Well, apparently our post on how Tila Tequila got famous made the former editor-in-chief of Stuff Magazine a teensy bit defensive. Jimmy Jellinek, the editor that put her on the cover, sent a lovely e-mail to Holy Taco this morning about the post. We didn’t know you were such an avid reader, Jimmy! Here’s the love note:
From: Jimmy Jellinek
To: Cory Jones
Hey Corey go fuck yourself…
Jimmy Jellinek
VP Entertainment and Programming
Heavy.com
Looks like Jimminy Cricket (who now works for Heavy.com) still has a wee chip on his shoulder about all this.
Wow, she should just roll over into porn now before her body gets too used up for it. and i hole heartly agree, worse then crystal pepsi and that shit was nasty.
Heavy huh? That's like mtv on steroids, without some good music and all the crap you've seen hundreds of times, with some extra gravy on it in the form of advertertisements
Looking at the well thought out response from mister VP himself, my comment about heavy suddenly isn't as superficial as it appears to be.
I feel the need to clarify... She may suck more than the Alan Alda era of M*A*S*H, but I would still teach her to fetch. You know, put her on all fours and throw her a bone.
just sayin'.
btw something is funky with the wp-comments-post.php here, telling me I am posting comments too quickly, even with the first one, when I hadn't posted a comment to begin with
Crystal Pepsi kicks the shit out of Tila Tequila. I at least have fond memories of Crystal Pepsi. Tila Tequila is the Nikki Cox of the moment: completely talentless but hot enough for 12 year olds with no internet access to whack off to.
Crystal Pepsi kicks the shit out of Tila Tequila. I at least have fond memories of Crystal Pepsi. Tila Tequila is the Nikki Cox of the moment: completely talentless but hot enough for 12 year olds with no internet access to whack off to.
What the Heck, Jimmy Jellinek
its not our fault youre an absolute wreck,
a blemish, a speck, on the interweb deck.
You surrendered your job for a net-slut's peck.
And some inflated paycheck.
We oughta wring your neck,
What the Heck, Jimmy Jellinek.
You have to carry on your shoulders the knowledge that you, singlehandedly infected the world with the Tila Tequila Virus, and are therefore solely responsible for the somehow popular yet horrendous result that is 'A Shot at Love'.
I don't know about you, but if I had to carry that type of thing around with me, I'm sure it wouldn't take long before it got 'Heavy'.
The writer of this article is really a douchebag. I get the genesis for the Tila article was to get back at Jimmy Jellinek rather than actually explain Tila's status. Most of the article is dedicated to the editor-and-chief of maxim magazine, alternating between sarcasm and mockery, with a casual "...Tila Tequila somehow got famous" thrown in at the end.
Oh, and calling him Jimminy Cricket? Real fourth grade.
jiminy is a fucking moron for unleashing the pure unadulterated shit storm called tila tequila...i lump him in with the group who created the atomic bomb and the person responsible for the macarena...
I googled Jimmy Jellineck, and he DOES IN FACT look like Jiminy Cricket, so that's no lie. The only difference is the Cricket is taller and NOT a douchebag.
tilawearsnopants and findsomeclass i do believe jimbo there worked for stuff not maxim. tila tried to be a 2005 hometown hottie contestant but couldn't figure out how to fill out the proper paperwork. since tila got her start as a mainstream skag through jimmy jellinek, i feel it's proper to give credit where it is due. thus the article is correct in pointing out that this plague called "a shot at love" is jimmy boy's fault. i've not seen him so i really can't say whether or not he looks like a certain disney character. then again, i don't really care. all i can say is that fucking tila tequila is probably like fucking the wound from a shotgun blast....with gangrene.
Heavy.com's entire business model is creating a site that looks like it would be somewhere that a "brand" advertiser would want to advertise and then sending a bunch of bullshit pop-up traffic to the site to justify high prices for the ads ("Hey, we have 3 million "unique visitors" this month, never mind that most of them are randoms that got Heavy.com popped to them against their will"). It's a fairly brilliant if scammy model.
Oh and Tila Tequila is a Vietnamese tranny hooker.
Jellinek: This guy amazes me. Totally botched Stuff Magazine into an unreadable, ADD -esque pile of shit... then moves to Heavy.com to create, well, nothing but spoofs of female-oriented tv shows on a site full of viral video
TIA was actually on a few TV shows on cable before her "discovery" by Stuff, to set the record straight. (still an awful sperm chugger).
Friends in the industry say Jellinek, many years after Tia, still has ZERO grasp of of the internet... asking questions about how Heavy could "email IP addresses" and "have people upload files to the mainframe" in meetings.
I worked with Jimmy... he actually means well and hell, 1 million myspace friends back then was the gold standard that we all jumped on. Very funny that he accidentally christened a star by sheer luck (it is true, he does not know the first thing about the inner workings of the internet or marketing... but who really does besides a select few?).
What does amaze me is that he is still at Heavy after the recent layoffs (google it) with a hefty payola. Godspeed little spoofer.
To: Jimmy
From: Your High School Guidance Counselor
RE: Your Success
Jimmy,
Congratulations on your new job and title. Did you make that one up yourself, or do VP titles not mean what they used to? Regardless, just be careful of helping to run another company into the ground. O-2 doesn't look good on a resume. Then again, it is the so-called "entertainment" business, so, who knows, keep it up and you may be CEO.
Cheers from all of us,
The staff at Central Sacramento Special Education Life Preparation School
Here in the 21st century we are redefining what Hell is. An eternity stuck in an episode of 'The Hills of Tequila' where you are stuck with Tila Tequila and Lauren Conrad. They only want to be your friend, they talk about bullshit constantly and they love to make stupid jaw dropping OMG I crapped my pants face at you. Your only hope is that your eyes fall out and you bleed out of your ears.
I love how she is making a surprised look as she grabs her breasts...
Tila: OMG look at my boobs cameraman!!
Tila's boobs: STFU already... GOD DAMN I'm getting tired of being grabbed and poked and prodded. Leave me be and touch something that no one ever does: your face.
MTV sucks, too. I would drown myself in a swimming pool full of Crystal Pepsi before I willingly watched a tv show with Tila Tequila or Lauren Conrad in it.
I didn't know holytaco catered to homosexual men. Why do you guys even care if some girl gets famous? Only a woman would feel angst towards other women.. or gay men.
I'll say it again, I'd have sex with her in every position possible. She's a bimbo ..but she's quite attractive..her stupidity would make it all the easier to trick her into anal or whatever. Honestly I prefer her to Jessica Biel..which some guys seem to go crazy over..now there's a talentless slut if you ask me. She can't act, she's not even all that attractive..she has this perpetual glazed over look.
(127 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:26 pm
First FOX now Heavy. You're getting pretty big for your britches, Taco.
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:35 pm
Tila Tequila sucks. pure and simple.
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:36 pm
Still pretty cool to yank the attention of these folks.
But Tila Tequila does suck. Worse than Crystal Pepsi
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:41 pm
Well Heavy.com sucks too, so may be the common factor is Jimmy da Clown!
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:42 pm
Wow, she should just roll over into porn now before her body gets too used up for it. and i hole heartly agree, worse then crystal pepsi and that shit was nasty.
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:43 pm
Heavy huh? That's like mtv on steroids, without some good music and all the crap you've seen hundreds of times, with some extra gravy on it in the form of advertertisements
Looking at the well thought out response from mister VP himself, my comment about heavy suddenly isn't as superficial as it appears to be.
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:47 pm
He sounds pretty mad. It would almost lead you to believe he has gotten shit for this before
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:47 pm
Well Jimmy, man up! If you can't take the criticism, your in the wrong business. EAT A COCK!
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:49 pm
I feel the need to clarify... She may suck more than the Alan Alda era of M*A*S*H, but I would still teach her to fetch. You know, put her on all fours and throw her a bone.
just sayin'.
btw something is funky with the wp-comments-post.php here, telling me I am posting comments too quickly, even with the first one, when I hadn't posted a comment to begin with
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:50 pm
Crystal Pepsi kicks the shit out of Tila Tequila. I at least have fond memories of Crystal Pepsi. Tila Tequila is the Nikki Cox of the moment: completely talentless but hot enough for 12 year olds with no internet access to whack off to.
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:50 pm
Crystal Pepsi kicks the shit out of Tila Tequila. I at least have fond memories of Crystal Pepsi. Tila Tequila is the Nikki Cox of the moment: completely talentless but hot enough for 12 year olds with no internet access to whack off to.
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:54 pm
What the Heck, Jimmy Jellinek
its not our fault youre an absolute wreck,
a blemish, a speck, on the interweb deck.
You surrendered your job for a net-slut's peck.
And some inflated paycheck.
We oughta wring your neck,
What the Heck, Jimmy Jellinek.
Thank you rhymer.com
June 23rd, 2008 at 05:56 pm
From: Grundoko
To: Jimmy Jellinek
Hey Jimmy, Learn some grammar.
Grundoko
Game Garage
www.grundoko.com
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:09 pm
From: Mom
To: Jimmy Jellinek
Jimmy, I told you to use your words when you're mad, not be an uber asshole to people that are merely pointing out many of your massive mistakes. FAIL
Grow up, Jimmy. Grow up.
Mom
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:28 pm
Yea she's an annoying idiot that probably has the emotional and intellectual iq of a peanut, but I'd still hit it. Don't lie you would too.
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:34 pm
Yeah of course I would hit it. But I also molested a goat one night after one too many scotches
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:36 pm
Jimmy can go suck on a small Tila tequila dick. And F heavy what ever that is.
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:42 pm
Wow, attention to detail is his strong point, eh, "CorEy"?
Suggestion for people who represent major publications and decide to attack other people for their opinion pieces: At least spell things correctly.
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:47 pm
i'm on the fence about tila... sometimes she's looks like a troll, other times, she's very hot...
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:50 pm
I wonder how many times she blew him to say thanks for making her a "household whore."
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:56 pm
he can't spell, and heavy is the most useless shitty site on the web. he should go fuck himself!
June 23rd, 2008 at 06:56 pm
This kind of feuding is all fun and games until someone gets shot in Vegas.
June 23rd, 2008 at 07:19 pm
So Jim,
You have to carry on your shoulders the knowledge that you, singlehandedly infected the world with the Tila Tequila Virus, and are therefore solely responsible for the somehow popular yet horrendous result that is 'A Shot at Love'.
I don't know about you, but if I had to carry that type of thing around with me, I'm sure it wouldn't take long before it got 'Heavy'.
June 23rd, 2008 at 07:20 pm
Don't Hit That.
June 23rd, 2008 at 07:24 pm
The writer of this article is really a douchebag. I get the genesis for the Tila article was to get back at Jimmy Jellinek rather than actually explain Tila's status. Most of the article is dedicated to the editor-and-chief of maxim magazine, alternating between sarcasm and mockery, with a casual "...Tila Tequila somehow got famous" thrown in at the end.
Oh, and calling him Jimminy Cricket? Real fourth grade.
June 23rd, 2008 at 07:31 pm
jiminy is a fucking moron for unleashing the pure unadulterated shit storm called tila tequila...i lump him in with the group who created the atomic bomb and the person responsible for the macarena...
June 23rd, 2008 at 07:32 pm
btw i wouldn't hit it...she looks like an asian tranny with really bad tattoos
June 23rd, 2008 at 07:40 pm
FINDSOMECLASS:
I googled Jimmy Jellineck, and he DOES IN FACT look like Jiminy Cricket, so that's no lie. The only difference is the Cricket is taller and NOT a douchebag.
Guess he was fired from Maxim for a reason.
June 23rd, 2008 at 08:16 pm
Heavy.com, his own damn site, with a call out to TT's "undeserved" fame.... hypocrite.
http://www.heavy.com/channel/1021
June 23rd, 2008 at 08:22 pm
A response email should be sent saying: "Your defunct magazine worked great for cleaning up after my 'fucking myself' session."
June 23rd, 2008 at 08:23 pm
tilawearsnopants and findsomeclass i do believe jimbo there worked for stuff not maxim. tila tried to be a 2005 hometown hottie contestant but couldn't figure out how to fill out the proper paperwork. since tila got her start as a mainstream skag through jimmy jellinek, i feel it's proper to give credit where it is due. thus the article is correct in pointing out that this plague called "a shot at love" is jimmy boy's fault. i've not seen him so i really can't say whether or not he looks like a certain disney character. then again, i don't really care. all i can say is that fucking tila tequila is probably like fucking the wound from a shotgun blast....with gangrene.
June 23rd, 2008 at 08:25 pm
Heavy.com's entire business model is creating a site that looks like it would be somewhere that a "brand" advertiser would want to advertise and then sending a bunch of bullshit pop-up traffic to the site to justify high prices for the ads ("Hey, we have 3 million "unique visitors" this month, never mind that most of them are randoms that got Heavy.com popped to them against their will"). It's a fairly brilliant if scammy model.
Oh and Tila Tequila is a Vietnamese tranny hooker.
June 23rd, 2008 at 08:39 pm
Jellinek: This guy amazes me. Totally botched Stuff Magazine into an unreadable, ADD -esque pile of shit... then moves to Heavy.com to create, well, nothing but spoofs of female-oriented tv shows on a site full of viral video
http://abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=4560481&affil=kabc (gotta put up with a commercial). Is it just me or does he sorta look like a lisping CORKY? Either mildly retarded or a victim up the shallow JAP gene pool in wherever he's from.
TIA was actually on a few TV shows on cable before her "discovery" by Stuff, to set the record straight. (still an awful sperm chugger).
Friends in the industry say Jellinek, many years after Tia, still has ZERO grasp of of the internet... asking questions about how Heavy could "email IP addresses" and "have people upload files to the mainframe" in meetings.
June 23rd, 2008 at 08:54 pm
I worked with Jimmy... he actually means well and hell, 1 million myspace friends back then was the gold standard that we all jumped on. Very funny that he accidentally christened a star by sheer luck (it is true, he does not know the first thing about the inner workings of the internet or marketing... but who really does besides a select few?).
What does amaze me is that he is still at Heavy after the recent layoffs (google it) with a hefty payola. Godspeed little spoofer.
June 23rd, 2008 at 08:56 pm
Jimmy is missing a comma but other than that how can you not laugh
June 23rd, 2008 at 08:57 pm
To: Jimmy
From: Your High School Guidance Counselor
RE: Your Success
Jimmy,
Congratulations on your new job and title. Did you make that one up yourself, or do VP titles not mean what they used to? Regardless, just be careful of helping to run another company into the ground. O-2 doesn't look good on a resume. Then again, it is the so-called "entertainment" business, so, who knows, keep it up and you may be CEO.
Cheers from all of us,
The staff at Central Sacramento Special Education Life Preparation School
June 23rd, 2008 at 09:06 pm
wow, what a tool. cant even deny the allegations? tila asked me to be her friend along time ago. I denied her.
June 23rd, 2008 at 09:19 pm
I Think she is cute!
She once played at the Asianmodelpalooza Festival and was Great!
http://www.asianmodelpalooza.com
June 23rd, 2008 at 09:39 pm
Here in the 21st century we are redefining what Hell is. An eternity stuck in an episode of 'The Hills of Tequila' where you are stuck with Tila Tequila and Lauren Conrad. They only want to be your friend, they talk about bullshit constantly and they love to make stupid jaw dropping OMG I crapped my pants face at you. Your only hope is that your eyes fall out and you bleed out of your ears.
Oh my God, I just crapped my pants.
June 23rd, 2008 at 10:12 pm
COCAINE!
June 23rd, 2008 at 10:21 pm
What a tool
June 23rd, 2008 at 10:30 pm
From: Crystal Pepsi
To: chris rohde
Hey Chrisrohde go fuck yourself…
Crystal Pepsi
VP Entertainment and Programming
Heavy.com
June 23rd, 2008 at 10:44 pm
Last time I saw JJ was at Piano's getting blown by a tranny.
June 24th, 2008 at 01:03 am
The snowman says hello
June 24th, 2008 at 01:21 am
I love how she is making a surprised look as she grabs her breasts...
Tila: OMG look at my boobs cameraman!!
Tila's boobs: STFU already... GOD DAMN I'm getting tired of being grabbed and poked and prodded. Leave me be and touch something that no one ever does: your face.
June 24th, 2008 at 01:50 am
BOB is so true.
MTV sucks, too. I would drown myself in a swimming pool full of Crystal Pepsi before I willingly watched a tv show with Tila Tequila or Lauren Conrad in it.
June 24th, 2008 at 02:30 am
I'd hit it, mainly because I have really bad self-esteem.
June 24th, 2008 at 03:21 am
I didn't know holytaco catered to homosexual men. Why do you guys even care if some girl gets famous? Only a woman would feel angst towards other women.. or gay men.
June 24th, 2008 at 04:06 am
Sad part is her show will probably make it to 7 or 8 seasons, and compete with Flavor Flav for the bottom rung on the TV ladder.
June 24th, 2008 at 04:13 am
I'll say it again, I'd have sex with her in every position possible. She's a bimbo ..but she's quite attractive..her stupidity would make it all the easier to trick her into anal or whatever. Honestly I prefer her to Jessica Biel..which some guys seem to go crazy over..now there's a talentless slut if you ask me. She can't act, she's not even all that attractive..she has this perpetual glazed over look.
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