Holy Taco staffers are a wily bunch, which is to say we’re sponsored by an anonymous pharmaceutical giant from whom we scored a case of chloroform and that, in turn has resulted in us getting our hands on a lot of really rare stuff in the last few days. Amongst our rare finds? The unreleased script for Aliens 5, written by Joss Whedon, rewritten by Paul W.S. Anderson, rewritten by Judd Apatow, rewritten by Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg, rewritten by Uwe Boll and finally set on fire only to mysteriously resist the flames. And now we have a copy. Oh man, I bet this’ll be awesome!