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25 Things We Could Do in an Elevator Together

It’s you and me on our way up to the 13th floor and the elevator craps out.  We’re trapped.  Is help coming?  Maybe. Maybe we’ll die here together.  Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.  What exactly can you do with me on an elevator we may never get off of?  Behold!

  1. Play “I spy”
  2. Plays pantsless “I spy”
  3. Trade pants
  4. Wrestle
  5. Trade phones and try to beat each others’ high scores on whatever terrible app game we waste our time playing.  I’m still doing Angry Birds Star Wars every time I go to the bathroom.
  6. Dance off
  7. Square dance off
  8. Pants off
  9. Make out party
  10. light a shoe on fire and tell ghost stories until the fumes make us black out
  11. Try to recreate integral scenes from the Lord of the Rings franchise
  12. Collaborate on writing new Gotye songs
  13. Blame farts on each other
  14. Marry each other, then grow embittered by our empty lives and get divorced
  15. Schwarzenegger impression competition
  16. Use belts as whips; have whip fight
  17. Try to correctly guess the lyrics to “It’s the End of the World” by REM
  18. Share a sandwich, if either of us has one
  19. Curse each other for not bringing sandwiches if neither of us did
  20. Probably some sex
  21. Give each other prison tattoos
  22. Steamroll each other
  23. huddle together nude to conserve body heat
  24. Establish a new society.  If help arrives, kill and eat help
  25. Ignore each other uncomfortably the entire time

 

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