It’s finally here. The moment you’ve been anxiously awaiting for months: the paternity test came back negative! You’re not the father! Congratulations! In other news,
Holy Taco’s 2nd Annual Douchebag Tournament begins today! If you’re not familiar with the tournament, you can check out last year’s epic showdown
here. This year’s tournament will run pretty much the same as last year, except that we’re going to speed it up a little to keep it action-packed. We’ve also got a new logo:
How the Douchebag Tournament Works:
We took 64 douchebags from the fields of Entertainment, Sports, Politics, and Business, ranked them accordingly, and matched them up in a manner similar to a crazy college sports tournament that takes place in March but that we can’t name for legal reasons. The tournament will run for 10 days (March 16-March 26). Each day, we’ll present new match-ups between douchebags from all four categories and you’ll vote for who you think is the bigger douchebag. The losers will be out of the tournament, the winners will move on to the next round, and eventually one of these shitheads will be declared the Biggest Douchebag of 2010. New match-ups will be posted daily at about 2:30pm PST (to give us time to tally the votes). Alright, enough of this jibber-jabber. Here are the brackets for the 2010 Douchebag Tournament:
Last Update: 3/25/10, 11:20pm
We’ll be updating these brackets as the tournament progresses, so you can always come back here to see the current tournament standings (don’t worry, we’ll provide a link with every round’s contest post). Get some friends, bet on the tournament, and come back to vote every day at 2:30pm PST. The future is in your hands…Let the tournament begin!
Entertainment:
No way around it. Kanye.
(Dark horse: John Mayer, occasionally witty though he may be.)
Sports:
The damn Yankees. Fuck those guys.
(Dark horse: Kobe Bryant, who did not at all rape anyone, ever.)
Politics:
God, this one’s hard. Beck, though. I just hate him that much.
(Dark horse: that festering cancer mole, Ann Coulter)
Business:
It’s Jobs by a landslide. I can’t believe he’s so under-ranked.
(Dark horse: I’ll give it to Stanford. Six kids by four different women. And also, Prince Al-Waleed is not so bad a dude. He offered 10,000,000$ in relief after 9-11, which was promptly turned down by douchebag Giuliani on the basis of “you’re one’a them towel-head sum’bitches”.)
Where the fuck is Crosby. Fuck that guy. He was a douche before the Olympics.
ha Justin Halpern a 7 seed. Nice touch, could be a sleeper pick to win the whole thing.
Where the hell is Madoff in the business category?
yankees win the sports bracket with ease!
tiger woods? are you a woman? and if you hate jay leno then vote for jeff zucker. he’s the douchebag that screwed everything up in the first place. you can’t fault jay for being forced out and then wanting his gig back.
Why isn’t DonkeyXote in any brackets?
How long is voting open? 30 mins?
My Final Four pick: Jay Leno, Tiger Woods, Pat Robertson, Steve Jobs.
Too bad Floyd Mayweather is matched up with Tiger so early. I would have liked to see him do well, but I fear he is simply no match for the enormous douche juggernaut that is Tiger Woods.
Hope the following go as far as possible:
Charlie Sheen (for being a truther)
Spencer and Heidi (for being truthers)
Perez Hilton (for being everything that sucked about 2009)
Steve Jobs (for being the closest thing to a hipster / indie douchebag in the tournament – shame on you for not including more)
Why is Tiger Woods #1 in the sport bracket? Don’t tell me you wouldn’t have done the same.
How does one vote?
Because nobody else is obsessed with Donkey, except you and me.
Sorry little dude. Maybe you shouldn’t have been fapping TWICE to those pictures on HT and thereby miss out on the oportunity to vote in the article.
Stay tuned for more later in the day, and tomorrow!
HT, Lane Kiffin v Jimmy Clausen, epic matchup, took a while to decide on that..
I’m pulling for the Teabaggers.
Well, at least philosopher… ahh I mean “DokeyXote”, finally admits that there is more than one person who hates him.
HolyTaco should be the number one douche bags because they’re so stupid, they don’t even give you a place to go vote. A duh, we’re holy taco, we say vote, but we don’t give you a place to vote because we’re idiots.
How could you not include the entire Democrat Congressional Leadership??? Come on, Barney Frank, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reed are the largest group of douche’s ever assembled.
how can you forget bernie madoff for the business types?!
you cant have that little cunt justin bieber in the 1st round w/ jersey shore cast. thats just a waste
What? No Mark Zuckerberg? He would easily sweep business and probably be a strong contender in the finals. weak.
bullsh1t you libs suk it worse than barney frank
Calling “bullshit” on the Steve Jobs loss. What is being done to protect the integrity of the voting?
this is better than clash of the titans.
Kanye FTW… I defy anyone to show me a bigger douchebag.
although i like coffee more, it’s just more fun to say…
GOOOOO TEABAGGERS!!
I should be number one, come on people!
Olbermann eliminated by Jim Bunning? Edward R. Olbermann has been a first order DB for years?
WTF happened?
you sir, are a dumbass
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Learn to Read the Text not just look at who has the worst pic. Sorry Folks my brother was dropped as a child, then grew up as a flaming metro prick.
Guess you should make the list then, you fucking asswipe Republican trash. Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Your also a dumbfuck.
yes, but Roddy is on the next celebrity apprentice because he caught fame for being a crook, which in turn makes him a douchbag.
Well said. It was the same thing last year when Bernie Madoff got to the semi-finals.
Douchebag = Someone who can’t be PUNISHED BY LAW for what they do, but SHOULD be.
I fucking hate these thing because people don’t know what a douchebag is.
case in point: Spencer and Heidi: DOUCHEBAGS. Rod Blagojevitzhch: CROOK. see the difference?
Blago is a pretty big Douchebag! This is going way out there but almost more of douchebag than a crook.
They’re be a post with radial buttons to vote in each bracket (if they continue with what they did last year).
How do you vote?
Why the fuck aren’t I in the tournament?!!!!!!!
Man. The entertainment bracket is totally up for grabs.
The #5 seeds in every bracket are very strong.
My Final Four:
The cast of Jersey Shore barely edges out Robert Pattinson
Brett Favre squares off with Tim Tebow just in time to announce his retirement, giving him the edge to move into the final four.
John Edwards cheated on his cancer-stricken wife… if that isn’t douchebag, I don’t know what is. I think he wins the politics division outright, if not the whole thing. (if everyone voting is aware of what he did) As long as he can beat out Barack Obama, he wins the tourney.
I’ll wager that there is enough hate for Apple frequenting this site to get Steve Jobs into the final four in the business division.
Out of those four… I am going to go with John Edwards in the upset special.
Sorry but in the true sense of “douchebag” noone can knock off those pretty boy closet ass fuckers from the Jersey Shore. And everyone out there that is that way.
Ok. Kanya the gay fish stick would give them a good run.
Jon Gosselin, Tpain, Justin Beiber (you do not love her, you are 13. STFU), Lady GaGa, Rob Blago, Robert Pattinson (if theres any Jay Leno votes against him, go fuck yourself, Perez Hilton, Floyd Mayweather, Jimmy Clausen, Tony Kornheiser, Charles Barkley, Every single Yankee should be counted as a vote, Gilbert Arenas, Sean Avery, Tim Tebow, Glen Beck, Barack Obama, Keith Olbermann, Pat Robertson, Ariana Huffingotn, Mark Sanford, Rham Emanuel, David Paterson, Steve Jobs, and Akio Toyoda.
That took a while.
Justin Beiber is 16
Steve Jobs will probably sue Holy Taco for just using his name.
Kobe Bryant Vs. Sean Avery in the first round?! Those two are the biggest douchebags in the sports tourney, and you’re having them faceoff in the first round? disappointment
Kanye and Jay Leno
Jim Kramer and Rupert Murdoch
Politics is just ass backwards, they are all douchebags
I nominate = http://bit.ly/a3S4sb
Has HT taken any measures to prevent vote hacking this year?
nice. :]
Bunning and Olbermann should be finalists. Matching them up in the sweet sixteen is a mistake. Same for Stanford and Murdock.
What did Justin Bieber do to make you call him a douchebag?
SURVEY MONKEY IS BACK!!! HT you liars……..LIARS. Did I call the Palin v Coulter match up or what? Who’s awesome?
I’d say the voting was done right. Sorry your repuke views are in the minority.
If voting was done correctly Obama would win this thing hands down!
How the fuck is it that Keith Olbermann not win the whole damn thing?!?! Out in the first round, please. And all of the first round matchups are a little bit uneven too.
WTF?? I know Kanye is a douche…but how the eff did he beat John Mayer (The KING of the Douches!)?! smh. thoroughly disappointed.
What happened???
Politics:
Why are no Progressive Liberals listed? They are the #1 DOUCHBAGS of ALL; Obama, his wife, Pelosi, and Reid!!!!
Awww poor little trailer trash girl, maybe if you got your GED and put down the meth pipe you could become a medical assistant and make a whopping 15.00/hr !!!!!!!
girlamerica
And then you could live next to me in the trailer park and we could be bestest best friends and wait in the welfare lines with our obamaphones and our government handouts! I have to admit though, if I wasn’t tripping on all this meth I mentioned earlier I’d probably realize that Obama is the giant douchebag that he really is.
oh wait…
Glen Beck is smarter than me and I’m embarrassed that I can only name call!
ADD ME TO THE DOUCHELIST
Joe Biden should have been the number one seed out of
the politics region. How can anyone be a bigger
douchebag than him?
This has got to be one of the best brackets I didn’t get a chance to bet on. Shame on me for not visiting this site enough!
This is great. We did this at our site and somehow Kate I had 8 freaking kids and Sarah Palin kept winning the brackets