Explore Holy Taco

Ashlee Simpson To Wed Tiny Creature

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz (pictured here uninterested at Ashley’s offer of a hand job), are now getting married.  People.com reports:

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are getting married, they announced Wednesday.

Simpson’s father, Joe, tells PEOPLE he’s “totally happy” and “so excited to have Pete as part of (our) family.”

“We are blessed,” he says.

That’s only part of the quote from Joe Simpson.  I think the rest of it said “Now I can take the earning power I harness by exploiting my teenage daughter’s breasts and vagina and combine it with the the profit potential of this boy’s effeminate good looks to finally reach the elusive gay and european audiences.  The world will be mine!  MINE! MWAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!”    Then he disappeared in a puff of smoke.

In other news, this may be the physically tiniest couple in the world.  Surpassing Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes.  Look at this picture of them standing next to Brad and Angelina:

2 Responses to "Ashlee Simpson To Wed Tiny Creature"

  1. how tall his he?

  2. Matty D says:

    I didn’t think EMO’s were allowed to get married?