Jessica Alba And Cash Warren Bask In Baby Glow

June 8th, 2008 | 05:17 pm

cashalba.jpg

Earlier today we made reference to Jessica Alba becoming a mother, but there's more to the story.  Much more!  Actually, there's not really, I mostly just wanted to let everyone know they named her something stupid.  People.com reports:

Jessica Alba and husband Cash Warren have welcomed a baby girl.
Honor Marie Warren was born June 7 in Los Angeles, her rep, Brad Cafarelli, confirms.

Apparently "Honor" was the name that Jessica Alba suggested, and they decided to go with that over Cash Warren's suggestion of "Ineverhavetoworkagain Marie Warren."

Three or so years ago, "Cash" (I'm putting his name in quotes because I refuse to recognize that name as real name and not something a frat guy gets nicknamed by his bros after he comes up short when trying to pay a hooker), was a director's assistant on Fantastic Four, and now he's not only put his penis inside Jessica Alba, but he's done so without a condom, married her, and now made a baby with her that will forever link him to her money and success.

Now, my first instinct is to bash the living shit out of him because his douchebaggery seems to be not of this world.  Like some kind of alien technology created it or something.  But, if you really think about it, his accomplishment is sort of inspiring.  Like, I almost feel like they should hire "Cash" to speak to cancer patients and be like "I used to get coffee for the dude who directed Fantastic Four.  Fantastic...Four.  And now, I impregnated Jessica Alba upon HER request.  So the next time your doctor tells you it's not looking good....you tell him "Cash" says you're gonna make it."

Anyway, I have a photo from the delivery room.  "Cash" seems very excited.

cashalbababy.jpg

Comments

12 Responses to "Jessica Alba And Cash Warren Bask In Baby Glow"

  1. KG Says:

    I normally dont actually "LOL" ... but I did laugh at this one.. So the next time your doctor tells you it’s not looking good….you tell him “Cash” says you’re gonna make it.”

    Thats classic.

  2. FrogSoda Says:

    Heres to Honor, getting honor and staying honor.

  3. Womit Says:

    Old enough to pee is old enough for me....

  4. imgreatatsax Says:

    If she's old enough to pee, she's definitely old enough for me.

  5. miek Says:

    this turn of events in reproduction is really making me want to change my own birthday

  6. StarLink Says:

    I guess all we can do now is sit around and wait for Angelina Jolie to have her monsters....

  7. Jeanne Says:

    Looks like her head was photoshopped. Nobody looks this good after having a baby. The head looks too big. She must have really looked like shizzz and they had to find a better head shot to replace the after birth shot.

  8. chris Says:

    jeanne..that has to be the stupidest serious comment ever, or a really lame joke.

    clearly this is a fake picture, it wasn't even worth mentioning. obviously nobody thought it was the real "first shot of jessica, cash and the baby"

    your comment annoyed me more than anything else.

    foolish.

  9. mimi Says:

    that picture is a fake!

  10. Rebekah Says:

    mim you're a twat! Of course the pictures fake it's kinda the point. Dur! are you really that retarded?

    But whoever wrote that article is shower!! That was one of the funniest things I've read!

    B x

  11. </a></cite> Says: <br> <small class="commentmetadata"><a rel="nofollow" href="/2008/06/09/jessica-alba-and-cash-warren-bask-in-baby-glow/#comment-597844" title="">May 13th, 2009 at 10:40 am</a> </small> <p>Good evening. Everything of importance has been said before by somebody who did not discover it.<br /> I am from Kyrgyzstan and also now am reading in English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: "Avtovaz has taken a more assertive stance with gm since russian state arms.White papers, case studies, business articles, and blog posts relating to automobile company renault cleared to buy avtovaz."</p> <p>Thank you very much :(. Robyn.</p> <div class="comment_reply_btn"><a rel="nofollow" class="comment_reply_link" href="/comment/reply/1671/597844"><img border="0" src="sites/default/themes/holytaco2/images/reply_btn.png"> </a></div> </li> </div></div> <!-- /comment-inner, /comment --> <a id="comment-1046185"></a> <a id="comment-1046185"></a> <div class="comment "><div class="comment-inner"> <li class="" id="comment-1046185"> <cite> Jenina</cite> Says: <br> <small class="commentmetadata"><a rel="nofollow" href="/2008/06/09/jessica-alba-and-cash-warren-bask-in-baby-glow/#comment-1046185" title="">August 4th, 2009 at 09:44 am</a> </small> <p>lol jeanne and mimi...</p> <p>LOL...almost laughed as hard as when i read the article itself!!</p> <p>thanks for the comedy girls...</p> <div class="comment_reply_btn"><a rel="nofollow" class="comment_reply_link" href="/comment/reply/1671/1046185"><img border="0" src="sites/default/themes/holytaco2/images/reply_btn.png"> </a></div> </li> </div></div> <!-- /comment-inner, 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