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8 Truthful Celebrity Autobiography Covers

Famous people are always writing autobiographies that aren’t really honest. So here are the covers for 9 celebrity biographies that we think are a little more truthful.

8. Stedman Graham

7. Mario Lopez

6. Mel Gibson

5. Jeff Skilling

4. Manny Ramirez

3. Tori Spelling

2. Matthew McConaughey

1. Spencer Pratt

Special thanks to readers Amanda S., Scott S., and Patrick S. for helping out.  No, they’re not related.

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29 Responses to "8 Truthful Celebrity Autobiography Covers"

  1. godzillad says:

    Watch The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation and tell me McConaughey has no talent. It’s like he’s the only person in the movie who took his job of acting serious. Zelweger was ridiculous in it and it’s a shame she’s got all the awards and he didn’t. Hell you can use MMAth with that movie to show he’s a better actor than she is and therfore deserves her statues.

  2. Blank McGee says:

    I’m cool with the Pratty Donkey Shit… it has a certain turd-appeal just like him… good solid turd log

  3. Anonymous says:


  4. kim e says:

    funny stuff. who’s spencer pratt?

  5. toetag says:

    what career?

  6. Well, the mentioned people are some sort of famous and they are good at it. Would be really great to see the taco in a hand of a really good celeb. Paris or Tom Hanks perhaps.

  7. erichansa says:

    “From the author of Absolutely Not One God Damn Thing”

  8. jasong says:

    I’ve never even heard of spencer pratt. And Tori is harsh horsefaced. She was the dog on 90210.

  9. RunDMB112 says:

    Haha, I like the Manny one. Ya’ll should do one just on athletes. Lots of material to work with, and celebrities are beginning to bore me.

  10. Larry says:

    You very funny man…

  11. anonomis says:

    they forgot “If i did it” by OJ, that one didnt even need changing.

  12. dean says:

    Stedman Grahm is just using Oprah’s name to further his career!

  13. Kobie says:

    The Spencer Pratt one is made of win.

  14. Mel G. says:

    You can all meet me on 4-20 for my birthday party.Just come to Iran.We share some of the same hate.

  15. Mr. McTono says:

    Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono.

  16. Anonymoust says:

    Thanks, funny story!


  17. Jake says:

    Die sportsfan. Die.
    (3 up)

    And also..
    Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono Tono

  18. That Jerkoff. says:

    Spencer and his “wife” are retarded fame whores probably fucking director after director to get a show of their own. and yes, since most of the directors are male, spencers ecstatic.

  19. Muwasalat.com says:

    Creating the sensitive awareness. Not talking metaphorically.

  20. Stedman says:

    Fuck all you motherfuckas!

  21. Roger Lodge says:

    Great list! One of HolyTaco’s finest!

  22. Joe Go says:

    Pretty damn funny.

  23. Jonze says:

    haha this is awesome – Front page of digg, asap?


  24. greg says:

    I laughed so hard I pooped my pants.

  25. Pratik says:

    How about one for Paris Hilton’s book…

    Confessions of an Heiress

    Foreword (written by some dude that nailed her in some club in east LA)
    Chapter one: I do swallow.
    Afterword (written by the dude’s friend who claims to have gotten it on tape)

  26. bud says:

    Lucy Pinder/Katie Price/Keeley Hazel

    I’m British and have sweet cans

  27. SnakesOnMyPlane says:

    OK, been coming to the Taco since a colleague sent a link with the subject “you gotta go to this site”.

    The ladies are fine, but like Playboy, I have to admit I read the Taco for the articles. I swear that at least once a day, there is at least one article that is, at minimum, close to ‘piss your pants’ funny.

    So today, I see the first jpeg on Stedman, same result. Thank you Taco, for replacing the void left by SNL since Hartman and Farley went to go push up daisies.

  28. Scott says:

    That Spencer Pratt one is outrageously funny

  29. Pete says:

    I would have gone with “Monkey Shit” for Pratt. Simply because his name being uttered is much like the poo being thrown through the air by said monkey.