Everyone is abuzz with talk of how Sarah Palin is proficient at making boners. But did you know that congress boasts some hot chicks of their own, sort of? Here’s a list of our 8 favorite.
8. Marsha Blackburn Tennessee, 7th Congressional District (Republican)
She took over the seat for Fred Thompson, the dude from Law And Order. A staunch republican, her turn-ons include long walks through white neighborhoods and not being asked about the Iraq War. Mostly we like her because she dresses like every porn star right before the jazzy music starts and they say some shit like “I can’t help you get that bill passed but I can help you get that cock hard.
7. Yvette D. Clark. New York, 11th Congressional District (Democrat)
She initiated a HIV/AIDS Task force, as well as a sanitation task force, so you know she’s not going to have any STDS and her apartment will probably be clean. Her bio says her “parents were Jamaican immigrants who provided her with a modest upbringing,” which when translated into sex speak means “she’s not all stuck up and unwilling to perform oral sex.”
6. Stephanie Herseth Sandlin. South Dakota, At-Large seat (Democrat)
She won a special election after the incumbent was convicted of manslaughter. Although she’s a democrat, she’s a firm opponent of gun control, which is sort of like being an Eagles fan who wears a Tony Romo jersey to games. Either way, she looks like Rebecca De Mornay if she hadn’t slept in a few weeks and lived solely off solely Beef Jerky and Sunny Delight. Still, that’s pretty hot.
5. Hilda Solis. California, 32nd congressional district, (Democrat)
I’m not sure if this photo is from her congressional website, or from a glamour shot she took at a Westfield Shopping Mall, either way, me likey. Hilda isn’t afraid to stand up to President Bush, or split ends, as she frequently battles with both.
4. Cathy McMorris Rodgers. Washington, 5th congressional district, (Republican)
Wearing a leather jacket in your congressional photo means you either like to party or no, it only means you like to party. Although her haircut reminds us of a young Tom Cruise in “Risky Business, she’s got a smile that says “Just because I represent a small faction of evangelical Christians, doesn’t mean I can’t find a passage of the bible that says it’s okay to get naked and take jello shots.
3. Loretta Sanchez , California, 47th district (Democrat)
Rumor has it she was called “a whore by fellow congressman Joe Baca, which means he tried to sleep with her and she said no. She is a great proponent of civil rights, as well as pants suits, which upon an extensive photo search, it would seem she has unlimited supply of.
2. Kirsten Gillibrand , New York, 20th district (Democrat)
She worked as “special counsel during Bill Clinton’s presidency, which is basically the equivalent of being a waitress at a strip club; you don’t have to take off your clothes, but you’re not allowed to complain when someone cops a cheap feel on your ass.
1. Mary Bono- California, 44th district (Republican)
Sonny Bono’s smoking hot widow. She single handedly has made it possible to masturbate to C-span. She proposed a bill in 2005 to raise her own pay. I say pay the woman. Otherwise the nicest set of boobs in congress will belong to Ted Kennedy.
134. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen. Florida, 18th Congressional District
Okay, so she’s not hot, but she looks like a cross between Phillip Seymour Hoffman in “Boogie Nights, and Phillip Seymour Hoffman in “Mission Impossible III. The fact that I had to use two different Phillip Seymour Hoffman performances to describe her appearance is noteworthy.