There’s nothing worse than driving along, minding your own business when you hit a pothole that causes your car to first totally bottom out, and then catch air like your Luke Duke in the General Lee.
Other crap to look at:
SHauna Sand keeps it classy (drunkenstepfather)
Ariadne Artiles hates clothes (gorillamask)
Reka Ebergenyi also hates clothes (doubleviking)
Gabriela Vergara? Yep, hates ‘em too (tastybooze)
Amy Winehouse is a natural beauty (theblemish)
Two girls viciously beat the crap out of each other (nothingtoxic)
Fred loses his meds (EJB)
Maddona’s vaginal concert at Wembley stadium (bestweekever)
Tila Tequila in inked magazine (cameltap)
I’m a sucker for a good “animals screwing behind reporter doing a live broadcast” video. This one I think is extra special for a few reasons. First, I had no idea pig’s made noises like that when they screw. He sounds more like his penis got caught inside her vagina, and that her vagina is going to explode in 10 seconds. Secondly, I love that the pig nudges her several times to let her know he wants to have sex. What man out there hasn’t done basically the exact same thing? Thirdly, I think we can all agree that if there were an asian man helping us while we were doing it, things would go a lot smoother.
The next time you take a plane ride that will involve a little zero gravity, you may want to bring your dog and leave your girlfriend at home. As you can see from these two videos, they have two very different reactions. Here’s what’s going through each of their minds as they hit zero gravity:
Girl: Oh my God oh my God oh my god. Please stop! I want to go home. Don’t! Why did I come on this stupid trip. God I hate planes! Oh no, I’m totally going to puke. Oh God. Here it comes. If I cover my face no one will know. I just puked. Covering my face didn’t work. My glasses are covered in puke and I may have yakked on that bitch next to me. Well, she dragged me on this trip. Stupid bitch. Oh no, I think I might puke again…
Dog: This flight is going pretty nicely. I wonder why they brought me along? Oh hey, I’m floating. Let’s go see what these guys are doing. I wonder if I’ll get some sausages later. Man, I love sausages. Hey guys, what’s up? Whoa, back on the floor now. Are there any sausages down here?
Other crap to look at:
Drum roll please: The Mini Me sex tape hits the Internet today (drunkenstepfather)
Man brutally attacked on subway with sledgehammer (nothingtoxic)
Breanne Ashley is attractive (gorillamask)
A rap battle gets translated (comedy.com)
Jeanette Biedermann in lingerie (cameltap)
Sarita Stella? Also attractive (doubleviking)
Holly Madison and her slut crew (hornyoyster)
A bartender’s worst nightmare (tastybooze)
There’s a new Sarah Palin doll (BestWeekEver)
Jessica Simpson screws up onstage (theblemish)
It’s a song about socks (EJB)
Kendra Wilkinson likes to play dress up (FListed)
When you learn other languages, it’s important that you learn popular phrases that you’ll regularly need. For instance, “Where is the nearest bank,” or “I have a bad case of diarrhea.” I really like that they took the learning process one step further and made a song out of it that’s accompanied with a dance. In fact, the next time I have a bad case of diarrhea, I’m going to turn to my co-worker, tell him, and then do this dance and sing the song. That way I’ve covered all my bases.
I can’t really explain this. I can’t explain why children are playing in a penis slide and I really can’t explain the song that’s playing. I’m not sure why someone made this slide, or why someone would let their child play in it, so I’m just going to let you deal with this on your own. Good luck.
Other crap to look at:
This kid chugs 6 beers in 10 seconds (EJB)
Kristin Cavallari is drunk (drunkenstepfather)
Giorgia Palmas in a bikini (doubleviking)
He’s an awesome human beatbox (cameltap)
Rosie Jones is topless (hornyoyster)
Mentos and Diet Coke Booby Trap (tastybooze)
Rocio Guirao Diaz is attractive (gorillamask)
How Italians do business (funtasticus)
Rumer Willis hates her chin (TheBlemish)
Olician Munn is attractive (Flisted)
If Usher was Vishnu, this is what he would do all day long (BestWeekEver)
Angry bull knocks rider out cold in chute (nothingtoxic)
This is what Linda Blair looks like naked (MrSkin)
The Big Lebowski is 10 years old (BushLeague)
There are tons of theories about how the human race will become extinct. Asteroid has always been my favorite because it’s a super awesome crap your pants moment, but there’s not enough time for people to try to break into my house and steal my bottled water or special edition copy of Predator.
This video kind of speaks for itself, so I’m not going to overanalyze, but here’s a few thoughts that occurred while watching. First of all, I love how the Orgy people thought anyone would think this was a church. It looks like the set of the a Saw film. Secondly, why is it that every time I see a news report about some underground orgy party, everyone is grotesquely ugly or in this case, sound like they work the register at a Dairy Queen in some shit town on he way to Vegas. Thirdly, I can’t tell you how much I love when local news stations put up a picture of the people in question, and it’s the most ridiculous picture they can find. In this case, the couple is shirtless wearing bow ties. I’ve said before, but I shall say it again: Thank God for Local News.
I can’t figure out the worst part about this video. Is it the song, the woman singing the song, the music video itself, or the motorcycle guy’s mullet? They all seem to be equally terrible. So, if two negatives make a positive, then four negatives might make a totally awesome positive. I don’t really understand quantum physics, but using the Copenhagen Interpretation of the Einstein-Podolsky-Rosen paradox*, I think this video has so many negative components that the wave-particle duality actually inverses on itself to become the greatest video in the universe.
I asked a quantum physicist to see if my formula was correct. This was his response:
Quantum Physicist: No, this video sucks. Shut up.
Well, now we have our answer. Still, it’s kind of a catchy tune.
*I have no idea what those terms mean. I found them on wikipedia.
It’s not often that a great orator graces us with his ability to take a very complex situation and turn it into a simple story that makes all of humanity sit back and see the world in a new perspective. History has given us such great speakers as Winston Churchill, Martin Luther King Jr and John F. Kennedy. But now, it gives us…Diddy.
From his opening salvo of “Diddy Obama blog! Diddy Obama blog! Diddy Obama blog! Attention John McCain: My name is…Diddy.” to the scathing probe of “She gonna be on the phone with my man from South Korea and like…what she…I mean? What in theee hell?” As you can see, he’s asking the questions that mainstream media is too scared to ask. I’d like to be the first to thank Diddy for his patriotism, his sense of duty and, most of all, for his willingness to take a dump with his mouth in front of a camera, and then put that dump on the Internet.
Other crap to look at:
Giselle Bundchen is sexy (cameltap)
Shannen Doherty sure has some shorts (drunkenstepfather)
Idiot owned by security gate during earthquake (nothingtoxic)
Superman and Batman tell yo mama jokes (comedy.com)
Kocsis Orsi is hotter than her name (Doubleviking)
Carmen Ortega hates clothes (gorillamask)
Disaster Movie scores a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes (BestWeekEver)
Leighton Meester was a prison baby (TheBlemish)
Florida is full of dumbasses (WithLeather)
University of Texas probably has the best cheerleader outfits (Uncoached)
Watching some athlete hold up some ornate trophy is exciting to only the fans of that athlete/team. But when something goes wrong and the trophy ends up in more than one piece, well, everyone can enjoy that.
5. Marat Safin - Some Tennis Trophy
Note how the guy in the back right of photos three and four continues to clap as he watches it fall on Marat’s head, and ultimately to the ground. His face is saying “Watch out for falling trophy!” but his hands are saying “Bravo!”
4. Kazuhiro Kokubo - The 2007 FIS Snowboard Second Place Trophy
I have no idea what this trophy looked like before it was smashed, but I’m guessing the oh-crap-did-you-just-see-my-trophy-fall-over-and-get-smashed look on his face tells me it was a little bigger than a handle and a small glass rod. Continue reading…
Debate season is in full swing, so we thought it would be a good time to take a look back at some of the most notable blunders in presidential debate history.
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