Bradley Cooper, ‘Sexiest Man Alive’, Photoshopped Onto Men That Are Not Sexy At All

Oh, big f’ing deal! People Magazine named Bradley Cooper the sexiest man alive. I’m not attracted to men, but I guess if you’re into tall, super in-shape dudes with lots of confidence and money, then yes, Bradley Cooper is sexy. But I mean, c’mon. It’s kind of an objective thing, isn’t it? Like, it’s really pretty situational. He’s only sexy because he’s got butt-tons of money and he’s in a bunch of really great movies. But what if he just had a Bradley Cooper head, without that body and that money? We’ve decided it was our duty to take Mr. Cooper down a peg and bring him back to earth. We knocked him out of his starlet-filled orbit by photoshopping his stupid head on to the bodies of unsexy people.

Bradley Cooper? More like Fatley Pooper. BURN!

Why don’t you occupy some clothing Old Man Hippy Brad Cooper. Not even one percent of women want to have sex with you. BURN!

You’re an old man now, Bradley Cooper! SICK BURN!

Nice nipple rings gay beach Brad. Good luck getting in the movies looking like that. They wouldn’t even let this version of Bradley Cooper into the theatre, let alone on the screen. BURN BURN BURN!