25 Reasons Why the Year of the Dragon is Sure to be Awesome

2012 is the Year of the Dragon and with China being the super power it is in the world, we wouldn’t be foolish to expect more fire-breathing monstrosities than ever before. Since we’ll have to endure fantastical flying reptiles that eat people and hoard treasure for the next year or so, Holy Taco staffers took it upon themselves to research the topic and come up with some reasons why you should be stoked about the year of the dragon.

1. Last year was the year of the rabbit, in which nothing good happened and Randy Savage died. This year Randy Savage can’t die again, so the year of the Dragon wins
2. Dragons > unicorns > goblins > Jersey Shore. And Jersey Shore still gets millions of viewers every week.
3. Mayans and morons think the world is going to end in December. You tell that to a dragon.
4. If there’s any chance a dragon might scorch TLC’s and A&E’s prime time programming from the face of the earth, we should support it.
5. If you catch a dragon, it has to grant you three wishes. But the wishes can only be to burn something.
6. You could build a fort on a dragon if it’s big enough. You can build a fort on no other Zodiac animals, especially not a pig.
7. Dragons never drink milk out of the carton
8. There are no dragons in the Kardashian bloodline (just trolls).
9. Bruce Lee
10. How to Train Your Dragon > How to Train Your Drag Queen
11. Dragons won’t poop on your lawn
12. Because it’s the year of the dragon, your team will win the Superbowl this weekend. Wait and see.
13. Friday by Rebecca Black was not recorded in the year of the dragon. And it wouldn’t have been, either.
14. All Chinese food at restaurants with ‘dragon’ in the name will be half price. If they question this when you bring it up, keep arguing until they give in
15. Can’t spell dragon without “dong”
16. Teddy Roosevelt was a dragon
17. A Game of Thrones has dragons. Take that every show that isn’t Game of Thrones
18. Scott Baio cowrote the movie Zapped with a dragon
19. Terrorists hate dragons
20. A dragon with a boner is a sight you will never forget
21. Dragons are awesome at poker
22. You won’t be able to ride Falcor to school again for 12 years
23.
24. All of the terrible movies on Nic Cage’s career were made in years other than the year of the dragon
25. If a dragon sees his shadow today, Spring still shows up whether it likes it or not