend just graduated from Notre Dame with a degree in accounting, and you know what hes doing? Delivering pizzas in Buffalo, NY.
Use your heads, people.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
Sounds like your parents did a fine job of preparing you for the real world outside.
Oh, that’s right, they were too busy ignoring you and anesthetizing themselves with crappy television to forgot how shitty their own work lives are.
To all the kiddies reading this: IT’S ALL ABOUT MONEY. Nothing else matters. Study poetry on your free time after you’ve been paid for doing something the world actually wants. Anything related to biotech, nanotech, IT, engineering and the like are good fields to consider.
If you want to ‘be your own boss’ then see if you can google enough knowledge to start your own small business while you are still at home, mooching off your parents. If you haven’t made your first million by the age of 20, it’s time to pack it in, give up on your entrepreneurial dreams and resign yourself to sucking dick for the rest of your life. So, if you have to suck corporate dick, make sure you are getting paid top dollar to do it (refer to last sentence of paragraph 3)
June 4th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
Got my BA is American Cultural Studies
and Masters in Social Work and I am doing quite fine, thank you very much
June 4th, 2008 at 12:40 pm
i last heard that you could do a degree in golf. don’t think every bachelor in golf could end up as tiger woods. they’ll probably end up as golf ball polishers.
June 4th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Drinking/smoking/sex in college is pointless and stupid. You are there to learn, not to party. You are wasting your parents money, and your own time by doing that. Its a waste of human potential…read a book
June 4th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
Womens studies for sure
June 4th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
I have to argue about the latin thing. We do NOT have all the latin that exists in the world. There are plenty of works not yet found by archaeologists.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
I wonder what major landed you writing for some throwaway website that on diggers know/even remotely care about.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
Great list! As an English major, I totally agree with the English Literature major being useless. The only job you can get is teaching English at a college. And if you are sitting in an English Literature class with 20 people and 1 teacher… well, do the math. It’s HARD to get a job that doesn’t even pay very well. Sometimes I think I might be the only English major who actually wanted to go out and get a job as a technical writer/freelancer, instead of having to “settle” for it while I “write my novel that no one will appreciate because most people don’t appreciate good literature.” Right.
Also, side note, I find it amusing that you have a picture of Mormon missionaries under the religion degree, yet Mormonism has an entirely lay clergy. I.E. There is no such thing as a religion major for Mormons.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
im pretty sure this list is reffering to the value of just the listed degree and not considering graduate degrees. we all know philosophy degrees most liberal arts degrees are worthless by themselves. for all the people who become lawyers or whatever their valuble degree is their law degree not whatever bullshit they got for a bachelors.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
im pretty sure this list is reffering to the value of just the listed degree and not considering graduate degrees. we all know most liberal arts degrees are worthless by themselves. for all the people who become lawyers or whatever their valuble degree is their law degree not whatever bullshit they got for a bachelors.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
I am a Religious Studies major and yes it is the most pointless degree ever. I thought I took the easiest route out but no I have to do a fucking thesis.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:17 pm
I think I have the #1 worthless degree. At St. Lawrence they have the “Liesure Studies Degree” Wha da F___! Rich little kiddies who are gonna live off daddy’s $$ anyway sign up for this valuable learning.
PS: The reason for all these worthless degrees is job security for the professors who would be out of work because there are not enough students capable or willing to take “REAL” courses of study.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:27 pm
Hm…. funny commentary, I was chuckling. But, seriously, when someone complains about these degrees and can’t spell “cue the bitching” correctly, they’re sort of missing the point.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
I had a friend once, that had a degree in CS. He married a woman that had dropped out of college, and wanted to return. She went back to college, got a BA in Medieval Literature, while he worked, (from home, long distance, supporting our customers). But wait there’s MORE. She went on and got a masters in Medieval Romance Literature (while he contined supporting them both). But WAIT theres more! She continued on and got a PHD in Italian Medieval Romance Literature, while my friend worked to make a living for both of them. After she got her PHD, she divorced him, and was hired on at a University, far away, CONTINUING THE CYCLE of teaching stupid classes to MORE stupid students. So the moral is get a CIS degree, so you can emulate John, and support your ex-wife-to-be.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:37 pm
16 Century Dutch Art… that was my major.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:38 pm
Instead of being pessimistic and telling everyone why theyre majors are pointless and how they wont accomplish anything why dont you provide students with productive ideas- majors that are needed or “you” think one will be able to succeed in. College students fret enough over what to do with theyre future and an article like this isnt going to help someone who is unsure of what to do with theyre lives, it will probably just scare them off the path they are on. The truth is that 70% of people out there in the corporate world or job force arent even affiliated with a career that is in line with their degrees. Employers dont look at your degree and say oh, hes an art history major hes worthless to us, what they look for is how that art history major presents himself in the interview, how well they communicate to the interviewer, what that person could bring to the table that someone that might have a degree in that field cant. Theyre are plenty of jackasses out there with buisness degrees that go to apply for a job they are well qualified for and dont get it because of theyre lack of personality, communication, tenacity, intelligence, and so on so forth. It is true that BA degrees dont carry as much weight as they used to, this is mostly in part to the trend of getting a college degree, 20 years ago half the amount of people were graduating with college degrees, this made them more valuable, now that everyone in our generation seems to be getting a degree in something or another a masters degree is much more valued. The point is though that it is the person, the individual that is going to make a difference to the employer, and to their own future, not a piece of paper that says congratulations for sitting in classrooms for four or more years. If you believe in yourself and push yourself and strive to be a successful person then that piece of paper really means exactly what it is, nothing.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:40 pm
College itself is worthless.
Does anyone here actually have a job where their college classes taught them what they needed to know?
June 4th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
This article was poorly researched. I for one am a Philosophy major, and it leads into business, law, politics, and several other career paths.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:44 pm
Bible was written in Hebrew (Old Testament) and in Greek (New Testament).
Try again.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
@ Lauren
Why does everyone always say that? “Money doesn’t buy happiness.”
Bullshit… money may not buy happiness, but owing everyone tons of money because your job sucks buys sadness and despair pretty fucking fast.
Pick something that makes you happy… AND scores you cash.
I major in Information Technology (IT) because I can use a computer and understand how they work etc.
It’s something I’m good at, something I enjoy, and something that will yield a large paycheck.
June 4th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
Actually you can get a major in Klingon, which is about the most worthless thing you can do ever, plus it completely crushes your social status.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:01 pm
Spot on mate!
Fantastic pic selection.
Maybe you will soon have to add to your list the “LESBIAN & GAY STUDIES” from University of Chicago Center for Gender Studies
June 4th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
No degree for me, just need my wits and my Wook pal! LooL361
June 4th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
HAHAHAHAHA!
LOL at Latin picture! You’re evil!
June 4th, 2008 at 2:04 pm
Howard- I was a construction management major so a few of my classes have come in handy, but most everything was learned while I was an intern (which was required in order to graduate) and then on into my first couple years as a full time employee…. but could I have been just as good at my job now without ever going to college? YES… but would I have ever gotten my foot in the door and been trusted to manage multi-million dollar jobs without a college degree… Not a chance in hell..
A college degree will get your foot in the doors and just shows a company you have the ability to learn and enjoy whatever your area of concentration was…. If you majored in art history it showed you are really into art and enjoy it..That doesn’t mean anyone else will care about it or you enough to give you a job though.
Also if you pick a B/S major like Music Therapy is shows employers that you wanted the easy way through college and are going to continue doing as little as possible to get by, good luck ever getting a real job or even a serious interview when anyone who reads your resume thinks your are a slacker who majored in taking the easiest classes possible….
June 4th, 2008 at 2:05 pm
Wow.. Wow are you serious? ARe they simply useless majors because they don’t make you money?
wow.. this is the end of knowledge as once was known…i hope you are being sarcastic.. and not realistic.. since in reality… most “useful” majors.. are pointless majors.. that go and come.. such as accounting, finance.. whereas if you study philosophy you can see where notions of systems came from, and how things came about to exist. but of course.. if you neglected to study philosophy the right way.. and focused on the “supposed” life style of someone studying philosophy you are totally … well that’s your ignorance not mine.. good luck to you.. stay here .. and waste your useless words on a blog… good luck..
June 4th, 2008 at 2:08 pm
A film degree is MUCH for useful than a ton of shit on this list, because it at least teaches you a certain skill set… production skills, cameras, editing, those are actual abilities that are needed some place. Degrees like religion, lit, philosophy, don’t actually teach you to DO anything
June 4th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
Yeah, well the people who take these degrees usually have rich parents and end up working for them.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
No further education is entirely useless. It’s what you take from it that will help you after college, combined with the people you have met who will also, hopefully, be moving on to bigger things.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
I am not a Comm. graduate… but I would not put it in this league… add some management stuffs… comm. major is useful… I second this list 100%…
… man am still laughing about it.. philo is the worst major ever.. I tried taking 3 phil gen ed. in 3 diff terms… I somehow end up dropin it in less than 1 week.
My Top 10 worthless list
Any Religious Studies (kesh moi aass)
Philosophy crap
Any History
Music/Radiation Therapy
Language/Literature (pure English major is imp!)
Anthropology
Theatre/Drama (seats should be limited to 10 per school)
Gender Studies shit
Country Studies [American/Asian/European]
Dance
[Optional]
June 4th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Communications is not the study of how people communicate. It’s marketing and journalism and advertising. It’s the nightly news. I realize that public relations takes into account how people perceive things, but it’s nothing like what this “article” makes it sound like. I’m not a communications major, but I just thought I’d point out that apparently the writer of this list majored in religion and is now dumb.
Also, there are a ton of avenues for an art history degree as well. Not just museums. Restoration, design, business owner, art dealer–all very well-paying if you’re in the right place.
Dance, philosophy and American Studies are all useless, I agree. As well as women’s studies. I mean, WTF? And why isn’t it included on the list?
And film is useful if you can actually get a job in it. Plus, it teaches you a lot of skills that come in handy in other careers so it’s not useless.
But still, any degree will get you a better job than no degree. And English Lit could POSSIBLY get you an editing job, but not likely since you studied reading rather than the English language.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:41 pm
FYI: MOST jobs can be done MOST people, unless it is very specialized e.g. medical sciences or Aerospace science. However, you are missing the main point of education: It is SOCIAL AUTHENTICATION. Once you have received a degree from a authentic university. Its an assurance to society, economy and industry that you have successfully completed a structured system. As such, you can be entrusted with carrying out a responsible job in a responsible organization. DO NOT FOOL YOURSELF BY COMPARING EDUCATION WITH YOUR STARBUCKS STINT! With a degree you will be socially accepted without it you have to seek opportunities in a strip club or gas station or nearest startbucks.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:43 pm
this assumes that the point of getting a university-level education is to get a job. i know that’s not why i’m a philosophy major. sure, i know that there is limited work in my field - basically academia, writing [if you're really good, and it'll probably go hand-in-hand with academia], and some research [i'm working as an intern with a company doing natural language processing research right now] - but i don’t study because it’ll get me a job, i study because i want to learn. and, while i could go to the library and read myself, it isn’t the same as studying under a brilliant professor and having discussions in a group atmosphere.
plus there are always lots of chicks at universities.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Dispite that this is for the most part 100% true, you missed the #1 job to fulfill these majors…TEACHING THEM, lol. Other than that, not much else to do unless you just want to take a class or 2 just to know.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
Even those Mormon missionaries pictured for Religion are smart enough not to pursue religion as a degree. They only do that for 2 years.
June 4th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
My balls bleed at regular intervals and it’s starting to scare me…
June 4th, 2008 at 3:00 pm
I have two communication degrees - Bachelor’s and Master’s.
2 Degrees = 0 Transferable Skills and 2 Insanely High GPA’s.
One of my friends is Art History and Communication, but she actually works for an auction house where her skills both come into play, who knew?
Great list
June 4th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
@ amanda
I know! now what the hell are we supposed to do? what with all these people bashing every degree that sounds slightly intresting. I’m so lost!!
June 4th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
@LOL
you act as though we had a choice in what country we were born in. you can say what you like about americans, the truth is that most of us agree with you. and if you have nothing better to do than bash people for something that we can’t control, then you’re no better than the “vapid americans” you accuse us of being. go back to your filthy rat’s nest and read mein kampf until you choke on some spotted dick, asshole.
June 4th, 2008 at 3:25 pm
How about comparitive lit?
June 4th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
Orale, holmes. You forgot Chicano Studies.
June 4th, 2008 at 3:42 pm
@SS
I completely agree with you “LOL” is a douche bag who is probably an American who is either still in college or recently graduated who did a semester abroad in somewhere like France so now they feel they are the foremost expert on why Americans are dumb and how they are superior due to their four months spent blowing their parents money through Europe..
June 4th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
umass amherst has a major called Turfgrass management.
June 4th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
The communication major is dominated by women these days, so your assertion (+pic) that all Comm majors are drunken frat boys doesn’t hold a lot of merit…
And communication(s) encompasses a lot more than “how we communicate”
June 4th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
You totally forgot both psychology and social work; also, comparative fucking literature.
June 4th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
I just graduated with a degree in organizational communications - I just got a job making 50K a year in the midwest. Of course this is an online article on some no-name website written by a guy who at best, has a degree in journalism, which should be considered one of most worthless majors.
June 4th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
How sad. All these folks with “communications” degrees don’t even realize it’s a communication degree. Wow.
June 4th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
“Thanks to your extensive knowledge of philosophy, you’re now self-aware enough to know that most jobs out there will make you totally miserable. ”
Haha, that’s exactly what I learned from studying philosophy.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:02 pm
I’m in aerospace engineering…probably one of the most useful degrees…
….i feel special…
June 4th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
Religion is the most worthless major? Certainly not.
1) Go to any village/town/city in the country. How many houses of worship do you see? Even a small town of 2,000 has at least 5 churches usually. Being a pastor/priest/rabbi/imam or whatever may not have the highest starting salary (although some churches pay a lot), but the side benefits are usually great. Often there is free housing and food, and there are always lots of side jobs doing weddings a funerals. Plus, clergy get great tax benefits.
2) Skills used in Religions Studies (Critical thinking, cultural sensitivity, leadership, psychology) are very useful in the workforce just about anywhere. Knowledge of comparative religions or a specialty on one religious tradition is useful for any job that involves working with people or communities. As such, Religious Studies majors are often sought for corporate or government work in dealing with cultural issues in diplomacy or business development.
3) College is more than just training for one’s career. While that is certainly part, what type of person one becomes is much more important than just what one earns in a job. If a person is better able to sift through the more meaningful questions of life (or the afterlife) because of their college major, then that is certainly time well spent. After all, if one achieves salvation/enlightenment/good karma/whatever then it really doesn’t matter in the long run what one earned. More than that, becoming a better person/spouse/leader/lover/friend/thinker will help one in any career.
So I would certainly disagree with this list. Degrees like philosophy and religion are far more useful than some might think.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:06 pm
@Sean
Hey… I got a journalism major and ended up making more than $60K out of college. worthless my ass.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:07 pm
um you forgot the most useless major of them all
jazz studies
i mean come one you go through 4 years of learning jazz just so you can improve better than the the old homeless guy that plays on the streets but will still make more money than you
June 4th, 2008 at 4:08 pm
Dude you have no idea what you are talking about.
Art History: You could also be a professor, teacher, artist, or even work in the movie industry
Philosophy may not have a crap load of careers but you could be part of a think tank which pays a lot. Also, seeing as how very few people in this world seem to REALLY think, everyone could use a class in philosophy.
I am not going to go into detail about all of you “useless” degrees the only ones I agree with are dance. Latin isn’t that useful but it will help you understand almost every language besides Chinese and other Asian languages.
Also no matter what your degree is in employers are far more likely to hire someone with ANY degree.
Also, if you are just kidding around with this, try to think of some obviously useless degrees like Scooter Engineering or something.
Also to all you who hate America, our current leader is a retard because everyone in the south are retards, if you look at what America is actually supposed to be, free of tyranny and oppression and the right to speech and the rest of the constitution we are one of the best nations out there. Maybe our future leader will fix all of the problems Bush and Reagan made.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
If you look closely you will realize the only way to secure yourself into a good career is to be A. Good shape, attractive B. Fun. Degrees are for those that don’t exceed in any of these two categories, and for companies that need to look like they only hire “professionals”. Anyone who can read and comprehend language can learn the crap you’ve “mastered” and do a better job at it probably. What matters most is does the company A. have enough ethnic diversity and social stereotypes and B. hot bitches(bitches can be men too) they wanna bend over their desk.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:13 pm
of course the most succesful ppl u kno are high school drop outs eliot. ppl who have finished school rarely work at k mart
June 4th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
reading the comments has been more interesting than reading the blog entry. thank you internet.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
The communication major is for idiots. It is for the whores, drunkards, and athletes. Most of the athletes at my school are COMM majors because they have to major in something, and they choose COMM because it is the one major you will never have to buy books for because everything is common sense.
On second thought, they probably do buy the books because most COMM majors can only get into college because they can throw/catch a ball.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
Wow! You’re so savvy and clever. Especially about the “real world.” Wow!
June 4th, 2008 at 4:24 pm
The picture you used for this article is of my friend Stuubs (on the swing) and I (handsome brown guy in the corner). We were English and History majors, and prob. dedicated more time building that rope swing then going to class (sober). So, whatever, this argument is a waste of time, what matters is how much you got away with……
June 4th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
The only reason why the writer is writing this article, coz he/she is probably a college drop-out and will never every graduate college that’s why the sour grapes bashing .. duhz! So just stop bitching already gosh! Grow up!
June 4th, 2008 at 4:32 pm
Let us continue validating our degrees by saying how much money we make!
June 4th, 2008 at 4:33 pm
One summer I worked at an oil refinery on a maintenance crew. Me and another guy would usually end up working on the same job together most days.
I was just out of high school about one month before. He was much older and wiser (probably 24) and I often asked him for advise about how to better myself now that I was an adult and out in the real word.
One very hot August day while we were cleaning the scum from the bottom of yet another deadly substance storage tank I finally I asked him about his situation.
“I got my English Lit degree last year”.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:36 pm
“I have to argue about the latin thing. We do NOT have all the latin that exists in the world. There are plenty of works not yet found by archaeologists.”
If they haven’t been found, how are you so sure?
June 4th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
Interesting thing. Getting bent out of shape over an article on a web site. What would have cleared up a lot of this mess would have been a definition of what “useless” means. My opinion of what the definition of useless would be for this article is that the chosen degree does not produce tangible qualifications and abilities. While you can learn a lot at University or College, there is also a lot to be gotten from actually working. I am currently in my second year of Mechanical Engineering, but before that I worked as an apprentice in a welding shop. If you really want to make serious money, become a plumber. $78 000/yr CDN starters, with benifits, Master Plumbers and Foremen can run into six digit territory. Job security out the ass too.
P.S. I know a Philosiphy major. Her name is Roxxxane, and she can do the splits while doing a handstand. She’s fantastic.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
Yea, Yea–old news! But here is the truth of it, a number of these majors deal with thinking, which is really out of vogue these days. Whatever major you have stats suggest that in 5 years you have less than a 50% chance of working in you major field. So why not learn to think. Stupid is as stupid does. Here is an interesting fact; Philosophy Majors score the highest in the LSAT, GMAT, and GRE. What to go to law school, you’re probably going to get into a better school if you are a philosophy major. Even med schools are showing a preference for philosophy majors. Of the areas that applied, philosophy majors had the highest rate of acceptance into med school. So, move on from the old stereotypes and quit supporting the continued dummying down of America. Think about it, do you really want the people who run thing to never have had ethics or logic. Oh well, ignorance help Jay Leno’s on the street interviews entertaining.
June 4th, 2008 at 4:45 pm
talk about allah like that again and ill put a fuckin jihad on ur ass
June 4th, 2008 at 4:47 pm
“Even though I’m a film major, I’m not in the least bit offended by #2… Because it’s true! Most student films suck more than Boondock Saints. Now cue the bitching.”
my name is scott, and i’m a pretentious asshole… I hang out at starbucks all day name-dropping references to obscure “arthouse” films…
Seriously… STFU… be a man, grow some balls, and realize Boondock Saints kicked major ass and developed quite a large following…
June 4th, 2008 at 4:52 pm
I actually prefer to hire folks with these ‘worthless’ degrees. Saves me the trouble of un-learning all the stale and impractical technical skills that other grads pick up from their out-of-touch profs.
Candidly, even ‘applicable’ degrees are essentially worthless: I’d hire someone with one year of experience in my field, regardless of their major, in favor of someone with an appropriate degree.
June 4th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
I majored in jazz studies for a year. Hahaha. Honestly though, all the people I know who finished the degree make good livings now. I went on to get a BA in archaeology. Again, this proved useless for me. And again the people I went to school with are all doing great and starting PhDs in the fall.
So I’ve come to the conclusion that the problem is me. Thank goodness my husband has a sensible engineering degree.
June 4th, 2008 at 5:08 pm
I studied film in the school of Communications at UM. I was a PA for many decent TV shows a bit, which is a prerequisite for any entertainment industry job. Sure, I went into production accounting because of the higher demand and now I do corporate TV production finance (budgets, etc).
Admittedly, I don’t use most of the technicalities I learned in film school, but without the degree, I may not have been hired. And most of what I did learn has been more than valuable to me. Many of the basic film and video rules apply to the web & graphic design (I now do on the side).
June 4th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
BTW, I’m a 27 year old assistant who makes 40k+
June 4th, 2008 at 5:20 pm
The Bible wasn’t written in Latin. It was written in various ancient languages, like Hebrew, Aramic and Greek (in the New Testament). It was later translated into Latin, and then into English.
Ignorance galls me.
June 4th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
most lawyers are philosophy or english lit or communication majors.
your list is totally wrong.
a bachleors degree isnt for getting a job its for going to professional school (MBA, Law) or for grad school (PhD Philosophy, PhD in Math, etc)
your way of thinking is off your an idiot
June 4th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
Me? Scored a trifecta! Interdisciplinary Degree: English, Philosophy, Bible! Woo Hoo!
June 4th, 2008 at 5:29 pm
I would just like to point out that I have a Philosophy degree and my foreign language was Latin. I am currently flying helicopters for the US Navy making about $90,000 a year. With my “worthless” degree I am still trusted to fly a $20 million dollar machine that is capable of launching missiles at stupid bloggers!
Despite my rather unusual case, I would have to agree that most of those majors don’t have many practical applications. However, there was a time when education was about a lot more than how much money your degree will earn you in the “real world.”
Also, if it weren’t for communications degrees, a lot of college football players would be screwed!
June 4th, 2008 at 5:36 pm
My classics degree hasn’t helped me much
June 4th, 2008 at 5:42 pm
Liberal Studies…really anything with “Studies” in the title. I just had this conversation today with someone- the only practical degrees are business, engineering, or a bs for a pre-med.