Boy Born With Two Penises. In Related News: World's Happiest Boy Born

March 13th, 2009 | 09:22 am

Russia still has the bomb. And now they have babies with two penises. According to Ananova:

A baby boy born with two penises in Russia has undergone complicated surgery to join them into one.

The child, named by the Russian media only as Artyom G, was born two weeks ago after a normal pregnancy.

He was rushed from his maternity hospital to St Vladimir's Children's Clinical Hospital in Moscow where he underwent the lengthy operation to join the two penises.

"The surgery was complicated. We had to form one penis out of two, make the abdominal wall and create a bladder," said a doctor involved in the five hour operation.

"When our colleagues asked for help we said 'yes' immediately but we couldn't imagine the case would be so complicated."

According to the The Sun, the hospital said that the baby is now in good health and the surgery a complete success.

"He will grow into a normal man and be able to have kids," the doctor added.

Wait, they turned his two penises into one? Why the hell did they do that? This child was given a gift. He was blessed. And with the careless wave of a scalpel they just destroyed what would have been the world's greatest porn career. Because of these thoughtless doctors, we will never see movies titled "Jose And Hose B," "The Penis Always Rings Twice" or "2 Fast 2 Furious." There are no winners in this story.