College is a great place to learn and have fun. But let’s not kid ourselves, some degrees are as useless as the plot in a Michael Bay film. Here’s a list of 10 degrees that may be interesting, but do jack shit for you in the real world.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: With an art history degree you could maybe curate an art gallery or work at a museum or….yeah, that’s it. That’s all you can do. And seeing as how every art gallery and museum I’ve ever been to has exactly one dude sitting quietly at a desk reading a New Yorker and eating a food that requires chopsticks, I’m going to go ahead and assume there’s not a lot of positions open in the field. That means you’re going to have to venture out into the corporate world. And let me inform you, when you’re interviewing with Bob from the HR team at Wal-Mart who’s wearing a tie that has the twin towers smoking with writing underneath that says “We Will Never Forget,” your art history degree says to him “I’m a commie a-hole who thinks I’m better than guys with 9/11 ties.”
What Job You’ll End Up With: After your parents boot your ass from your bedroom to make room for anything that’s not your bedroom, you’ll wander towards the nearest coffee shop and get a job there, which will allow you to meet artists who will thank you for allowing them to put fliers by the cash register that inform people of their upcoming show that touts “the combination of art and flute.”
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: This isn’t ancient Greece: No one is going to pay you money, or allow you to sodomize their attractive son, in exchange for your knowledge of existence. Never has there been an employer who’s said “Man, we’re having all kinds of problems, I wish we had someone on our team who could reference and draw conclusions from the story of Siddhartha that would pull up our fourth quarter numbers.” I took many philosophy classes and it involved reading and smoking a shit pile of weed. You don’t need to pay 20,000 dollars a year to do that. All you need is twenty dollars and a library card.
What Job You’ll End Up With: Thanks to your extensive knowledge of philosophy, you’re now self-aware enough to know that most jobs out there will make you totally miserable. So most likely you’ll wait tables part time and hope someone starts paying you for the bi-monthly entries on your blog.
Why It Won't Help You Get a Job: If you're not named Achmed or Bjork or G'Day Mate this isn't a degree, it's the last 18 years of your life. If you really want to study us you don't need to go to some stupid class, you need only to sit back and watch a two-hour block of Must-See TV to understand The American. After doing my own research, it seems that this mysterious creature is a pot-bellied humanoid with a hot wife and bad credit who has a penchant for low-calorie beer, Chilis, Applebees, TGIFridays, Denny's, McDonald's, Taco Bell, Dave and Busters, Steak and Shake, Chilis (again) and Red Lobster. Oh and he can totally demolish a White Castle Crave Case in, like, 20 seconds. OK, now give me my degree.
What Job You’ll End Up With: To take your American Studies degree one step further, you will be qualified to do 40-50 years of “graduate work” cleaning tables and taking orders at a Chilis, Applebees, TGIFridays or Red Lobster. Or possibly Denny’s.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: I didn’t even know this was a major until I found it on the Appalachian State website. According to their actual explanation of this major: “Music therapy is the scientific application of the art of music within a therapeutic relationship to meet the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual needs of individuals.” Which is a big, fancy way of saying “We’ll teach you how to make a mix tape.” I guess I, too, am a qualified music therapist because my “Summer Jams ‘95” tape I made in the 10th grade totally rocked my house party. All my friends told me that kicking it off with Wreckz-N-Effects “Rump Shaker” followed by Coolio’s “Gangsta’s Paradise” totally met their physical, mental and spiritual needs to help them get wasted on my dad’s Schnapps and Drambuie.
What Job You’ll End Up With: After realizing that yoga studios and elderly homes don’t pay people just to come in and set mood music, you’re sadly going to end up putting your degree towards burning a fire to keep warm because you are homeless.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: Go into a communications class on any given day and it’ll smell like dried semen and booze. Reason being, communications is the major for anyone who wants to graduate, but doesn’t want to stop getting totally wasted on weekdays. Here’s the bad news, if an employer is going to hire someone to help decipher how human beings communicate, he’s going to hire someone with the letters “Dr.” before their name, not the person who first checks to see if a class is offered online, then when they find out it’s not, let’s out a “gaaaaay bro.”
What Job You’ll End Up With: You’ll go to several job interviews that turn out to be pyramid schemes, even though at first you won’t realize this and come home and tell your parents, who you still live with, “They said I’ll probably be making six figures in less than a year just by selling these beer cozies.”
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: Despite what “Dancing with the Stars” and “High School Musical” may tell you, there aren’t a lot of dancing jobs out there—so you better be good because there aren’t any gigs for mediocre dancers. Outside of New York City or some crap in LA there is absolutely nothing you can do with a dance degree that doesn’t involve actually dancing for money. And since the Des Moines interpretive dance movement hasn’t really taken off yet, you have a better chance landing a job as an 8-Track repairman or a member of the Beatles.
What Job You’ll End Up With: After moving to New York and trying out for Hello Dolly! or Damn Yankees or any of the other seven Broadway plays that want dancers and not landing a single one because you got your dance degree from Ball State, you will find ample opportunity to show off your choreographic skills at one of the city’s many strip clubs. You’ll just need to change your name to Crystal or Bambi and you’ll be able finally live out your dream as a dancer. (Mom and Dad will be so proud!)
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: If someone can spend a weekend with a box of Cliff’s Notes and have only a slightly less conversational knowledge of what you spent 4 years studying, you probably don’t have the most employer friendly degree. Having an English Lit degree is like being a member of the Kansas City Royals: No one cares and the best you can hope for is every once in a while someone buys you a beer because of it.
What Job You’ll End Up With: You can read and comprehend, so that gives you an advantage over 99.5% of the people that peruse Craig’s list job listings. Therefore, you’ll most likely end up landing an entry level position at a random small company, or showing up to your interview and being raped repeatedly by a group of masked men.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: Not only does no one speak this language anymore, but we already have all the Latin that exists in the world. There’s no new Latin that’s hot off the presses that needs immediate translating. I’m no business major, but majoring in a language that doesn’t exist anymore doesn’t sound so good for job security. And I’m sorry to break the news to you, but the world doesn’t need someone to translate The Bible or the inscription on the side of a Post Office or El Loco Latino’s “Latin House Party.”
What Job You’ll End Up With: Since you majored in something that doesn’t exist, you’re going to have two jobs. Your first one will be as the annoying pretentious guy who gives everyone the Latin etymology of every big word he hears at every dinner party he attends. Your second, and most lucrative job, will be as a Subway Sandwich Artist.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: No one in hollywood gives a shit that you made a short film about an alcoholic albino that discovers the meaning of life through the help of a retarded child. Unless that retarded child was played by the son of Harvey Weinstein, your film or degree will be as pointless as the last three seasons of Lost
What Job You’ll End Up With: If you’re lucky, you’ll have an uncle who can get you a job as a production assistant on CSI Miami, where your time will be spent making coffee runs and finding whores that will let David Caruso pee on them.
Why It Won’t Help You Get a Job: Sorry God, but a major in Religion is about as worthless as St. Brice (The Patron Saint of Stomach Aches.) Even Duke University can’t put a solid sell on this degree: “A major in religion offers intellectual excitement and can be a pathway to a liberal education.” OK, you sold me. So now I get to shell out about a hundred thousand dollars so I can know what to wear to a Shinto ceremony and learn how many virgins Allah will give me if I blow myself up in an Israeli square? If it’s OK with you, I’ll keep my money and stick to my sinning-a-lot-now-and-repenting-on-my-deathbed plan.
What Job You’ll End Up With: This one is tricky. On one hand you’ll probably end up working behind the desk of a Christian Science Reading Room. But on the other, you may end up with everlasting peace and spiritual enlightenment. Let’s call it a draw.
Who needs a job? I'm a 12th year senior at a major university, working on my fourth major, and I say they're all worthwhile! Life is sweet when you are living the high life man!
Maybe I missed the mark but I didn't find this funny at all really. Maybe it's because I'm in college and hear this shit all the time and this really wasn't original. Maybe it's because everyone knows you're not paying for education in college. Sure, you learn stuff, but you go to college to say you went to college and haven't just been supporting yourself off your blog for the last few years. For the most part, employers don't care what your degree is.
Does it mean anything? Everyone looks so busy.. I'm not sure if they're actually doing much of anything though, spinning in hamster wheels everywhere? Slowly inching forward? Snails in the rain. What are they trying to accomplish? How can people stand doing the same thing every single day, over and over and over for years on end? Years of learning all kind diverse subjects and now you're supposed to just fixate on one single thing and that's supposed to define one's life and identity? That's the sticker you're supposed to slap on your shell. I still can't figure out what my thing is. It's maddening insanity and very expensive. Why not just go to the library if you're curious about something? Or figure it out yourself? Why does everyone think they have to go to college? I wish I hadn't. They brainwashed me so hard in school like that was the only option. I was very serious and they praised me for that. I should have played more and chased cute girls. After six years I just couldn't stand it anymore, so so boring. I could go through the motions but I felt like I had to scream. Can I get my money back? Pretty crazy. Maybe it's just me that's crazy, everyone else seems happy doing this stuff.
Ok, people who give outliers to these rules: that is what they are, ouliers. The majority of the people with these degrees end up being jokes. Yes, there are successful people with these degrees, but even these slim few generally have continued on to graduate school of some sort. So to the people who list successful people, why don't you add "MBA" or what ever else they recieved after their 'achievement' of a philosophy degree, because that is the only one that truly matters. And to the asshat who talked about his success with a communications degree from ASU, my guess is mommy and daddy gave you the connections to achieve success, not your 'true genius' in knowing the system. In conclusion, this list is pretty accurate, because unless you are an outlier, enjoy your double-wide.
I study Latin and have been for four years. It is an exceptional study that allows you to not only understand an ancient civilization's language but also their culture.
Also, I can assure you that several prestigious Ivy League universities now require a Latin background to enter their Mathematics courses. Why? Because even if Math and Latin are seemingly unrelated, Latin helps enormously in problem-solving and logic skills crucial to advanced Math studies.
Latin may be dead, but it certainly dominated the world for 2 500 years...
You missed Social Work, any ethnic or minority studies and the grandmaster of all parent-pleasers; general studies. That the certificate of attendance of college. You changed your major 14 times and before your parents cut you off, you can say "I graduate this spring."
The other two should have a pre-screening process before you can start in these programs for other sources of income after graduation such as trust-funds, lottery winnings or big boobs (women only) so you can actually pay you bills after graduation.
Defaulting on a student-loan goes hand-in-hand with useless majors.
I'd say that just about any major not related to the sciences, law, and engineering qualify for this list. As for my BA in AMST, it's surprising taken me around the world from Asia to Hawaii and now to Europe. I've since become a teacher and just got offered a position with the Ministry of Ed in Spain to assist with ESL curriculum development. With an AMST degree, the lucrative next step would be to go to Law School which most of my former colleagues did. Otherwise, look into teaching, community activism, professorships, journalism, and/or editing. There are many paths to take upon acquiring this multidisclipinary concentration. So, while it does appear to be "useless," on the contrary it does, in fact, have some value.
I'm not a philosophy major but I think statistics show that they are the most successful at advancing in their careers..I guess probably because they can actually think about how. There is a famous former hedge fund manager, stock trader Tim Sykes who was a phil major...
A degree is nice, but I've known too many educated idiots to be impressed by that alone. In as much as Americans are expected to change CAREERS four to five times in their lives, it seems that the broadest education is the best choice (philosophy, communication, business, education). As a high school drop-out, my only option was to use my street smarts and my love for reading and research to establish a career in commission-based sales. I earn more than most attorneys, doctors, engineers, and fill-in-the-blanks and, as an independent contractor, I have TONS of freedom. I can even fire my clients if I don't like them -- I'll just go out and find others. I can also hold my own with the degreed in conversations about politics, the economy, religion and human response. That noted, I regret not having the opportunity to go to university. The idea of the whole experience is to LEARN HOW TO LEARN. As Tofler wrote: "The illiterates of the 21st century won't be those who can't read or write, they'll be the ones who don't know how to learn, unlearn, and then relearn."
Have to disagree on Philosophy and Religion, mostly because they are such useful majors in preparation for postgraduate work. Philosophy is excellent training for law school, as it's all about building arguments. Religion is, of course, probably the superlative major in preparing for seminary. Hey, I wouldn't go into the ministry, but most pastors I know seem quite happy with their choice. Those two don't belong on here--the others are dead on.
Also, in response to many of the posters here, I'd have to agree on General Studies/Liberal Arts. I've taught at four colleges, none of which were low class enough to offer these as majors. Shouldn't be allowed, in my opinion.
Sorry, scratch what I said above.. I had a rough night & was super cranky. Every degree has worth somehow if you can figure out how to apply it.
I wish they'd had more courses on the big picture. I became lost in the fine details till I lost all inspiration. My major was one of the more practical ones. They just kept taking my money driving me further into debt. They really should be more careful what they allow people to go into. No one ever mentored me or asked about my career choices. What sort of jobs I could get with the degree, what the market is like, what a work day is like, male-female ratio of coworkers, if I'd fit in with the culture, etc. I was only 17 when I started college. Hadn't a clue what I was doing. It's frustrating. My own fault though.
Sweetheart, I don't know how you became one of the lucky ones with your communications degree. You just validated this article with your comment about your Latin degree. You got it on the SIDE and it simply aided you in your career main career path.
I also think you shoulda left some time to pick up a stats minor because you obviously know nothing of the law of averages. Most of your COMM majors are on oil rigs or fast food joints. All the ones in your office were most likely the cream of the crop (survival of the fittest...get your bio degree) who have a business background in their life--either by major, minor, or internshipo.
Somewhere down the line--during a hamburger and Chinese take-out night when you're trying so desprately hard to come up with a pamphlet blurb for that pair of Himalayan hiking boots wearing out in your closet--the thought to procreate with a nuclear engineer to increase the success of your potential offspring and make your womanhood complete will cross your mind. In that case, I have left my website as contact information. Don't be shy.
What's up with the Mormon missionaries under the religion degree? I don't know one Mormon missionary with a religion degree. They're still too young to have had a chance to finish any post-secondary education and most won't pursue a religion degree. In fact, I don't think BYU, a Mormon university, even offers religion as a degree. Might want to rethink your picture, they may know their stuff, but most won't have their degrees yet.
My mother has a masters in communications and she works in the PR department at a college. My boyfriend got his degree in communications and he works for Google.
I graduated w/ a BA in Government and BBA in International Business (w/ minors in English, Asian Studies, History, Philosophy, and Humanities) from The University of Texas at Austin. My guiding light in college was to take whatever class that interested me, to pursue its questions and answered vigorously, and let the chips fall where they may. At UT, there is an inscription on the Tower, "The Truth Shall Set You Free." I felt then as I do now that it is critical to be true to yourself; we all only have one life to live. Most of us do not want to be old wondering if we lived the life that we were meant to live.
After college, I worked for one year at a retail store (Dillard's) making $10 / hour, which is what I wanted to do. All my friends thought that I was crazy, and that I was a loser. Many had taken offers at consulting, accounting, and investment banking firms. It was a struggle, and I often had a hard time making rent and / or buying food. But I pursued my intellectual curiosities w/ a passion. Past great leaders from history inspired me to push myself to the limit, because if I did not succeed in bettering myself, I will have less to contribute to a world that has so many problems and risks. Figures such as Martin Luther King Jr., Ghandi, Jesus, George Washington, Buddha, Joseph Campbell, Abraham Lincoln, General Douglas MacArthur, all provided clues as to trusting your instincts and moral principles as the guiding way to one's actions.
I stuck to my guns. I wanted to work at a place that gave me free time to read while at work, and I read all that I could on History, Management, Shakespeare, Philosophy, while getting paid for it (so long as I completed my work tasks). My co-workers wondered what I was doing working there.
I eventually received my Master's in Accounting, also from UT Austin. I did this while working part-time and full-time (or doing internships) as a writer / editor, and auditor / consultant for two Fortune 500s.
While this road was full of difficulty -- after all I could have taken a stable paycheck somewhere with or without regard to the job's compatibility w/ my preferences and nature -- I now feel that I overcame, and that you elevate yourself best when you do something rigorously, that is right for you. And that people should also be measured by their goals in life. A janitor who works hard everyday to support his children should be admired. A stock broker who does the grind to feed his cocaine habit should be talked to, and convinced out of his addiction. Man has ultimate intrinsic value, each of us are special, and we become more divine when we let the unique magic within come to full fruition when we do things uniquely and with good intention. The world can possess and diversity of divinities, because we can be special in different ways. We can be blessed and grateful for a paycheck doing the things we love. Society will pay us to be happy; will pay us to pursue our passions; but that the only requirement is steadfast dedication, hard work, and the courage to deliver to the world valued deliverables from our honest efforts.
For many years in my 20's I did not have a car. But cars, or official degrees, or watches, do not determine your success. Who you are inside, why you do what you do, what you are doing it for, whether or not you have the courage to actualize what you love, these are some of the makings of success.
As I have often told people around me, I would rather have taken a bullet in the head, or in my heart, than to quit my intellectual (and work) pursuits than pursue a steady, stable road that was not right for me. Many people are affected by our actions, whether we like it or not. Our future spouses, our future children and grandchildren, our friends, and all the people we touch, are affected by our choices and actions. What we do, especially when confronted w/ adversity, IS the example. Not words. Our actions are either a warning, or an inspiration to others, in the present or in the future.
At 30, I am currently a Managing Director at an established Investment Bank. This does not define me. All the extreme struggles I went through, overcoming the odds, attempting to help others, trying to be an example to others, are more of the qualities that do. Funny, as a senior in High School I had very bad grades, but these were due to family problems. In high school, I was always getting into trouble. But my mentors, teachers, coaches, friends, random people from all walks of life, and historical figures whom I read about, all molded me and helped me to become a better person. Teachers and coaches, can be very valuable professionals, if they are effective in helping other human beings discover their own magical journey. I owe some of my fortunate turns to them all.
When we learn to rely on the things that really matter -- such as what is inside, worthy goals, principles, etc. -- then we can begin to make positive, sunny moves. I hope that my current role as an Investment Banker will provide plenty of security for my future family (I'm still single), allow me to help charities, etc. But this is just a temporary step, as I will wear the non-profit, volunteer, public servant, and entrepreneur hats along the way in life.
Trust your instincts. Have faith. Be encouraged. Inspire others. YOU are the example. Courage always. Service to others. The best discovery there is, is your own. Manifest all that is good inside you, out into this world. And that is perhaps the best way that you can improve the world, for all of us.
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.” -- Theodore Roosevelt
Bully for the list. My aunt teaches lit, and I couldn't wait to tell her I had chosen lit as my major freshman year...at which point she cried and asked me if I wanted to spend the rest of my life unemployed.
However, there is a fundamental flaw in the thinking behind the list. The lower you are on the list, you can always trump those below you. For example, I have a lit degree....and I make decent money helping others get their Religious Studies degrees...haven't been raped by masked men yet. Although if I was, I could both write a poem about it and critique that poem out of existence.
College is an odd bargain. I feel I have learned so much from my political science classes, but what I have learned is that high energy prices are going to devastate our economy so badly that most college grads will become insolvent and never be able to pay off their college debts. So as I sit there and get my education, I am learning that I probably can't pay to be sitting there to learn.
College degree's may become useless for the corporate moneymaking world, but valuable in enriching citizens so we can more easily form a cohesive society once oil prices take us down. The economy will dictate that we start to relocalize everything, so maybe a Dance major will be good for helping kids become healthy or entertained, perhaps film will be good for documenting social work, perhaps philosophy will be handy in a serious town hall discussion. College in the US requires only a third of our classes to be our major. Simply being well educated will make us better citizens and let us get through this next era of our history.
I still can't figure out what good Latin could be..
- Carl C. Icahn, corporate raider
- George Soros, financier and philanthropist
- Rudi Giuliani, former Mayor of New York City
- Richard Riorden, Former Mayor of Los Angeles
- Robert McNamara, former Secretary of Defense
- John Stoltzmann, winner of the World Poker Open
- Albert Schweitzer, winner of the Nobel Peace Prize
- Phil Jackson, NBA coach
- David Souter, Supreme Court Justice
- Thomas Jefferson, U. S. President
- Stephen Breyer, Associate Justice of the Supreme Court
and....
- Bruce Lee, martial artist and actor
Philosophy prepares you for a life in which you'll need to know how to think, write, and present rational arguments. That can be used in countless fields.
Basically, if you're smart enough to complete this course of study you're smart enough to figure out how to get a good job and make money. The list speaks for itself.
Andrew D. Tran Says:
June 4th, 2008 at 9:57 am
"you completely ig’nant sons of bitches, philosophy is what many pre-law undergrads pursue…"
Exactly my thought. I know two Philosophy majors (from the Seventies) each who went to law school. One became the Managing Partner of a 300 member law firm for the last thirty years and the other is a prominent trial lawyer at seven figures per annum. A major in Philosophy indicates a very keen and disciplined mind that applies to many other less esoteric professional pursuits and serves the educated man well.
I'm now in my late 30's and I now believe that your major in college doesn't mean shit. In non-engineering/science fields, all that matters is who you know and how hard you work. I have a friend with a philosophy degree who is an extremely successful ad exec. Another with a communications degree who is an extremely successful VP of sales at a mid-sized company. An on and on and on...
@ Anorexic Ginger
I was wondering if Social Work would make the list. A friend of mine just withdrew her life savings to take this damn course. Couldn't she put it to better use and DONATE it to a good cause? I doubt you need anything more than common sense (which I think she's sorely lacking) to do social work. And you certainly don't need to uproot, fly to another country and sell your soul for a fricking degree to do it.
How about you all stop bitching and stop trying to defend your majors and accept that its crap. Yes, you can always find someone successful in whatever area you have, but come on, comm is widely accepted as the most pud major there is. I'm economics but I'll admit it's bullshit and I'm just doing it because I don't know what else to do. God you all need to get over yourselves and learn how to laugh.
I think that just the concept of music therapy is just hilarious. From my experience, the music therapy majors are the ones who weren't good enough to get into performance but weren't decent at anything else, so they end up doing this "therapy" thing, the therapeutic benefit of which seems to be the patient's relief at when the "performer" stops playing!
I also think this list is hugely accurate - and hey, I'm a music performance major at a conservatory.
I just graduated from Rutgers University as a Comm major with no minor and landed a 62K/yr job working for Microsoft. This article would have been so much better if the writer actually understood what he was talking about. After all, if he has decided to write articles for a living then he/she may know that journalism isn't the best major either.
I can't believe that people are defending a Communication degree. The whole football team has one of those. Congratulations on coming up with five examples of successful people with one of those. With the millions out there, that's a huge percentage (which you could figure out if you had a useful degree).
I can't believe that people are defending a Communication degree. The whole football team has one of those. Congratulations on coming up with five examples of successful people with one of those. With the millions out there, that's a huge percentage (which you could figure out if you had a useful degree).
As a Student who majored in Communications, the particular aspect you focus on could be the difference between getting a job or not. If you want to go into Film your screwed basically but if you do social science research involving what people watch or how they interpret things you could clean up big time working for advertising firms and other agencies.
I think what this list and the comments should tell people is that pretty much ANY degree at a university is useless in and of itself. You really do have to know how to sell yourself, no matter what degree you are going for, and combine it with real-world skills, real marketable skills. If just getting a job is your goal then you can't simply assume that getting your degree = job. No matter what you're majoring in. There are few undergrad degrees that have a direct career path. Even the hard science degrees often require a masters or better to get to "shoe-in" level. Computer Science might be one, but again, that is something that you can do as a hobby while majoring in something much more interesting.
Ultimately, just remember this: If what you really want is a job, college isn't for you. Go to a trade school, there's no shame in it, just be honest with yourself. If knowledge and fun experiences and meeting a combination of great new people and pretentious assholes, and paying out the ass for it is for you then hoo-ah, college-bound baby.
Also, regarding the Comm major, yes, it is widely regarded as on par with "Liberal Arts" major as equally useless. A General Comm degree is shite. As one commenter said above me, the key is in picking a particular emphasis, general comm will get you squat.
Social Work isn't a worthless degree... I got my degree for about $75,000 total... undergrad and grad together. I went to a state school. Thank you, SUNY. Yeah, I will never make as much as a doctor, but I'm okay with that. I make just over $36,000 a year. I live in a nice apartment, in a pretty nice town. And with this degree I can do so many different things, it's amazing. It's actually a pretty good investment, if you don't mind working hard.
If I had only known 50 years ago that a Literature and Writing major with a Psychology minor was a huge mistake. Well, I didn't know any better, so I took the degree. As a result, I got jobs as a newspaper reporter, columnist, editor and, finally, publisher. This enabled me to buy a home, educate my kids and stay off of welfare. Now, retired, I have fun publishing books which don't have to make money. IMO, it's all what you make it. Good luck, grads and humanities majors!
I think it depends on what classes you tandem with your major courses. Also with a degree you must see the inter workings of all the careers associated with your degree. Most behind the scene jobs are numerous and pay well. I think you have to keep your options open. Learn all the different things you can, so you can bring a unique prospective to a job. Like communications, I think it is best to take psychology and sociology classes to know how people think and how things work. So basically all those core classes you are forced to take in liberal arts colleges may be valuable. Unless you go to trade school, you are not being prepared for a specific job. College is there to give skills so you can apply to different fields. Ultimately, there will be jobs available when you graduate that were not there before. It depends what the economy and the problems that are needed to be addressed.
The Bible was written in Aramaic (an Arabic language) and Kyonic Greek (sort of the street Greek and not the academic language) so no Latin major will ever be asked to translate the Bible for the two specific reasons that a) there was only ONE word ever written in Latin in the Bible [the sign above Jesus' cross] and b) it's already been translated into every world language known.
I don't know this because I'm a Religion major either, I just paid attention in Sunday school.
A friend of mine is a music therapist. She makes $160,000 a year. Not caviar money, but not baloney sandwich money either. I think she's getting by.
I guess there are two big potential caveats* for this article depending on whether you think, as many simple-minded Americans do, that:
1) the primary purpose of a college education is to get a job; and that
2) some keyboard-bound dork who makes $35-lousy-K a year writing a pop culture column for sports magazine on the Internet is qualified to assess the job market for different majors.
(939 Comments)
Twitter
Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
June 6th, 2008 at 05:00 pm
Who needs a job? I'm a 12th year senior at a major university, working on my fourth major, and I say they're all worthwhile! Life is sweet when you are living the high life man!
June 6th, 2008 at 05:15 pm
Maybe I missed the mark but I didn't find this funny at all really. Maybe it's because I'm in college and hear this shit all the time and this really wasn't original. Maybe it's because everyone knows you're not paying for education in college. Sure, you learn stuff, but you go to college to say you went to college and haven't just been supporting yourself off your blog for the last few years. For the most part, employers don't care what your degree is.
June 6th, 2008 at 05:24 pm
Does it mean anything? Everyone looks so busy.. I'm not sure if they're actually doing much of anything though, spinning in hamster wheels everywhere? Slowly inching forward? Snails in the rain. What are they trying to accomplish? How can people stand doing the same thing every single day, over and over and over for years on end? Years of learning all kind diverse subjects and now you're supposed to just fixate on one single thing and that's supposed to define one's life and identity? That's the sticker you're supposed to slap on your shell. I still can't figure out what my thing is. It's maddening insanity and very expensive. Why not just go to the library if you're curious about something? Or figure it out yourself? Why does everyone think they have to go to college? I wish I hadn't. They brainwashed me so hard in school like that was the only option. I was very serious and they praised me for that. I should have played more and chased cute girls. After six years I just couldn't stand it anymore, so so boring. I could go through the motions but I felt like I had to scream. Can I get my money back? Pretty crazy. Maybe it's just me that's crazy, everyone else seems happy doing this stuff.
June 6th, 2008 at 07:05 pm
Ok, people who give outliers to these rules: that is what they are, ouliers. The majority of the people with these degrees end up being jokes. Yes, there are successful people with these degrees, but even these slim few generally have continued on to graduate school of some sort. So to the people who list successful people, why don't you add "MBA" or what ever else they recieved after their 'achievement' of a philosophy degree, because that is the only one that truly matters. And to the asshat who talked about his success with a communications degree from ASU, my guess is mommy and daddy gave you the connections to achieve success, not your 'true genius' in knowing the system. In conclusion, this list is pretty accurate, because unless you are an outlier, enjoy your double-wide.
June 6th, 2008 at 07:42 pm
what about physical education
June 6th, 2008 at 07:53 pm
I study Latin and have been for four years. It is an exceptional study that allows you to not only understand an ancient civilization's language but also their culture.
Also, I can assure you that several prestigious Ivy League universities now require a Latin background to enter their Mathematics courses. Why? Because even if Math and Latin are seemingly unrelated, Latin helps enormously in problem-solving and logic skills crucial to advanced Math studies.
Latin may be dead, but it certainly dominated the world for 2 500 years...
June 6th, 2008 at 07:56 pm
You missed Social Work, any ethnic or minority studies and the grandmaster of all parent-pleasers; general studies. That the certificate of attendance of college. You changed your major 14 times and before your parents cut you off, you can say "I graduate this spring."
The other two should have a pre-screening process before you can start in these programs for other sources of income after graduation such as trust-funds, lottery winnings or big boobs (women only) so you can actually pay you bills after graduation.
Defaulting on a student-loan goes hand-in-hand with useless majors.
June 6th, 2008 at 08:18 pm
Ebonics. I win
June 6th, 2008 at 09:06 pm
very very stupid, it doesnt matter what you study it matters what you have to offer from the beginning, very dumb...
June 6th, 2008 at 09:06 pm
I'd say that just about any major not related to the sciences, law, and engineering qualify for this list. As for my BA in AMST, it's surprising taken me around the world from Asia to Hawaii and now to Europe. I've since become a teacher and just got offered a position with the Ministry of Ed in Spain to assist with ESL curriculum development. With an AMST degree, the lucrative next step would be to go to Law School which most of my former colleagues did. Otherwise, look into teaching, community activism, professorships, journalism, and/or editing. There are many paths to take upon acquiring this multidisclipinary concentration. So, while it does appear to be "useless," on the contrary it does, in fact, have some value.
June 6th, 2008 at 09:19 pm
I'm not a philosophy major but I think statistics show that they are the most successful at advancing in their careers..I guess probably because they can actually think about how. There is a famous former hedge fund manager, stock trader Tim Sykes who was a phil major...
June 6th, 2008 at 09:32 pm
A degree is nice, but I've known too many educated idiots to be impressed by that alone. In as much as Americans are expected to change CAREERS four to five times in their lives, it seems that the broadest education is the best choice (philosophy, communication, business, education). As a high school drop-out, my only option was to use my street smarts and my love for reading and research to establish a career in commission-based sales. I earn more than most attorneys, doctors, engineers, and fill-in-the-blanks and, as an independent contractor, I have TONS of freedom. I can even fire my clients if I don't like them -- I'll just go out and find others. I can also hold my own with the degreed in conversations about politics, the economy, religion and human response. That noted, I regret not having the opportunity to go to university. The idea of the whole experience is to LEARN HOW TO LEARN. As Tofler wrote: "The illiterates of the 21st century won't be those who can't read or write, they'll be the ones who don't know how to learn, unlearn, and then relearn."
June 6th, 2008 at 09:56 pm
Religion is not that useless if you become a priest. Should be replaced with women's studies.
June 6th, 2008 at 10:12 pm
Have to disagree on Philosophy and Religion, mostly because they are such useful majors in preparation for postgraduate work. Philosophy is excellent training for law school, as it's all about building arguments. Religion is, of course, probably the superlative major in preparing for seminary. Hey, I wouldn't go into the ministry, but most pastors I know seem quite happy with their choice. Those two don't belong on here--the others are dead on.
June 6th, 2008 at 10:20 pm
Also, in response to many of the posters here, I'd have to agree on General Studies/Liberal Arts. I've taught at four colleges, none of which were low class enough to offer these as majors. Shouldn't be allowed, in my opinion.
June 6th, 2008 at 11:10 pm
Sorry, scratch what I said above.. I had a rough night & was super cranky. Every degree has worth somehow if you can figure out how to apply it.
I wish they'd had more courses on the big picture. I became lost in the fine details till I lost all inspiration. My major was one of the more practical ones. They just kept taking my money driving me further into debt. They really should be more careful what they allow people to go into. No one ever mentored me or asked about my career choices. What sort of jobs I could get with the degree, what the market is like, what a work day is like, male-female ratio of coworkers, if I'd fit in with the culture, etc. I was only 17 when I started college. Hadn't a clue what I was doing. It's frustrating. My own fault though.
June 7th, 2008 at 02:26 am
@Tara from June 4th:
Sweetheart, I don't know how you became one of the lucky ones with your communications degree. You just validated this article with your comment about your Latin degree. You got it on the SIDE and it simply aided you in your career main career path.
I also think you shoulda left some time to pick up a stats minor because you obviously know nothing of the law of averages. Most of your COMM majors are on oil rigs or fast food joints. All the ones in your office were most likely the cream of the crop (survival of the fittest...get your bio degree) who have a business background in their life--either by major, minor, or internshipo.
Somewhere down the line--during a hamburger and Chinese take-out night when you're trying so desprately hard to come up with a pamphlet blurb for that pair of Himalayan hiking boots wearing out in your closet--the thought to procreate with a nuclear engineer to increase the success of your potential offspring and make your womanhood complete will cross your mind. In that case, I have left my website as contact information. Don't be shy.
June 7th, 2008 at 03:07 am
What's up with the Mormon missionaries under the religion degree? I don't know one Mormon missionary with a religion degree. They're still too young to have had a chance to finish any post-secondary education and most won't pursue a religion degree. In fact, I don't think BYU, a Mormon university, even offers religion as a degree. Might want to rethink your picture, they may know their stuff, but most won't have their degrees yet.
June 7th, 2008 at 03:30 am
My mother has a masters in communications and she works in the PR department at a college. My boyfriend got his degree in communications and he works for Google.
June 7th, 2008 at 06:06 am
I graduated w/ a BA in Government and BBA in International Business (w/ minors in English, Asian Studies, History, Philosophy, and Humanities) from The University of Texas at Austin. My guiding light in college was to take whatever class that interested me, to pursue its questions and answered vigorously, and let the chips fall where they may. At UT, there is an inscription on the Tower, "The Truth Shall Set You Free." I felt then as I do now that it is critical to be true to yourself; we all only have one life to live. Most of us do not want to be old wondering if we lived the life that we were meant to live.
After college, I worked for one year at a retail store (Dillard's) making $10 / hour, which is what I wanted to do. All my friends thought that I was crazy, and that I was a loser. Many had taken offers at consulting, accounting, and investment banking firms. It was a struggle, and I often had a hard time making rent and / or buying food. But I pursued my intellectual curiosities w/ a passion. Past great leaders from history inspired me to push myself to the limit, because if I did not succeed in bettering myself, I will have less to contribute to a world that has so many problems and risks. Figures such as Martin Luther King Jr., Ghandi, Jesus, George Washington, Buddha, Joseph Campbell, Abraham Lincoln, General Douglas MacArthur, all provided clues as to trusting your instincts and moral principles as the guiding way to one's actions.
I stuck to my guns. I wanted to work at a place that gave me free time to read while at work, and I read all that I could on History, Management, Shakespeare, Philosophy, while getting paid for it (so long as I completed my work tasks). My co-workers wondered what I was doing working there.
I eventually received my Master's in Accounting, also from UT Austin. I did this while working part-time and full-time (or doing internships) as a writer / editor, and auditor / consultant for two Fortune 500s.
June 7th, 2008 at 06:19 am
While this road was full of difficulty -- after all I could have taken a stable paycheck somewhere with or without regard to the job's compatibility w/ my preferences and nature -- I now feel that I overcame, and that you elevate yourself best when you do something rigorously, that is right for you. And that people should also be measured by their goals in life. A janitor who works hard everyday to support his children should be admired. A stock broker who does the grind to feed his cocaine habit should be talked to, and convinced out of his addiction. Man has ultimate intrinsic value, each of us are special, and we become more divine when we let the unique magic within come to full fruition when we do things uniquely and with good intention. The world can possess and diversity of divinities, because we can be special in different ways. We can be blessed and grateful for a paycheck doing the things we love. Society will pay us to be happy; will pay us to pursue our passions; but that the only requirement is steadfast dedication, hard work, and the courage to deliver to the world valued deliverables from our honest efforts.
For many years in my 20's I did not have a car. But cars, or official degrees, or watches, do not determine your success. Who you are inside, why you do what you do, what you are doing it for, whether or not you have the courage to actualize what you love, these are some of the makings of success.
June 7th, 2008 at 06:33 am
As I have often told people around me, I would rather have taken a bullet in the head, or in my heart, than to quit my intellectual (and work) pursuits than pursue a steady, stable road that was not right for me. Many people are affected by our actions, whether we like it or not. Our future spouses, our future children and grandchildren, our friends, and all the people we touch, are affected by our choices and actions. What we do, especially when confronted w/ adversity, IS the example. Not words. Our actions are either a warning, or an inspiration to others, in the present or in the future.
At 30, I am currently a Managing Director at an established Investment Bank. This does not define me. All the extreme struggles I went through, overcoming the odds, attempting to help others, trying to be an example to others, are more of the qualities that do. Funny, as a senior in High School I had very bad grades, but these were due to family problems. In high school, I was always getting into trouble. But my mentors, teachers, coaches, friends, random people from all walks of life, and historical figures whom I read about, all molded me and helped me to become a better person. Teachers and coaches, can be very valuable professionals, if they are effective in helping other human beings discover their own magical journey. I owe some of my fortunate turns to them all.
When we learn to rely on the things that really matter -- such as what is inside, worthy goals, principles, etc. -- then we can begin to make positive, sunny moves. I hope that my current role as an Investment Banker will provide plenty of security for my future family (I'm still single), allow me to help charities, etc. But this is just a temporary step, as I will wear the non-profit, volunteer, public servant, and entrepreneur hats along the way in life.
Trust your instincts. Have faith. Be encouraged. Inspire others. YOU are the example. Courage always. Service to others. The best discovery there is, is your own. Manifest all that is good inside you, out into this world. And that is perhaps the best way that you can improve the world, for all of us.
June 7th, 2008 at 06:40 am
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.” -- Theodore Roosevelt
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:27 pm
Double major in History and Political Science
Minor in Economics
Qualified for: Beating you at jeopardy... that's about it.
Law school it is.
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:29 pm
Hey A.B.
You are a blowhard ASU "grad" *cough*cough* whose last sentence reveals you for what you truly are. A douche.
Grats on your degree in douchebaggery!
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:30 pm
Bully for the list. My aunt teaches lit, and I couldn't wait to tell her I had chosen lit as my major freshman year...at which point she cried and asked me if I wanted to spend the rest of my life unemployed.
However, there is a fundamental flaw in the thinking behind the list. The lower you are on the list, you can always trump those below you. For example, I have a lit degree....and I make decent money helping others get their Religious Studies degrees...haven't been raped by masked men yet. Although if I was, I could both write a poem about it and critique that poem out of existence.
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:30 pm
All mental hospitals and many outpatient treatment centers employ art therapist fyi
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:31 pm
Iliad and Odyssey are greek, not latin.
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:31 pm
College is an odd bargain. I feel I have learned so much from my political science classes, but what I have learned is that high energy prices are going to devastate our economy so badly that most college grads will become insolvent and never be able to pay off their college debts. So as I sit there and get my education, I am learning that I probably can't pay to be sitting there to learn.
College degree's may become useless for the corporate moneymaking world, but valuable in enriching citizens so we can more easily form a cohesive society once oil prices take us down. The economy will dictate that we start to relocalize everything, so maybe a Dance major will be good for helping kids become healthy or entertained, perhaps film will be good for documenting social work, perhaps philosophy will be handy in a serious town hall discussion. College in the US requires only a third of our classes to be our major. Simply being well educated will make us better citizens and let us get through this next era of our history.
I still can't figure out what good Latin could be..
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:32 pm
Famous Philosophy majors:
- Carl C. Icahn, corporate raider
- George Soros, financier and philanthropist
- Rudi Giuliani, former Mayor of New York City
- Richard Riorden, Former Mayor of Los Angeles
- Robert McNamara, former Secretary of Defense
- John Stoltzmann, winner of the World Poker Open
- Albert Schweitzer, winner of the Nobel Peace Prize
- Phil Jackson, NBA coach
- David Souter, Supreme Court Justice
- Thomas Jefferson, U. S. President
- Stephen Breyer, Associate Justice of the Supreme Court
and....
- Bruce Lee, martial artist and actor
Philosophy prepares you for a life in which you'll need to know how to think, write, and present rational arguments. That can be used in countless fields.
Basically, if you're smart enough to complete this course of study you're smart enough to figure out how to get a good job and make money. The list speaks for itself.
Keep the faith!!!
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:37 pm
Andrew D. Tran Says:
June 4th, 2008 at 9:57 am
"you completely ig’nant sons of bitches, philosophy is what many pre-law undergrads pursue…"
Exactly my thought. I know two Philosophy majors (from the Seventies) each who went to law school. One became the Managing Partner of a 300 member law firm for the last thirty years and the other is a prominent trial lawyer at seven figures per annum. A major in Philosophy indicates a very keen and disciplined mind that applies to many other less esoteric professional pursuits and serves the educated man well.
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:40 pm
Hey, there's nothing wrong with a communications degree! I've got one. And as soon as I find a job, I'll prove it.
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:42 pm
When I was visiting Boston University, I was told a guy actually got a degree in Vampirology - the study of Vampires.
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:44 pm
I'm now in my late 30's and I now believe that your major in college doesn't mean shit. In non-engineering/science fields, all that matters is who you know and how hard you work. I have a friend with a philosophy degree who is an extremely successful ad exec. Another with a communications degree who is an extremely successful VP of sales at a mid-sized company. An on and on and on...
June 3rd, 2008 at 04:45 pm
@ Anorexic Ginger
I was wondering if Social Work would make the list. A friend of mine just withdrew her life savings to take this damn course. Couldn't she put it to better use and DONATE it to a good cause? I doubt you need anything more than common sense (which I think she's sorely lacking) to do social work. And you certainly don't need to uproot, fly to another country and sell your soul for a fricking degree to do it.
June 7th, 2008 at 08:07 am
How about you all stop bitching and stop trying to defend your majors and accept that its crap. Yes, you can always find someone successful in whatever area you have, but come on, comm is widely accepted as the most pud major there is. I'm economics but I'll admit it's bullshit and I'm just doing it because I don't know what else to do. God you all need to get over yourselves and learn how to laugh.
June 7th, 2008 at 10:16 am
I think that just the concept of music therapy is just hilarious. From my experience, the music therapy majors are the ones who weren't good enough to get into performance but weren't decent at anything else, so they end up doing this "therapy" thing, the therapeutic benefit of which seems to be the patient's relief at when the "performer" stops playing!
I also think this list is hugely accurate - and hey, I'm a music performance major at a conservatory.
June 7th, 2008 at 11:22 am
(Pretentious Stewie Griffin Voice)I majored in Blah De Blah Blah Blah.Im sooooo cooooool..
June 7th, 2008 at 01:46 pm
I just graduated from Rutgers University as a Comm major with no minor and landed a 62K/yr job working for Microsoft. This article would have been so much better if the writer actually understood what he was talking about. After all, if he has decided to write articles for a living then he/she may know that journalism isn't the best major either.
June 7th, 2008 at 02:38 pm
I can't believe that people are defending a Communication degree. The whole football team has one of those. Congratulations on coming up with five examples of successful people with one of those. With the millions out there, that's a huge percentage (which you could figure out if you had a useful degree).
June 7th, 2008 at 02:39 pm
I can't believe that people are defending a Communication degree. The whole football team has one of those. Congratulations on coming up with five examples of successful people with one of those. With the millions out there, that's a huge percentage (which you could figure out if you had a useful degree).
June 7th, 2008 at 03:10 pm
As a Student who majored in Communications, the particular aspect you focus on could be the difference between getting a job or not. If you want to go into Film your screwed basically but if you do social science research involving what people watch or how they interpret things you could clean up big time working for advertising firms and other agencies.
June 7th, 2008 at 03:30 pm
I think what this list and the comments should tell people is that pretty much ANY degree at a university is useless in and of itself. You really do have to know how to sell yourself, no matter what degree you are going for, and combine it with real-world skills, real marketable skills. If just getting a job is your goal then you can't simply assume that getting your degree = job. No matter what you're majoring in. There are few undergrad degrees that have a direct career path. Even the hard science degrees often require a masters or better to get to "shoe-in" level. Computer Science might be one, but again, that is something that you can do as a hobby while majoring in something much more interesting.
Ultimately, just remember this: If what you really want is a job, college isn't for you. Go to a trade school, there's no shame in it, just be honest with yourself. If knowledge and fun experiences and meeting a combination of great new people and pretentious assholes, and paying out the ass for it is for you then hoo-ah, college-bound baby.
June 7th, 2008 at 03:33 pm
Also, regarding the Comm major, yes, it is widely regarded as on par with "Liberal Arts" major as equally useless. A General Comm degree is shite. As one commenter said above me, the key is in picking a particular emphasis, general comm will get you squat.
June 7th, 2008 at 05:23 pm
Bitching:
Boondock Saints is the best movie ever. Even better than Baby.
June 7th, 2008 at 06:05 pm
Social Work isn't a worthless degree... I got my degree for about $75,000 total... undergrad and grad together. I went to a state school. Thank you, SUNY. Yeah, I will never make as much as a doctor, but I'm okay with that. I make just over $36,000 a year. I live in a nice apartment, in a pretty nice town. And with this degree I can do so many different things, it's amazing. It's actually a pretty good investment, if you don't mind working hard.
June 7th, 2008 at 06:44 pm
If I had only known 50 years ago that a Literature and Writing major with a Psychology minor was a huge mistake. Well, I didn't know any better, so I took the degree. As a result, I got jobs as a newspaper reporter, columnist, editor and, finally, publisher. This enabled me to buy a home, educate my kids and stay off of welfare. Now, retired, I have fun publishing books which don't have to make money. IMO, it's all what you make it. Good luck, grads and humanities majors!
June 7th, 2008 at 07:07 pm
I think it depends on what classes you tandem with your major courses. Also with a degree you must see the inter workings of all the careers associated with your degree. Most behind the scene jobs are numerous and pay well. I think you have to keep your options open. Learn all the different things you can, so you can bring a unique prospective to a job. Like communications, I think it is best to take psychology and sociology classes to know how people think and how things work. So basically all those core classes you are forced to take in liberal arts colleges may be valuable. Unless you go to trade school, you are not being prepared for a specific job. College is there to give skills so you can apply to different fields. Ultimately, there will be jobs available when you graduate that were not there before. It depends what the economy and the problems that are needed to be addressed.
June 7th, 2008 at 07:10 pm
The Bible was written in Aramaic (an Arabic language) and Kyonic Greek (sort of the street Greek and not the academic language) so no Latin major will ever be asked to translate the Bible for the two specific reasons that a) there was only ONE word ever written in Latin in the Bible [the sign above Jesus' cross] and b) it's already been translated into every world language known.
I don't know this because I'm a Religion major either, I just paid attention in Sunday school.
June 7th, 2008 at 08:38 pm
A friend of mine is a music therapist. She makes $160,000 a year. Not caviar money, but not baloney sandwich money either. I think she's getting by.
I guess there are two big potential caveats* for this article depending on whether you think, as many simple-minded Americans do, that:
1) the primary purpose of a college education is to get a job; and that
2) some keyboard-bound dork who makes $35-lousy-K a year writing a pop culture column for sports magazine on the Internet is qualified to assess the job market for different majors.
*"caveat" is a Latin word.
Post new comment