Welcome to HolyTaco's 2009 Douchebag Tournament! It's the only tournament in the world that pits 64 douchebags in a winner-take-all tourney, voted on by you, to determine who is crowned the Biggest Douchebag of 2009.
We took 16 douchebags from the fields of Entertainment, Sports, Business, and Politics, ranked them accordingly and matched them up in a manner similar to a crazy tournament between February and April that we can't name due to legal issues. So, the #1 ranked douchebag in each division plays the #16 ranked douchebag, the #2 ranked douchebag plays the #15 ranked douchebag and so on.
Each day we'll show the results and update the brackets to let you know who's advancing towards becoming the 2009 Douchebag Of The Year. Here's an up-to-date breakdown of all four brackets:
Alright people heres the deal:Dane Cook needs to win. not only because he is overrated, joke stealing, spazz with to much gel in his hair, but is also a way to stick it to his double digit IQ fans who so arrdently defend him. that right people he is such a d-bag he makes people drip douch by proxy....PS also, fuck Berine Madoff
If you don't win your conference tournament and you aren't one of the best remaining 32 teams......you probably shouldn't complain.
It is like ugly chicks complaining that they aren't married....no one cares...they should learn to suck cock and like it, do it daily....do it every morning as your man wakes up.....trust me, he'll marry you
Business sections is going to go down to AIG vs. Bernie Madoff, where Bernie will take the cake. Entertainment will come down to Perez Hilton and Tom Cruise, where it will come down to a coin toss. Politics will go to Michael Moore no questions asked.
just in case,,get it right...a douche bag is a mix of asshole and cocksucker with a side order of fag with a sperm swap dip.....can anybody add to this?,i may need input from my fellow mankind...please help..please,I cant find my ducky
I'm really pulling for Al Sharpton in the short term. I say, Al Sharpton will make dramatic upsets in the next two games after disposing of Joe the Plumber. This will put Al Sharpton in the Elite Eight, with a strong challenge vs. Rush Limbaugh. Also, enjoy the monumental match-up between A-Roid and T.O. Know what to do in case of Official Douchebag Emergency alerts during this contest!
On the one hand, how in the hell did Bush not make it through the first round! However, on the other hand, finally, America is learning from their mistakes and aren't voting for him...a little to late!!!!
This contest is obviously racist. I can't believe "the MAN" is not letting Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson run as 1 and 2 seeds so that they can meet in the championship. Instead, letting them knock each other off in Round 2, since none of the white douchebags have even a spitting chance against their incredible douchebagginess combined with race, religious and gender baiting.
wow people make a movie and you gt voted on someone get tons of young americans killed, use are tax dollars for war, and he does't get past 1st round seems like some cheating going on right duke lol wow
Damn Bush for doing something about 9/11 right?
Damn Bush for actually being bipartisan and listening to Nancy Pelosi, Al Gore, and Bill Clinton when they all said something had to be done in Iraq.
You are certainly a fucking idiot if you believe that Bush is singlehandedly responsible for this mess.He wasn't a great president but you cannot honestly believe he is the worst ever. If you say he is, then prove it
Stephen A Smith a 13 seed?! Tom Cruise a FIVE!?? a fucking 5? and most importantly how in the world does Bush get a 7 seed when he pretty much single-handedly destroyed the country. are you kidding me? those three should have been in tight competition for the overall number one.
actually on second thought, Bush should have won that in a landslide.
the Micheal Moore upset pretty much killed what hope i had left of living long enough to see another country be regarded as more retarded than the good ol' USA.
(371 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
March 20th, 2009 at 07:02 am
Can we have a write in?
March 20th, 2009 at 01:04 pm
You're crazy. The only landslide would be if Bush or Cheyney got on here
March 22nd, 2009 at 07:11 am
hey retard, bush is on the list. learn to read
March 23rd, 2009 at 08:10 am
no shit ass wipe, bush is on here and fat boy moore is totally dominating that round
March 20th, 2009 at 11:07 am
Alright people heres the deal:Dane Cook needs to win. not only because he is overrated, joke stealing, spazz with to much gel in his hair, but is also a way to stick it to his double digit IQ fans who so arrdently defend him. that right people he is such a d-bag he makes people drip douch by proxy....PS also, fuck Berine Madoff
March 20th, 2009 at 03:54 pm
I agree but seriously, that octomom bitch is by far the bigger douche. I'll be pissed if she doesn't make it to the final 2.
March 23rd, 2009 at 11:32 am
I have to agree Octomom is my pick in the entertainment division.
March 20th, 2009 at 01:16 pm
since Jump the shark became a douchebag website- go to www.bonethefish.com
feel free to rip on all of the shitty tv shows you love to hate!
March 20th, 2009 at 02:22 pm
obama?
March 22nd, 2009 at 06:48 am
Yeah where is that POS monkey?
March 23rd, 2009 at 01:39 pm
Probably finger banging your fat, smelly mother.
March 20th, 2009 at 10:42 pm
The sports division is missing;
1. NCAA basketball selection committee (men's)
2. NFL referees
March 23rd, 2009 at 04:56 pm
If you don't win your conference tournament and you aren't one of the best remaining 32 teams......you probably shouldn't complain.
It is like ugly chicks complaining that they aren't married....no one cares...they should learn to suck cock and like it, do it daily....do it every morning as your man wakes up.....trust me, he'll marry you
March 21st, 2009 at 07:51 pm
The ass kissing, self righteous dick licker Stephen A. Smith should win going away.
March 25th, 2009 at 02:16 am
amen
March 22nd, 2009 at 06:53 am
HAHAHA Replace Ted Stevens with Barack Obongo and you have the three most racist black people in America fighting for a spot in the top 8!
Ill go get my popcorn!
March 22nd, 2009 at 06:59 pm
Fuck you! lay off Santelli the guy just works hard and wants everyone to pull their own weight
March 23rd, 2009 at 06:25 pm
Santelli should be ass fucked with a cactus.
March 27th, 2009 at 11:38 pm
Before or after he's done banging your mom's brains out on your bed?
March 23rd, 2009 at 05:47 am
Business sections is going to go down to AIG vs. Bernie Madoff, where Bernie will take the cake. Entertainment will come down to Perez Hilton and Tom Cruise, where it will come down to a coin toss. Politics will go to Michael Moore no questions asked.
March 23rd, 2009 at 02:47 pm
How the hell did Michael Moore beat George Bush. The guy is a fucking retarded person. America is in a sad state of affairs.
March 23rd, 2009 at 05:56 pm
It was Bush 63% Moore 37% at 2 am last night. At 5 am it was Moore 67% Bush 33%. looks like Diebold is helping Bush again.
March 23rd, 2009 at 07:40 pm
Yeah exactly, this guy didn't make the cut. http://www.allhatnocattle.net/cover_dallas_bush.jpg
March 23rd, 2009 at 04:01 pm
this is clever.. but bush should atleast make it to the final 4, and where is dick in his ass chaney?
March 26th, 2009 at 05:38 pm
Banging your mom on your own bed, jackass
March 23rd, 2009 at 04:04 pm
just in case,,get it right...a douche bag is a mix of asshole and cocksucker with a side order of fag with a sperm swap dip.....can anybody add to this?,i may need input from my fellow mankind...please help..please,I cant find my ducky
March 23rd, 2009 at 09:13 pm
I'm really pulling for Al Sharpton in the short term. I say, Al Sharpton will make dramatic upsets in the next two games after disposing of Joe the Plumber. This will put Al Sharpton in the Elite Eight, with a strong challenge vs. Rush Limbaugh. Also, enjoy the monumental match-up between A-Roid and T.O. Know what to do in case of Official Douchebag Emergency alerts during this contest!
March 24th, 2009 at 05:45 am
I lost all faith in this shit when I saw that Michael Moore beat George Bush.
March 24th, 2009 at 08:34 am
Just shows you how big a douche Moore is.
March 24th, 2009 at 03:40 pm
I pray for plague when I read shit like this.
March 24th, 2009 at 08:12 pm
I hope that's a joke. Michael Moore might be the biggest douche bag on the list.
March 24th, 2009 at 08:51 am
On the one hand, how in the hell did Bush not make it through the first round! However, on the other hand, finally, America is learning from their mistakes and aren't voting for him...a little to late!!!!
March 24th, 2009 at 11:16 am
Well played my good friend.
April 7th, 2009 at 10:17 am
Fools clumping together.
March 24th, 2009 at 09:34 am
Will the voting results be posted today?
March 24th, 2009 at 01:27 pm
this isn't fair. You should have a win,loss,tie point system in a round robin tournament..
Shit the epic battle between al sharpton and jesse jackson is finished in the semis? total bullshit
March 24th, 2009 at 01:38 pm
Final Four: T.O. (over my personal favorite, Pacman), Chris Brown, Bill O'Reilly (big upset), and AIG.
March 25th, 2009 at 10:20 am
Thats a Legit 4 son.
March 26th, 2009 at 06:41 pm
I think Coulter will dispatch O'Reilly. It's going to be tough to knock off Sharpton. That guy is ground schmucks.
March 24th, 2009 at 01:46 pm
This contest is obviously racist. I can't believe "the MAN" is not letting Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson run as 1 and 2 seeds so that they can meet in the championship. Instead, letting them knock each other off in Round 2, since none of the white douchebags have even a spitting chance against their incredible douchebagginess combined with race, religious and gender baiting.
March 24th, 2009 at 03:54 pm
RacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacism
RacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacism
RacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacism
RacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacism
RacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacism
RacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacism
RacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacism
RacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacismRacism
::pisses pants::
March 27th, 2009 at 08:48 pm
Really? Really, racism? Which thread were you reading when you typed that?
March 24th, 2009 at 04:06 pm
i has gay
March 25th, 2009 at 12:40 am
vote bush
March 25th, 2009 at 12:47 am
wow people make a movie and you gt voted on someone get tons of young americans killed, use are tax dollars for war, and he does't get past 1st round seems like some cheating going on right duke lol wow
March 25th, 2009 at 04:16 pm
Are tax dollars? Are? Should have used are tax dollars on education.
March 26th, 2009 at 06:37 pm
I'm sorry "are" guy, but, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
March 26th, 2009 at 05:42 pm
I didn't know FDR was on the list.
March 26th, 2009 at 07:20 pm
Damn Bush for doing something about 9/11 right?
Damn Bush for actually being bipartisan and listening to Nancy Pelosi, Al Gore, and Bill Clinton when they all said something had to be done in Iraq.
You are certainly a fucking idiot if you believe that Bush is singlehandedly responsible for this mess.He wasn't a great president but you cannot honestly believe he is the worst ever. If you say he is, then prove it
March 25th, 2009 at 02:14 am
Stephen A Smith a 13 seed?! Tom Cruise a FIVE!?? a fucking 5? and most importantly how in the world does Bush get a 7 seed when he pretty much single-handedly destroyed the country. are you kidding me? those three should have been in tight competition for the overall number one.
actually on second thought, Bush should have won that in a landslide.
the Micheal Moore upset pretty much killed what hope i had left of living long enough to see another country be regarded as more retarded than the good ol' USA.
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