Low budget commercials are one of the many things the internet feeds off of. If you had a silly low budget commercial featuring a man screaming in the face of a cute kitten about the low prices of his mattresses, Youtube servers would shut down and global work productivity would screech to a halt.
On March 30th, the world was given yet another low budget local commercial, but this one has some star power behind hit: Vince Neil, lead singer of Motley Crue. And this isn’t a commercial for just any mom-and-pop local business – this is for Girls, Girls, Girls, Vince Neil’s very own strip club.
Let’s take a deeper look in to the filth that is this commercial.
Right out of the gate we are smacked in the face by what appears to be a recent lotto winner surrounding himself with enough female attention as his mega-millions jackpot can buy.
Girls, Girls, Girls is the name you have to default to when a member of Motley Crue is in anyway involved with a strip club. It’s lazy, but it’s the logical choice, because “Smokin’ In The Boy’s Room” implies male thongs with extra-long elephant trunk dick pockets in the front.
Vince mentions that, in his strip club, only good old rock music will be played. This is because rock’n’roll is now a musical genre that can only be found in strip clubs. Sure, bands like Arcade Fire are big rock acts today, but watching a stripper work the pole while a song about the hardships of suburban youth blares in the background would be like hearing the sad narration of the stripper’s life.
In this scene, Vince Neil informs us that he enjoys the company of women. Not only that, he enjoys the company of many different types of women. But mostly, company of women that look like space hookers from the year 3000.
The pause that these girls take in-between the lines “Vince! Oh, Vince…” and “We’re ready for our audition!” can attributed to one of two reasons: 1) the time in between lines is how long it took the production assistant to flip the cue cards, or 2) a rare sighting of a three-way brain fart.
For your own safety, I am going to follow the previous picture with a picture of a tetanus shot.