Recently we here at the Taco were talking about anal sex (shocking, I know) and we realized that the way women feel about anal sex is almost identical to the way they feel about eating at the restaurant Chili's. Here's how we broke it down.
1. Women Who Don't Love Chili's But Will Eat There On Ocassion
A lot of womenthink Chili’s is just okay. If they’re hungry and they’re near a Chili’s, you might be able to talk them in to eating there. Or, if it’s your birthday, and Chili’s is your faaaavorite place to go, then your girlfriend might say “okay, fine, it’s your birthday, we’ll go to Chili’s and I won’t complain. I’ll even order the Queso Skillet.” They'll never ask to go to Chili's, but they can understand why you enjoy the food there, even though it's not something healthy to have every day.
2. Women Who Will Only Eat At Chili's When They're Drunk.
If these women are sober, they’ll tell you how disgusting Chili’s is, and how they would NEVER eat there. But as soon as they’re wasted, they’re like “I am craving for some Chili’s.” Then the next morning they’ll be like “Oh my god, where did we eat last night?” and when you say “Chili’s” they’ll tell you “Don’t get used to eating there. I feel sick.” And sometimes if they’re drunk enough, they’ll wander into Chili’s by accident, because they’ll think they’re someplace else. Then by the time they realize it’s Chili’s, they’re hungry and they’re there, so why not?
3. Women Who Hate Chili's, Even Though They've Never Eaten There.
Unfortunately, there are some girls that absolutely refuse to partake of even the occasional Chili’s dinner, no matter how hungry they might be. They've never eaten there, but they've seen the commercials for it, and they don't like how it looks. If she catches you driving down the street that Chili’s is on, she’ll immediately say “you know I’m not eating at Chili’s right?” even before you’ve asked her if she wants to eat there. You can’t even say, “What if we just get an appetizer?!” Not only do they not like Chili’s, but they look down on girls who do like Chili’s. And if you attempt to bring up a friend of theirs who you heard likes Chili’s, they’ll ask you “how do YOU know she likes Chili’s? Have you been to Chili’s with her?”
4. Women Who Can Not Get Enough Chili's
Then, finally, there’s girls who absolutely love Chili’s. They go to the bar at Chili’s, they watch games at Chili’s, when you’re out on the town and you ask them where they want to eat tonight, they probably won’t bring up Chili’s, but if they’re driving the car, they’ll just drive there and be like “Here we are at Chili’s!”
duschebag: a German purse or suite case? That is the coolest spelling of that word EVER!
I found this place by accident looking for a picture Keyra Augustinas Ass because I had never heard of Keyra Augustina before 5 minutes ago (nice ass!!!) and only heard of her here because I was looking at bad unicorn tatoos which I found because of some some Brock Samson Led Zeppelin trivia link I came upon after trying to find out when the new Venture Brothers is going come on TV so I can download of the internet.
And of course the words "anal sex" caught my eye and I can click on things like that 'cause I use Firefox with Noscript.
10 years ago I was driving on the 101 in northern California when on the Bob and Tom radio show they did a parody of QVC selling Brittany Spears vagina on an infomercial. This was back when B.S.'s virginity was a big deal (hard to imagine now I know)because Disney was making it a big deal I guess. The said in that scratchy voice they had on one and it is so tight even if you buy it you probably aren't gettin' in there. So they were going to throw in a spark plug gapper but you would probably need something like the "jaws of life" to get it open.
I needed new headlights and had to pound out several dents in the grill and hood of my jeep after the accident. My head was bleeding and I still could not stop laughing.
That's how I was laughing 10 minutes ago when reading this thing.
Thanks. Haters you suck. And excuse my while I go find the testicle that just popped out cause I was laughing so hard.
Thing is, I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED CHILIS! (The actual restaurant) Since high school. And have always had a hell of a time getting anyone to go there with me. And no matter how they changed the menu, or often I would get a not so good meal, I was still glad I went and always planned to come back, possibly to the other one acroos town maybe.... so I know IT'S TRUE!
validation words: "pounds codified" That's what I'm talkin' bout!
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
October 4th, 2009 at 01:01 am
duschebag: a German purse or suite case? That is the coolest spelling of that word EVER!
I found this place by accident looking for a picture Keyra Augustinas Ass because I had never heard of Keyra Augustina before 5 minutes ago (nice ass!!!) and only heard of her here because I was looking at bad unicorn tatoos which I found because of some some Brock Samson Led Zeppelin trivia link I came upon after trying to find out when the new Venture Brothers is going come on TV so I can download of the internet.
And of course the words "anal sex" caught my eye and I can click on things like that 'cause I use Firefox with Noscript.
10 years ago I was driving on the 101 in northern California when on the Bob and Tom radio show they did a parody of QVC selling Brittany Spears vagina on an infomercial. This was back when B.S.'s virginity was a big deal (hard to imagine now I know)because Disney was making it a big deal I guess. The said in that scratchy voice they had on one and it is so tight even if you buy it you probably aren't gettin' in there. So they were going to throw in a spark plug gapper but you would probably need something like the "jaws of life" to get it open.
I needed new headlights and had to pound out several dents in the grill and hood of my jeep after the accident. My head was bleeding and I still could not stop laughing.
That's how I was laughing 10 minutes ago when reading this thing.
Thanks. Haters you suck. And excuse my while I go find the testicle that just popped out cause I was laughing so hard.
Thing is, I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED CHILIS! (The actual restaurant) Since high school. And have always had a hell of a time getting anyone to go there with me. And no matter how they changed the menu, or often I would get a not so good meal, I was still glad I went and always planned to come back, possibly to the other one acroos town maybe.... so I know IT'S TRUE!
validation words: "pounds codified" That's what I'm talkin' bout!
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