Explore Holy Taco

Britney Spears is Drug Free. Yay?

From Popsugar.com

Britney Spears is being held for 72 hours for mental evaluation, but the latest is that she wasn’t under the influence, as was originally suspected. Britney’s blood test came back negative for Drugs and alcohol.

Wait, so all this shit happened and she wasn’t on drugs? Let’s digest what that means for a moment. She went this bat-shit crazy on her own. She’s one step away from what I like to call “Chimpanzee Crazy,” which is when a person goes so nuts they just start flinging their own poo at people and masturbating under shady trees, with reckless abandon. But if you want to know why she’s f-ed up, this is her dad:

He looks like a salty fisherman who lost his job eight years ago and has been living off ketchup packets and Sierra Mist. I’m thinking maybe he’s not number one papa.

{editor’s note} Okay, I feel partially responsible for this seeing as how I put her number 1 on my list of celebrities to die this year. But aren’t we all partially responsible? As human beings?…No, probably just me and her crazy ass family.

4 Responses to "Britney Spears is Drug Free. Yay?"

  1. JoeAnne says:

    She really looks like a drugged person to be honest. What did she took? legal weed smoking or what? Well I hope he will be better during the next few weeks to be honest cause I really love her.

  2. Marie says:

    These people are such white trash. I can’t think of anyone who scores higher on the white trash meter. Except maybe my cousin.

  3. Priya says:

    Poor girl. She is obviously so sick. Poor little kiddies of hers too.

  4. Matt says:

    I really don’t understand why anyone cares about Britney Spears anymore. She hasn’t done anything productive in a long time…. She’s just another dead-beat mom who doesnt give a crap about her own kids.