Yesterday’s Superbowl was overshadowed by a mass of ridiculous commercial and a halftime show that was the visual and aural equivalent of being stabbed fro the inside out by a gutful of sharpened golf cleats. We’re no fans of BEP normally but with any luck yesterday proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that the entire band only exists in a studio where millions of dollars of high tech computer wizardry makes them sound like they’re not seals being burned alive. Nonetheless, despite their terrifying assault on our senses, not everyone was disgusted. Shocking? Yes. But just what kind of person could watch that halftime show and not be totally offended?
First up, Martha Stewart. We have to agree, Fergie did look great. Few hookers accessorize with sequined epaulets.
This tweet explains a lot by giving us insight into what Avril feels qualifies as perfect. An imperfect show would likely have involved a prolapsed colon and a mob hit.
I don’t think Kim Kardashian watches football. Good use of the word “gorge” however.
Busta Rhymes was correct, BEP did shut that shit down, in the way an Ebola outbreak might shut down an airport, or someone shitting on the floor temporarily shuts down a Goodwill. As for the previous statement about this being the best halftime show in years, this may be true if the last several you watched featured Up With People.
Who the hell is Lea Michele?
Thank God MC Hammer took the time out of his busy schedule to comment on the historicity of the Black Eyed Peas fouling up Superbowl 45.
I don’t think Perez Hilton watches football.
I honestly think New Kid here meant the audio difficulties. But yeah, you’re right dude. The sound was bad.
Want to know what it takes to impress a Jonas brother? Probably not, but now you do anyway – lights. Know what else is easily impressed by lights? Fish. Some birds. Lizards. Cats will chase lasers. Yep. Good game, everyone.