The Great Depression Vs. The New Depression

October 12th, 2008 | 03:47 pm

As the economy struggles to find itself, there are new fears that America will be plunged into an economic downward spiral that would rival the Great Depression of the 1930s. But if we look around, it seems that we might already be in the early stages of a serious economic decline. Here's how the New Depression compares to the Great Depression.


1. The Great Depression - Unemployed men are forced to stand in line for hours on end just to get a few scraps of bread and a small bowl of warm soup that they can bring home to their starving families.

VS.


The New Depression - The economy has gotten so bad that four people, presumably unemployed, actually go into an Arby's.


2. The Great Depression - During the depression many children took on greater responsibilities at an earlier age than later generations would. Some teenagers found jobs when their parents could not, reversing the normal roles of provider and dependent.

VS.


The New Depression - With everyone tightening their belts, children of the New Depression are unable to afford a Wii, PS3 or Xbox 360, so they are forced to play with their old Sega Dreamcasts.


3. The Great Depression - With no money to pay for housing, squatters of the Great Depression built crude shacks in rural areas across America.

VS.


The New Depression - The sad, all-too-familiar site of an unfinished, desolate McMansion.


4. The Great Depression - Concerned about the solvency of their banking institutions, many savings and loans were forced into bankruptcy due to bank runs like this one.

VS.


The New Depression - When customers begin to panic over their saving in their online banks, they run into a much different problem than their 1930s counterparts.


5. The Great Depression - The percentage of women in the workforce increased during the depression, as women took jobs in very unsavory and unsafe working conditions to replace their husbands’ lost pay checks or to supplement spouses’ reduced wages.

VS.


The New Depression - With reality television as the main source of America's income, many women are forced into unsavory sexual conditions just to make ends meet.


6. The Great Depression - With demand far exceeding supply, many men are forced to wait in line for various and sundry items like shoes, clothes and tools.

VS.


The New Depression - With no way to check their email, make a phone call or see where they are via Google maps, many people leave their jobs and loved ones behind to wait in line for Apple's new iPhone.

Related Stories

11 Responses to "The Great Depression Vs. The New Depression"

  1. V Says:

    Morgan Lindenmayer is a major NOOB.

  2. Tez Says:

    During the Great Depression, laziness was uncommon, during this New Depression the lazy bastards that until now in order to stay on "the system"(welfare, etc.)all they had to do was open their legs and pop out a new, unwanted kid every 9 months, will now likely be cutoff after the 2nd kid thus forcing them into mass suicides or to actually try and work for a living.

    In short, people today wouldn't be able to weather what folks had to live through during the Great Depression.Most people are far too selfish and/or too used to having everything available to them when and where they want it.There's still no problem in life for those willing to learn,work, and better themselves and their families, but for those that are comfortable living off of and manipulting "the system", there are going to be MIGHTY desperate times coming.

  3. Says:

    During the Great Depression, laziness was uncommon, during this New Depression the lazy bastards that until now in order to stay on "the system"(welfare, etc.)all they had to do was open their legs and pop out a new, unwanted kid every 9 months, will now likely be cutoff after the 2nd kid thus forcing them into mass suicides or to actually try and work for a living.

    In short, people today wouldn't be able to weather what folks had to live through during the Great Depression.Most people are far too selfish and/or too used to having everything available to them when and where they want it.There's still no problem in life for those willing to learn,work, and better themselves and their families, but for those that are comfortable living off of and manipulting "the system", there are going to be MIGHTY desperate times coming.

  4. Dom Says:

    Potato Cakes and Arby sauce is the shit!

  5. Dinosaur Trader Says:

    Soon, people will be forced to fuck cats, that's what you all don't understand.

    This is sick.

    The New Depression is all about fucking cats to make ends meet. In the Great Depression, people just didn't do that shit.

    -DT

  6. Seth Says:

    curly fries are bomb

  7. skip Says:

    I bet Hef's girlfriends during the Great Depression were hotter!
    He was alive back then wasnt he?

  8. V Says:

    Fuck you, I like Arby's.

  9. Gourry Says:

    Jolt rocks! What are you talking about?

  10. Josh Says:

    That kid is also being forced to drink Jolt energy drink...

  11. Post new comment

    The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
    • Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically.
    • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd>
    • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.

    More information about formatting options