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Celebritwats: Celebrities Respond to the Black Eyed Peas Halftime Show

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Yesterday’s Superbowl was overshadowed by a mass of ridiculous commercial and a halftime show that was the visual and aural equivalent of being stabbed fro the inside out by a gutful of sharpened golf cleats.  We’re no fans of BEP normally but with any luck yesterday proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that the entire band only exists in a studio where millions of dollars of high tech computer wizardry makes them sound like they’re not seals being burned alive.  Nonetheless, despite their terrifying assault on our senses, not everyone was disgusted.  Shocking?  Yes.  But just what kind of person could watch that halftime show and not be totally offended?

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First up, Martha Stewart.   We have to agree, Fergie did look great.  Few hookers accessorize with sequined epaulets.

This tweet explains a lot by giving us insight into what Avril feels qualifies as perfect.  An imperfect show would likely have involved a prolapsed colon and a mob hit.

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I don’t think Kim Kardashian watches football.  Good use of the word “gorge” however.

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Busta Rhymes was correct, BEP did shut that shit down, in the way an Ebola outbreak might shut down an airport, or someone shitting on the floor temporarily shuts down a Goodwill.  As for the previous statement about this being the best halftime show in years, this may be true if the last several you watched featured Up With People.

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Who the hell is Lea Michele?

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Thank God MC Hammer took the time out of his busy schedule to comment on the historicity of the Black Eyed Peas fouling up Superbowl 45.

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I don’t think Perez Hilton watches football.

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I honestly think New Kid here meant the audio difficulties.  But yeah, you’re right dude.  The sound was bad.

twitterWant to know what it takes to impress a Jonas brother?  Probably not, but now you do anyway – lights.  Know what else is easily impressed by lights?  Fish.  Some birds.  Lizards.  Cats will chase lasers.  Yep.  Good game, everyone.

15 Responses to "Celebritwats: Celebrities Respond to the Black Eyed Peas Halftime Show"

  1. JunkCuenta says:

    I didn’t watch the super bowl but most those tweets could had been summarized as “BEP plz lemme lick your ass or feet!”.

  2. JunkCuenta says:

    I mean, don’t get me wrong I’m no musician, but their tracks are idiotic in my opinion. An excuse for getting high and jumping around like if you were having a seizure.

  3. DonkeyXote says:

    Awesome article! xD

    It was in the news here too how the Black Eyed Peas monumentally failed to keep a note, specially that slut butchering a classic by the mighty Guns FUCKING Roses. You could tell Slash was playing that solo with no hype and slower than usual to match her sucky pitch. What exactly was he expecting to come out of this – if not utter shit – when he decided to lend his shredding skills to a HIP-HOP act??

    • DC1 says:

      I love Guns and Roses myself, but you need to do your homework if you think black eyes peas are hip hop. they might market their music under hip hop, but, I felt myself cringe when you put them in the same genera as the likes of The Roots, Jedi Mind, ect ect.

  4. Julian says:

    lea michele is from glee. The most talked about show of last year. she is the lead.

  5. gresch says:

    fucking funny. especially the busta rhymes one, the mc hammer one, and of course the joe jonas one

  6. P-bizzle says:

    You guys forgot Nick Swardson’s summary:

    “Haha. I like Peas Tron vibe. Audio was a fucking aids fart. Christina doesn’t know our national anthem. She might as well have released a Bin Laden sex tape. And Slash? WTF. Props to Dallas for that stadium. It’s retarded (and when I say that I mean down syndrome).”

    Ok ok, so it was posted on Facebook and not Twitter. But I think we can make an exception here, right?

  7. joel souza says:

    i dont understand how still are people criticizing BEP, they are really awesome, and like it or not, they are the most popular pop band right now, also, Fergie is hot as hell!

    • Ian Fortey says:

      Fergie looks like a dude. But that aside, did you see the halftime show? Because that explains why people criticize the band – they’re a manufactured lie. They get autotuned in studio to be mildly tolerable and when put to the test live they sound worse than the sound your colon would make if wolverines were tearing it out.

  8. joel souza says:

    Besides, Taboo is Mexican, surely you didn`t know that.