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China Bans TV Shows About Time Travel


China’s all sorts of stupid. We all know that. But the Chinese government recently banned all TV show plots that involve time travel, fantasy, and basically anything that requires an imagination to create. Really, though, “banned” is too strong a word. According to the new guidelines set forth by China’s Ministry of Buzzkilling Assholes, time travel and other high fantasy concepts are simply “discouraged.” It should be noted that the Chinese symbol for “discouraged” shares a meaning with the phrase “you will be murdered in a back alley by a government agent disguised as a urine-soaked hobo.”

I feel it’s every nation’s right to produce works of fiction involving time travel. Moving characters forwards or backwards in time is a classic storytelling technique that makes characters confront the concepts of destiny, inevitability, and change. Time travel also carries with it that sense of child-like wonder of understanding where we came from and where we will be as a society. These are all concepts intrinsic to dreaming; of fantasizing; of thinking about something better and trying to figure out how we’re going to cope with something worse that lurks a head.

By “discouraging” time travel, and all other forces of fantasy fiction, China is effectively removing their country’s artist’s ability to paint a vivid picture of a possibly better future for themselves. It’s common knowledge that China is a country ruled with an iron fist, imposing harsh laws upon its citizens, with each new law acting as an even grander display of desperation than the last, but taking away the ability to imagine something grand from screen writers removes the last shred of hope for anyone. We’ve seen it in movies all the time, most recently in Zach Snyder’s Sucker Punch: when people are at their lowest and all hope seems lost, all they are left with is their imagination. If you take away their ability to dream big, you’re taking away the last thing they have.

So, in closing, f*ck you, China. F*ck you.

Also, and this doesn’t have an impact on this article, but in my search to find a news article about this story, I came across this version of it from Fox News. It doesn’t contain any of their usual right wing madness, but it’s still crazy, mostly because of its first line, which is in reference to time travel:

It’s the basis for some of the greatest sci-fi movies of all time — The Terminator, Back to the Future, Black Knight, just to name a few.

Black Knight? The Martin Lawrence movie? Really? Really?! That had better have been a joke, Fox News.

2 Responses to "China Bans TV Shows About Time Travel"

  1. DonkeyXote says:

    Black Night was fucking LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

  2. DonkeyXote says: