1)Because I saw that it was a news report about a guy who was upset about golf balls ending up in his yard and I had to know whether or not the local news report was going to say the guy was “teed off.” God I love local news.
2)I love how they think it’s some kind of mysterious phenomenon. The guy lives on a giant amount of land, and any time you live on a giant amount of land, if someone who lives near you has a golf club, there’s a good chance there’s going to be a shitpile of golf balls on your land. I was half way expecting them to show an artists rendition of some sort of monster that is responsible for this madness. God I love local news.
Tow truck drivers are a skilled section of the car care workforce. You can’t just be any jackass with a trailer hitch and expect to know how to properly connect two automobiles with a chain. You need years of schooling, hours of study and extensive on the job training before you can join the ranks of those who drag cars from point A to point B.
This takes some balls. You can pretty much be assured that there’s going to be slow response time to this guys house. If I was a criminal, I’d find out this lawyer’s address and rob him immediately, while the taste of anger is still fresh in the mouth of the police department. Also, one other thing, I don’t feel any real sense of vindication with somebody giving a cop a parking ticket. I once saw a cop break up a fight between two 25o lbs offensive lineman from a college that shall remain nameless, and during the break up, one of the o-line dudes puked on the cop. From that point on I was like “eh, not so great to be a cop.” Now if he had given one of those god forsaken meter maids a ticket…..
I take no political sides here at HolyTaco.com (a prior urinal crapping conviction prohibits me from voting), but this Obama video combines Jay-Z, Ellen Degeneres, Ghostface Killah, Morrissey, Scarlett Johannson‘s boobs, Natalie Portman‘s nipples and LOLCats. Can someone bury this video in a time capsule? That way the people of the future can dig this up 100 years from now and know everything about our culture.
Remember when there weren’t 9 CSI’s and 7 Law and Orders on television? No? Well, there used to be a time when television wasn’t filled with plots about dead hookers and cold cases. A time when you could count on a character to say the same thing, over and over and over again. And you know what? You tuned in every week to hear them say it. And also so that you didn’t have to have an actual conversation with your family at dinner. So, here’s our ode to just some of our favorite catch phrases. Enjoy.
So, there’s a whole bunch of controversy over this video. People think when Obama reaches up and scratches his face with his middle finger, that he’s actually giving the finger to Hillary, who he’s talking about at the moment he scratches. This is what the news media has come to. Reporting on shit like this. And before you say “You’re posting about it too so that makes you as bad as them,” let me answer that by saying that they run a service which is supposed to provide credible information to the public and I run a “service” where I spend an hour trying to photoshop Lindsay Lohan into a group of poor South African children.
Anyway, bottom line is, even if he was giving her the finger, who cares. You know they all want to give each other the finger, they just don’t do it because the finger is bad politics. Although I hear the “put your tongue between your two fingers like you’re giving a woman oral sex” gesture is huge in swing states.
Who needs lame guitars or drums when you can look totally cool playing a kickass beam of light?!?! See that guy with the sunglasses? His sunglasses let us know that he is cool! I bet he gets lots of groupies! And that blonde-haired kid couldn’t look any more bored! Rock!