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A-Rod, A-Rod Wife, Make A-Rod Baby

Even though Alex Rodriguez can’t come through in the clutch, apparently his sperm can.  People.com reports:

Rodriguez, 32, was with his wife Cynthia, 34, as she gave birth to the couple’s second daughter, born Monday night in Miami, his team announced.

The baby, whose name has not been revealed, weighed 7 lbs., 2 oz.

It’s also been reported that the baby poked his head out of Cynthia’s vagina and refused to come out and live as a Rodriguez family member until they agreed to sign him to a contract of 18 years, 770 million dollars with additional incentives including a promise that he’ll be breast fed till he’s 6 and will not be forced to make doo doos like a big boy until he feels he’s ready.

I’m trying to think of what in the hell A-Rod would name his baby.   Will he give it a normal name like “Daniel Rodriguez” or will he give it one of those cooky celebrity baby names like “Icanthitworthagoddamnshitintheplayoffs Rodriguez.”

Anyway, I obtained a photo of the newborn.  Let’s take a look see!

Derek Jeter, you got some splaining to do.

3 Responses to "A-Rod, A-Rod Wife, Make A-Rod Baby"

  1. Buddy Ice says:

    You know A-Rod is a grade A douche bag when he’s pretty much the highest paid athlete ever. and he can only get an average looking wife.

    Ha ha (To be read in the voice of The Simpson’s character ‘Nelson’).

  2. Pratik says:

    I’m surprised Alex and Cynthia didn’t conceive their child during last November. That way, about nine months later in July, Scott Boras could announce their child’s birth during the 9th inning of the All-Star game.

    You know… kind of like how the exact same thing happened during the the 8th inning of Game 4 of last year’s World Series when the Red Sox were finishing up their ass-reaming of the Rockies, when Scott Boras announced that Alex would be staying with the Yankees.

    Worst timing ever.

  3. GTA says:

    didn’t it say “couple’s second daughter” – I’m sure he appreciates your amazing powers of observation and accuracy