No one place on Earth harbors more passive aggression than an office kitchen. This can lead to some pretty interesting and potentially relationship crushing passiveaggressive notes. Here are the 25 most passive aggressive notes found in office kitchens.
let me start with the fact that just because you bring your lunch to work does not mean youre poor, and bringing up that fact and the EBT fact just goes to show you may have an education in books but not in life and it obviously didnt get you very far since you are working in the same environments as those 'poor people'. PS they also pay taxes so if they do recieve financial help through the goverment its not just your tax money supporting them they put into it aswell. as for people eating others lunches, its not funny and very rude cause there are reasons people bring their own food and you just ruined their lunch, thats real grown up!!! you must still be in highschool. as for the ones trapping the food, it doesnt work if you tell them its traped! it just makes them do it more.i agree with cynthia, bring a small cooler, or cold lunch box and keep at ur desk. as for the ones that can afford to go out everyday, dont assume that makes you better then others when realy it just makes you dumber cause you may blow that money in front of people everyday but mostlikely in privet you hafta figure out how to make up for it. you probly hafta ask your parents to help keep you afloat.Keep your minds open to other peoples situations!! THANKS FOR LISTENING!!
You sound like that lady i killd because she shouted thanks for listening at me when i didn't listen atall. I thnk she was mostlikely stil in highschool!!
The same thing happened to me this Morning, I made some chicken johnny the day before, put it in the fridge, marked it, went to get it hours later, and guess what?
just two pieces left out of eight, and one with a bite out of it. Yeah... and dont even got me started on boxes of donuts oh no!
I can calculate pi to 47 places and and I can USE the equation E=mc squared and actually understand what it means and the heavy implications that it has.
And your point?? You have totally failed to impress me.
-first off the notes these people have put up in order to keep others away from their food, haha...
as someone has already said "lunchbox it"
-second off the comments you people have posted are equally just as funny. dont be a moron, dont insult your neighbor, bc they bring their lunch, a home cooked meal (even if it is a left over) is so much better than the big mac you pick up. and the uneduacated poor person" whose ebt card isnt excepted at a restruant probably just enjyed a better meal than your crap colored, greasy burger.
it has always been a mystery to me
how men can feel themselves honoured
by the humiliation of their fellow beings.
PEACE!
Putting anything poisionous into food that someone will likely eat, even a thief, can result in some serious criminal charges. Not at all recommended! These days, non-intrusive methods like hidden video cams are of use in identifying shared-space food thieves. Personally, I feel sorry for people who have such low self-esteem that they would take a bite out of someone else's pizza slice or bran muffin.
I used to brown-bag almost daily when I had an office job, not only to save money for something more important than lunch, but because it was healthier. Fortunately, the others in my office were pretty respectful of other's food, and meal-stealing was not a problem.
This is the best read in a while, got me crackin up. I guess cause I've seen it so many times at work myself. I thought my offie was the only one that has this horrible problem. , glad to know I do not suffer alone. LOL
People, why is this an issue? Get back to life. What you are complaining about has no real substance. Who cares who goes out to eat. Or who brings their own lunch? Food is food, and not a society standard. BREATH
Erin, god dammit. God DAMN it Erin. Can't you see? This is important stuff, Erin! We gotta figure this shit out! Come on! Be a part of the solution, Erin! Not the problem.
Food is NOT food, Erin. Food is so much more. Yet, also, at the same time, and by the same token, food IS food. it's just food Erin. Also, Bacon is life. FACT.
I don't understand how people put so much energy into these responses... Oop! I'm contradicting myself by leaving a comment. Oh well, just joining a few of the hypocrites here :) -\"/
Jenni - I'm gonna ask you to do something. But I don't want you to freak out, ok? It's not "weird", it's perfectly normal. Don't listen to your girlfriends, they're just jealous of our relationship. Its purity. Its rich, smoky flavor.
Here's what i want you to do, Jenni... [hands Jenni a ceremonial urn filled with room temperature bacon grease]... take this lard, Jenni - and annoint me. Annoint my torso with it. Give me life.
I work overnight and am the only person that works overnight at my job. If someone leaves their lunch in the fridge over night it is fair game. This was a rule set down by my company owner and CEO. If you bring food to work for lunch, make sure it is either disposed of or someone else will dispose of it for you. Last night I had some amazing french bread and some pasta all thanks to a forgetful co-worker. I get fed almost everynight because people leave their food in the fridge.
That's pretty awesome, FoodEater. Your CEO is very clever- keeping the workplace tidy by allowing the scavengers to scavenge. I wonder if that wisdom might be applied elsewhere?
Hookers left overnight in hotel rooms? (It's not like the pimp isn't angry already.)
Sperm left overnight in hookers? (Husband got a vasectomy? All juice, no seeds? Can't find a gay dude with a turkey baster? Hot and cold running semen on tap, ladies!)
Babies left overnight in maternity wards? (I've always wanted a tiny butler. If it doesn't work out, I can leave it in the fridge overnight and FoodEater'll take care of it.)
Thanks for posthing this.
I was counting on an ice cold soda, that I had put in the frige before school, when I got home only to find some fucker had taken it.
i just think that food brought into the office fridge is public fucking property. If you leave it there, it's up for grabs at lunch - unless you get first, i'll fucking steal that shit.
i bring my food to work, shit saves HELLA money. plus i work out, need my quality carbs [flexes glistening torso]. you like that? you like what you see, bitch? yeah, that's right. Meat, baby. fucking meat.
Don't suppose you proud carnivores/fast food addicts realize the best reason for cutting that shit out? Going down on a burger-eater is disgusting. Vegetarians just taste better. I don't care how hot a girl is... if she eats starts sweating out the smell of the grease traps from fast food joints in the middle of a good time, that's just fucking gross. Go ahead and be all self-righteous and whine that "the tofu nazis" can have your steak when they pry it out of your cold, dead hands... isn't getting more head reason enough? Or did you think that loading yourself up with cholesterol, saturated fats, and food preservatives would give you more energy and make you a better lover?
I don't care what you reply back, I bet a lot of you have never thought about this aspect. Shit, this is privileged information... use it however you want.
Well, yeah, Alex, if you eat too much meat, bad things happen.
That's a given. It's unhealthy to overdo ANYTHING.
But giving up meat altogether? Ludicrous, particularly from the "health" standpoint most vegetarians and vegans take. The simple fact of it all is that human beings are omnivores. Not herbivores, not carnivores, omnivores. There are certain essential amino acids and animal-based proteins that we REQUIRE to be healthy, that are extremely difficult or impossible to get from purely vegetarian sources.
That said, most Americans eat way too much red meat, and have abominably high sodium intakes.
Where do you people work!? I can't understand what kind of co-worker would grab someone elses lunch. I've worked in engineering firms for years now and have never had a problem with anyone touching my food or even heard of that happening.
If you have a problem with someone taking your food a post-it note will not solve it, just get a lunchbox or a cooler and keep it at you desk.
I remember in high school, some jackass with a master key to all the lockers kept stealing my lunch, along with several other people's. I knew who it was. (Next parts kinda gross, I know...) So I got a tampon from my mom, made a nice big sandwich, put the tampon in it, and then smothered it all with plenty of ketchup. That idiot started to eat the sandwich without even looking to see what it was, got a bite of the ketchup covered tampon, and in his disgust, jumped up and back from the table cursing as the tampon fell out of his mouth. Everyone in the cafeteria saw it, and the laughter was uncontainable. Suffice to say, he didn't steal anyone's lunch again after that.
i work in a factory and store my lunch in the refrigerators. i have had plenty of food stolen and once, found someone using my dirty tupperware after i had eaten out of it. we have a supervisor who will sit next to your lunch and eat it when your not there.
also im vegetarian and every day someone asks if im eating tofu (i usually am).
We almost talked the DARE officer to letting us use the purple explding dye packs
that banks use to help us catch the (what we were sure of but could not
prove) the one person that was eating our lunches.
i guess it was not policy. We also thought of mouse traps, exlax brownies, and a lot of ohter fun things that helped us let off steam.
(229 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
September 21st, 2009 at 07:19 pm
thats just nasty
September 21st, 2009 at 07:32 pm
lol.
im gonna write some shit like that next time someone eats my crackers!!
September 21st, 2009 at 07:41 pm
if it was a male id put some erectile disfunctional pills in a linch that they would steal
September 22nd, 2009 at 08:48 pm
Mmmmm... anti-boner linch pills.
September 21st, 2009 at 07:53 pm
let me start with the fact that just because you bring your lunch to work does not mean youre poor, and bringing up that fact and the EBT fact just goes to show you may have an education in books but not in life and it obviously didnt get you very far since you are working in the same environments as those 'poor people'. PS they also pay taxes so if they do recieve financial help through the goverment its not just your tax money supporting them they put into it aswell. as for people eating others lunches, its not funny and very rude cause there are reasons people bring their own food and you just ruined their lunch, thats real grown up!!! you must still be in highschool. as for the ones trapping the food, it doesnt work if you tell them its traped! it just makes them do it more.i agree with cynthia, bring a small cooler, or cold lunch box and keep at ur desk. as for the ones that can afford to go out everyday, dont assume that makes you better then others when realy it just makes you dumber cause you may blow that money in front of people everyday but mostlikely in privet you hafta figure out how to make up for it. you probly hafta ask your parents to help keep you afloat.Keep your minds open to other peoples situations!! THANKS FOR LISTENING!!
September 22nd, 2009 at 08:54 pm
You sound like that lady i killd because she shouted thanks for listening at me when i didn't listen atall. I thnk she was mostlikely stil in highschool!!
September 21st, 2009 at 07:57 pm
The same thing happened to me this Morning, I made some chicken johnny the day before, put it in the fridge, marked it, went to get it hours later, and guess what?
just two pieces left out of eight, and one with a bite out of it. Yeah... and dont even got me started on boxes of donuts oh no!
September 21st, 2009 at 08:05 pm
I can calculate pi to 47 places and and I can USE the equation E=mc squared and actually understand what it means and the heavy implications that it has.
And your point?? You have totally failed to impress me.
September 21st, 2009 at 08:43 pm
Your name is LATTEWHORE...Hun, let me assure you that no one cares to impress you.
September 21st, 2009 at 10:49 pm
Don't care what anyone else says, that was pure pwnage.
September 22nd, 2009 at 01:13 pm
Only poor people eat lunch at work.
Only democrats think poor people pay taxes.
Only douche bags calculate Pi.
There, it's settled...
September 23rd, 2009 at 06:15 pm
Hey D - succinct, kudos.
September 21st, 2009 at 08:46 pm
this whole page makes me crack up.
-first off the notes these people have put up in order to keep others away from their food, haha...
as someone has already said "lunchbox it"
-second off the comments you people have posted are equally just as funny. dont be a moron, dont insult your neighbor, bc they bring their lunch, a home cooked meal (even if it is a left over) is so much better than the big mac you pick up. and the uneduacated poor person" whose ebt card isnt excepted at a restruant probably just enjyed a better meal than your crap colored, greasy burger.
it has always been a mystery to me
how men can feel themselves honoured
by the humiliation of their fellow beings.
PEACE!
September 21st, 2009 at 09:54 pm
Putting anything poisionous into food that someone will likely eat, even a thief, can result in some serious criminal charges. Not at all recommended! These days, non-intrusive methods like hidden video cams are of use in identifying shared-space food thieves. Personally, I feel sorry for people who have such low self-esteem that they would take a bite out of someone else's pizza slice or bran muffin.
I used to brown-bag almost daily when I had an office job, not only to save money for something more important than lunch, but because it was healthier. Fortunately, the others in my office were pretty respectful of other's food, and meal-stealing was not a problem.
September 21st, 2009 at 10:08 pm
i second that, you guys crack me up! lol
September 21st, 2009 at 10:12 pm
...HT always has the Best Comments Section! Check out the comments on the photos.
September 21st, 2009 at 11:01 pm
This is the best read in a while, got me crackin up. I guess cause I've seen it so many times at work myself. I thought my offie was the only one that has this horrible problem. , glad to know I do not suffer alone. LOL
September 22nd, 2009 at 12:05 am
People, why is this an issue? Get back to life. What you are complaining about has no real substance. Who cares who goes out to eat. Or who brings their own lunch? Food is food, and not a society standard. BREATH
September 22nd, 2009 at 02:29 pm
Erin, god dammit. God DAMN it Erin. Can't you see? This is important stuff, Erin! We gotta figure this shit out! Come on! Be a part of the solution, Erin! Not the problem.
Food is NOT food, Erin. Food is so much more. Yet, also, at the same time, and by the same token, food IS food. it's just food Erin. Also, Bacon is life. FACT.
September 22nd, 2009 at 02:19 am
hahaahah, why are you idiots so idiotic.. I know because youre idiots
September 22nd, 2009 at 05:51 am
well said lol
September 22nd, 2009 at 08:21 am
I don't understand how people put so much energy into these responses... Oop! I'm contradicting myself by leaving a comment. Oh well, just joining a few of the hypocrites here :) -\"/
September 22nd, 2009 at 02:37 pm
Jenni - I'm gonna ask you to do something. But I don't want you to freak out, ok? It's not "weird", it's perfectly normal. Don't listen to your girlfriends, they're just jealous of our relationship. Its purity. Its rich, smoky flavor.
Here's what i want you to do, Jenni... [hands Jenni a ceremonial urn filled with room temperature bacon grease]... take this lard, Jenni - and annoint me. Annoint my torso with it. Give me life.
LIFE!
September 22nd, 2009 at 09:03 am
I work overnight and am the only person that works overnight at my job. If someone leaves their lunch in the fridge over night it is fair game. This was a rule set down by my company owner and CEO. If you bring food to work for lunch, make sure it is either disposed of or someone else will dispose of it for you. Last night I had some amazing french bread and some pasta all thanks to a forgetful co-worker. I get fed almost everynight because people leave their food in the fridge.
October 14th, 2009 at 10:40 pm
That's pretty awesome, FoodEater. Your CEO is very clever- keeping the workplace tidy by allowing the scavengers to scavenge. I wonder if that wisdom might be applied elsewhere?
Hookers left overnight in hotel rooms? (It's not like the pimp isn't angry already.)
Sperm left overnight in hookers? (Husband got a vasectomy? All juice, no seeds? Can't find a gay dude with a turkey baster? Hot and cold running semen on tap, ladies!)
Babies left overnight in maternity wards? (I've always wanted a tiny butler. If it doesn't work out, I can leave it in the fridge overnight and FoodEater'll take care of it.)
There's no ceiling on this one, folks.
September 22nd, 2009 at 11:45 am
Every single one of these notes was stolen from
September 22nd, 2009 at 01:06 pm
Thanks for posthing this.
I was counting on an ice cold soda, that I had put in the frige before school, when I got home only to find some fucker had taken it.
September 22nd, 2009 at 02:06 pm
i just think that food brought into the office fridge is public fucking property. If you leave it there, it's up for grabs at lunch - unless you get first, i'll fucking steal that shit.
September 22nd, 2009 at 02:26 pm
BACON IS LIFE
Vegans can eat my meat.
i bring my food to work, shit saves HELLA money. plus i work out, need my quality carbs [flexes glistening torso]. you like that? you like what you see, bitch? yeah, that's right. Meat, baby. fucking meat.
BACON. IS. LIFE!
September 22nd, 2009 at 11:49 pm
Don't suppose you proud carnivores/fast food addicts realize the best reason for cutting that shit out? Going down on a burger-eater is disgusting. Vegetarians just taste better. I don't care how hot a girl is... if she eats starts sweating out the smell of the grease traps from fast food joints in the middle of a good time, that's just fucking gross. Go ahead and be all self-righteous and whine that "the tofu nazis" can have your steak when they pry it out of your cold, dead hands... isn't getting more head reason enough? Or did you think that loading yourself up with cholesterol, saturated fats, and food preservatives would give you more energy and make you a better lover?
I don't care what you reply back, I bet a lot of you have never thought about this aspect. Shit, this is privileged information... use it however you want.
September 23rd, 2009 at 12:01 am
ps -
a) Yeah, I definitely have moments of missing bacon sandwiches.
b) blueBalls: you are one funny motherfucker.
September 23rd, 2009 at 07:46 am
Fine, girls and your boyfriend can go vegan than. I'm gonna eat-fuck the rest of your share.
September 23rd, 2009 at 04:56 pm
Well, yeah, Alex, if you eat too much meat, bad things happen.
That's a given. It's unhealthy to overdo ANYTHING.
But giving up meat altogether? Ludicrous, particularly from the "health" standpoint most vegetarians and vegans take. The simple fact of it all is that human beings are omnivores. Not herbivores, not carnivores, omnivores. There are certain essential amino acids and animal-based proteins that we REQUIRE to be healthy, that are extremely difficult or impossible to get from purely vegetarian sources.
That said, most Americans eat way too much red meat, and have abominably high sodium intakes.
P.S. Bacon is LIFE!
September 22nd, 2009 at 06:26 pm
Hey, BaconIsFuckingLife, vegans DO run marathons and they're champs at it! Good luck with that heart attack.
September 23rd, 2009 at 02:22 am
if i brough pizza id take a shit in the box with me, who would wana steal someones pizza that has shit beside it?
September 23rd, 2009 at 07:42 am
If you use the office refrigerator, you're asking for some cat anus to fuck with your shit.
Just eat Arby's every day.
Then die.
September 23rd, 2009 at 08:50 am
ROFLCOPTER OMGWTFBURGERKINGDAIRYQUEENBBQ!!!!111010111eleven101!
September 23rd, 2009 at 09:57 am
I myself am a vegan,I do run marathons...but I also don't give two big shits where you throw your fucking pizza.
September 23rd, 2009 at 11:00 am
ROTFL that is priceless dude!
RT
www.online-privacy.us.tc
September 23rd, 2009 at 11:13 am
Where do you people work!? I can't understand what kind of co-worker would grab someone elses lunch. I've worked in engineering firms for years now and have never had a problem with anyone touching my food or even heard of that happening.
If you have a problem with someone taking your food a post-it note will not solve it, just get a lunchbox or a cooler and keep it at you desk.
September 23rd, 2009 at 11:31 am
aPlateOfGrapes. Will you marry me.... and stop all the toying with the mice! Me luv-um some grapes topped with smart ass!
September 23rd, 2009 at 06:29 pm
Alas, I am married and have a kid.
September 23rd, 2009 at 12:48 pm
Mr. Rich Guy Eats in Restaurants Because He Has Teh PhD:
If you were really smart, you'd eat food you had made, because then you would know what was actually in it.
Secret sauce, my man. Enjoy!
September 23rd, 2009 at 12:55 pm
I remember in high school, some jackass with a master key to all the lockers kept stealing my lunch, along with several other people's. I knew who it was. (Next parts kinda gross, I know...) So I got a tampon from my mom, made a nice big sandwich, put the tampon in it, and then smothered it all with plenty of ketchup. That idiot started to eat the sandwich without even looking to see what it was, got a bite of the ketchup covered tampon, and in his disgust, jumped up and back from the table cursing as the tampon fell out of his mouth. Everyone in the cafeteria saw it, and the laughter was uncontainable. Suffice to say, he didn't steal anyone's lunch again after that.
September 23rd, 2009 at 04:23 pm
That is so much better than ex-lax brownies or anything else we thought of
totally gross and totally perfect
September 23rd, 2009 at 01:10 pm
i work in a factory and store my lunch in the refrigerators. i have had plenty of food stolen and once, found someone using my dirty tupperware after i had eaten out of it. we have a supervisor who will sit next to your lunch and eat it when your not there.
also im vegetarian and every day someone asks if im eating tofu (i usually am).
September 23rd, 2009 at 04:20 pm
We almost talked the DARE officer to letting us use the purple explding dye packs
that banks use to help us catch the (what we were sure of but could not
prove) the one person that was eating our lunches.
i guess it was not policy. We also thought of mouse traps, exlax brownies, and a lot of ohter fun things that helped us let off steam.
September 23rd, 2009 at 04:27 pm
If God wanted humans to be Vegans S/He would not have given us variagated dentition. (You know. Molars. Incisors. etc.)
September 23rd, 2009 at 05:01 pm
Or a requirement for animal-based proteins and essential amino acids.
September 23rd, 2009 at 06:32 pm
To quote an unknown source (because I'm too lazy to look it up): "If god didn't want us to eat animals, He wouldn't have made them out of meat."
Delicious meat...
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