Angelina Jolie

July 13th, 2008 | 11:11 am

Age: 33

Where you've seen her: Jesus, Angelina Jolie is just about everywhere. From her new crappy movie about assassins who can make bullets curve to breast feeding every orphan on the Serengeti, if you've been alive in the last five years, you've seen Angelina Jolie.

MILF status: Despite already having adopted 2/3rds of the world's children, Angelina just gave birth to two more. Twins named Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline. The photos of these two new babies are expected to fetch up to $20 million. Which makes total sense, because all babies look really really different.

Pointless quote: "I love to put on lotion. Sometimes I'll watch TV and go into a lotion trance for an hour. I try to find brands that don't taste bad in case anyone wants to taste me."

Comments

6 Responses to "Angelina Jolie"

  1. SillyPutty Says:

    I have never understood the infatuation with this woman.

  2. Pratik Says:

    The last part of that quote isn't so pointless.

  3. Matty D Says:

    "I try to find brands that don’t taste bad in case anyone wants to taste me.” Uhm do I need to line up or take a number? Please direct me to the Angelina Jolie tasting booth?

  4. Buddy Ice Says:

    "...breast feeding every orphan on the Serengeti."

    My god, you've outdone yourself HolyTaco. If I had some old tee-shirts to give away I'd definitely mail you guys one for greatest comment of the year award. And while I'm sucking your asses about how funny your comment is, I'll forget to send you your tee-shirts like you forgot to send me mine.

  5. beefytee Says:

    SillyPutty, that's because you don't have a penis, or you only use it for peeing.

  6. dave Says:

    haha plastic injection molding... nice woman!

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