July 13th, 2008 | 07:44
If I had a nickel for every time I cooked up a great big meal of poison, only to have to throw it away because I read this article reminding me that I shouldn't eat poison...well, I wouldn't have any nickels.
This actual article is a helpful reminder that we need reminding about almost everything. It's pretty clear that nothing is too obvious for us. So, here are a few more headlines that wouldn't look out of place in any of our nation's newspapers:
The Texas Center For Not Shooting Yourself In The Face Doesn't Think You Should Shoot Yourself In The Face
The Center For Homosexual Sex Reminds Everyone To Put A Penis Inside Their Butthole
The New Orleans Department of Getting Hammered Loves To Get Hammered
The Society Of "Please Don't Take A Dump In My Mouth" Would Prefer It If You Didn't Take A Dump In Their Mouth
The Minnesota Cancer Center Thinks Cancer Totally Sucks
A Bunch Of Guys Who Liked The Movie Gremlins Give The Gremlins Movie A Thumbs Up
The Association Of Murderers Wants To Kill You
The Society Of "Please Do Take A Dump In My Mouth" Would Prefer It If You Did Take a Dump In Their Mouths (following up a previous story)
via photobasement
![](mailto:?subject=Utah Poison Control Center Offers Helpful Tip&body=<p><a href='http://cdn.holytaco.com/www/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/utahpoisoncontrol.jpg'><img src="http://cdn.holytaco.com/www/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/utahpoisoncontrol.jpg" alt="" title="utahpoisoncontrol" width="500" height="338" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-2663" /></a></p>
<p>If I had a nickel for every time I cooked up a great big meal of poison, only to have to throw it away because I read this article reminding me that I shouldn't eat poison...well, I wouldn't have any nickels. </p>
<p>This actual article is a helpful reminder that we need reminding about almost everything. It's pretty clear that nothing is too obvious for us. So, here are a few more headlines that wouldn't look out of place in any of our nation's newspapers:</p>
<blockquote><p><strong>The Texas Center For Not Shooting Yourself In The Face Doesn't Think You Should Shoot Yourself In The Face</strong></p>
<p>The Center For Homosexual Sex Reminds Everyone To Put A Penis Inside Their Butthole</p>
<p>The New Orleans Department of Getting Hammered Loves To Get Hammered</p>
<p>The Society Of "Please Don't Take A Dump In My Mouth" Would Prefer It If You Didn't Take A Dump In Their Mouth</p>
<p>The Minnesota Cancer Center Thinks Cancer Totally Sucks</p>
<p>A Bunch Of Guys Who Liked The Movie Gremlins Give The Gremlins Movie A Thumbs Up</p>
<p>The Association Of Murderers Wants To Kill You</p>
<p>The Society Of "Please <em>Do</em> Take A Dump In My Mouth" Would Prefer It If You <em>Did</em> Take a Dump In Their Mouths (following up a previous story)<br />
</p></blockquote>
<p>via <a href="http://www.photobasement.com/a-handy-reminder/" target="_blank"><strong>photobasement</strong></a></p>
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(4)
July fth, 2008 at 01:48 am
i think there's a typo: it should say:
"holy taco reminds everyone to put a penis in their butthole"
July fth, 2008 at 09:22 pm
Has this site turned into some shitty Jay Leno blog?
July fth, 2008 at 08:40 pm
I wish the Michigan Poison Control Center would have issued a statement like this before I drank all the drain cleaner. I was playing pirate and the bottle had a skull and cross bones on it. I thought it was grog.
July fth, 2008 at 08:27 pm
I think it's supposed to be "Association of Murderers," not "Association of Murders."
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