If there's one thing we like to do more than drink, it's argue about really important stuff like are strip clubs good or bad. Here's what it sounds like when when we do both at the same time.
Drunken Argument Against Strip Clubs:
Hey guys, I have a shitty idea! Let's blow $500 on a night out and NOT get laid. Doesn't that sound awesome? Yeah, so, first, we'll pay a really huge cover to get into a "bar" that looks like it was last cleaned in 1984. And then once we get there, we'll get to pay $15 for a watered down vodka tonic. And if that's not enough, we'll also get to see totally busted chicks caked in makeup...are you ready?...NAKED! Because if there's one thing that gives me a boner it's being surrounded by moist, gunked up carpet and shitty drinks. AMIRIGHT?!?!? Yes, dude. And if we're really feeling lucky, we'll get to pay them even more money to rub their used-up bodies all over us! But we can't touch them. Or have sex with them (unless we want to pay even more! Wink wink!)
Doesn't that sound awesome? I mean, it would be a waste of time to go to a boring old "regular" bar where we would pay a lot less but have the chance to meet girls we could actually have sex with, right?
Drunken Argument For Strip Clubs:
Let's see here, what happens when you walk into a strip club? A half-naked woman takes me to my table and then an actual naked woman shoves her big-ass boobs and her big-ass ass in my face for $20. Hmm, yeah, that's really a bad time. Then, when I'm done with that I sit there and watch some other naked girl swing around on a pole to Bon Jovi's "You Give Love A Bad Name" or Motley Crue's "Girls Girls Girls." Oh, man. How can I stand it?
I mean, I can think of absolutely zero things wrong with spending an evening like that. Sure, it costs a little more than one of those regular bars that are full of fat guys and girls with their clothes on, but that's why I have a job. If I'm gonna spend my money, I'd rather spend a little more to get slapped around by some melons. And if you have any kind of game, you'd know that you can date strippers just as easily as you can any regular girls. And they know a helluva lot more in the sack than the wasted fatty you're dragging back to your apartment at 3 am. You're a shitty dumbass who's afraid of tits. Get a job.
Now it's your turn to chime in. Just follow these easy steps:
Step 1: Drink 7 beers
Step 2: Vote (You can vote as often as you want. Just refresh the page to vote again or see the newest results)
Step 3: Type whatever stream of consciousness bullshit that comes into your head on this topic in the comment section.
Step 4: Continue being awesome
(Note: Poll results--no pun intended--are slightly delayed.)
It,s like being real thirsty, going into a bar and paying to have an ice cold frosty mug of beer put in front of you and not even being able to drink it.
Ya, fun eh?
it's more like having that beer poured all over your head/face and rubbed against your genitals all the while you're not allowed to touch or taste it. but yeah I agree.
you people seem to be going to the wrong strip clubs. the only time the girls at the one I go to don't let you touch them is if the owner is around or if vice is in the house.
I dont mind strip clubs, but I wouldnt pay $40 just to see hot naked women. If your smart you can find the good clubs where cover is $25 and byob and still see hot women with out c-section scars and bullet wounds. Why be a dumbass and pay that much???
The one I go to charges $20 to get in. Fortunately, this is Texas so since it's all nude, that also means it's BYOB, so no over priced drinks (unless you want soda or water, you pussy).
Preach the truth brother! My life is about Harley's and Strippers. There's nothing better than these two. Especially at the sam time. And all nude is the only way to go. I'll do the topless clubs if that's all that's available. And I'll have a great time doing it. Glad to see some others out there that share's in my opinion.
And for all of you sissy little pricks that want to complain about the cost, stay home, whine and drink your milk you little mama's boys. Leave the Strippers and expensive drinks to us men that work and play hard and don't mind sharing our money with beautiful girls!
No, its not that 66.7% are Fags, its just that the ones against Strip Clubs have the time to vote, over and over again, while they're NOT having titties rubbed on their face. Now, if you'll exscuse me, I'm going to get some titties rubbed on my face... Junior, stay in the car, here's a bottle, some crackers, and daddy promises to leave the window cracked a bit.
100% of people that use fake stats are annoying and should never comment ever agian. If more than half of us are fags then stop reading the web site. Go play d and d or wow but get off holy taco.
Best comment ever in a strip club... my buddy was talking to a recently re-boobed chick, who I guess they did the surgery from her back... you know, not to scar the titties...
You obviously never had a lap dance. Twenty at most places, and if you have to get a fat chick drunk then you really have problems. I let the fat ones get me drunk and then they might get luck...
If you don't like strip clubs, you're gay, plain and simple. What's wrong with spending $5 to get tits shoved in your face? You don't have to pay for the $20 lap dance unless you're really horny, and then it's a simple decision. Man up and hit up some Brad's Gold Club (club of choice here)
Strip clubs are a super waste of time, and completely without reason. For the same amount of money your probably going to have to spend to watch a girl swing around on a pole, and/or give you a lap dance, (and let's not forget cover charges) well, you could get A HOOKER. Say it with me: "HOOKER." I think the last time I went to a strip club and had a really good time, I ended up spending somewhere along the lines of 200.00 USD. And, I didn't even get laid. I think the last time I was with a hooker and had a really good time, it cost me somewhere around 150.00 USD, and that's just because before we did the deed I asked her, to, guess what? Give me a lap dance beforehand.
So, the way I see it is :
1) You can go to a strip club and get fucked out of about two hundred dollars.
Or.
2) You can get a hooker and get fucked for about two hundred dollars.
Case closed. Strip clubs are a waste of money, or at least not the wisest expenditure.
Poor bastard! You obviously have no game and therefore you ARE wasting your money at a strip club. I've found the girls there to have an incredible sense of humor and are a lot of fun to hang out with. And if you're going there just to get laid then you've chosen the wrong place to go. It's like riding a Harley. If I have to explain it to you then you wouldn't understand.
And I'm glad you don't like going because little girlies like yourself are a nuisance to us men that really do like these women. And the best sex on earth is from a stripper. Of course with no game you'll never experience this. Shame!
Pregame...bring only cash...The Penthouse...$10 cover...$5 for full nude area...$2 per lap dance...done.
A buddy of mine only had a dollar and the stripper wanted another dollar so he dug around in his pocket and snapped his ATM receipt under her G string...classy.
Soon the strippers will fight for your tips as they look at themselves in the mirror.
You go to see chicks work it for you...no yappity bullshit then you leave and try to get drunk sex from your pissed off woman...hoping she doesnt see titty glitter or smell stripper perfume.
Strip clubs are only expensive if you're trying to show off.
WHAAA??? $2 lap dances??!?!? theres either A LOT of strip clubs nearby or this must be the strip club in the ghetto or trailer park... or you live in mexico. the strip club i went to charged $20 and it was a hole in the wall that constantly got charged for prostitution and drugs
"El Mojo" Youve been talking shit about every1 here about them being nerds etc. still, youre the one here whom regulary goes to stripclubs, also youve commented 10 times on one HT thread.
Get a girl worth keeping and stick with her bitch.
I worked in a strip club for about 10 years. I can nail a stripper just as easy as some other bimbo at a regular bar. You just have to know how to talk to them. Most just want sex and not a relationship.
we've got a primo strip club that costs ten bucks to get in, and while the drinks are expensive, if you're smart you get liquored up long before you get there, then sip on one beer all night. after that, it's the only place in the world any bitch will rub her tits all over you for one dollar. seriously. two tits for a dollar. any male who argues against strip clubs in this thread is doing so because his girlfriend is standing over his shoulder.
I can speak for yall but any dude in a serious relationship; strip clubs is for us! I like to wear no underwear and a pair of jogging pants so when i get a lap dance. She rubbing all up on my slong. Well worth the 20 bucks, also invest in a flask.
Once you find a $20 dollar flask, buy a $20 dollar bottle of alcohol, then go out and spend $20 dollars to look at a naked girl, then spend $20 getting a cab ride home. you cant drive because you drank too much because you wanted that girl to look somewhat attractive thus justifying spending $100 to go home an jerk off to your drunken limp dick.
(54 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
May 1st, 2009 at 03:44 pm
Did you say "Jon Bon's" ... that is the gayest thing I've ever heard of in my life. Even gayer than their music.
May 1st, 2009 at 03:46 pm
That was supposed to be tongue in cheek, but it doesn't make sense. I changed it.
May 1st, 2009 at 04:30 pm
ur a fag, admit it
May 2nd, 2009 at 02:46 pm
urz cantz spellz admitz itz!
May 1st, 2009 at 03:47 pm
It,s like being real thirsty, going into a bar and paying to have an ice cold frosty mug of beer put in front of you and not even being able to drink it.
Ya, fun eh?
May 1st, 2009 at 04:21 pm
it's more like having that beer poured all over your head/face and rubbed against your genitals all the while you're not allowed to touch or taste it. but yeah I agree.
May 1st, 2009 at 06:35 pm
Or you can go to a regular bar, and with your analogy.... settle for the nastiest beer available.... and have as much as you want......
May 1st, 2009 at 06:36 pm
you people seem to be going to the wrong strip clubs. the only time the girls at the one I go to don't let you touch them is if the owner is around or if vice is in the house.
May 1st, 2009 at 03:58 pm
I cant believe 66.7 % of Taco's people are FAGS!!!!
WTF I make the entire night with just 40 bucks
May 1st, 2009 at 04:04 pm
$40? That usually is the cost of the cover alone. Are you going to a strip club in a garbage can?
May 1st, 2009 at 06:32 pm
I dont mind strip clubs, but I wouldnt pay $40 just to see hot naked women. If your smart you can find the good clubs where cover is $25 and byob and still see hot women with out c-section scars and bullet wounds. Why be a dumbass and pay that much???
May 2nd, 2009 at 08:49 am
I pay forty bucks taking into consideration my gas money for like 4 days, so, 20 bucks cover and 20 bucks for gas, and i take my own Drinks.
May 6th, 2009 at 07:32 am
If I'm paying for any hoe, its to see the c-section scars, bullet wounds and the friggin' paw prints.
I thought thats what we all went there for.
You know, besides the tits, ass and misogynistic atmosphere.
May 1st, 2009 at 06:34 pm
The one I go to charges $20 to get in. Fortunately, this is Texas so since it's all nude, that also means it's BYOB, so no over priced drinks (unless you want soda or water, you pussy).
May 1st, 2009 at 06:51 pm
Hell yeah, and yeee fucking haw, a fellow texan like me. Exactly how I do it. I dont to the topless shit. Tell these boys how we do it.
December 17th, 2009 at 02:27 pm
Preach the truth brother! My life is about Harley's and Strippers. There's nothing better than these two. Especially at the sam time. And all nude is the only way to go. I'll do the topless clubs if that's all that's available. And I'll have a great time doing it. Glad to see some others out there that share's in my opinion.
And for all of you sissy little pricks that want to complain about the cost, stay home, whine and drink your milk you little mama's boys. Leave the Strippers and expensive drinks to us men that work and play hard and don't mind sharing our money with beautiful girls!
May 1st, 2009 at 04:21 pm
No, its not that 66.7% are Fags, its just that the ones against Strip Clubs have the time to vote, over and over again, while they're NOT having titties rubbed on their face. Now, if you'll exscuse me, I'm going to get some titties rubbed on my face... Junior, stay in the car, here's a bottle, some crackers, and daddy promises to leave the window cracked a bit.
May 2nd, 2009 at 10:59 pm
100% of people that use fake stats are annoying and should never comment ever agian. If more than half of us are fags then stop reading the web site. Go play d and d or wow but get off holy taco.
May 1st, 2009 at 04:05 pm
fake tits are boring and i would rather have real ones that i can grab all night long.
May 1st, 2009 at 06:43 pm
Fake tits boring.... opposed to exciting dancing tities that are real...hmmmm.... and I guess for some reason your unable to grab fake titties...
May 1st, 2009 at 04:42 pm
Strip clubs are cool when you're 17
Rather hit up a club where, if you're not a complete scrub, you get almost any chick you want
May 1st, 2009 at 06:37 pm
The same applies to strip clubs if you have game which apparently you dont...
May 2nd, 2009 at 12:34 pm
Did you actually use the word "game" unironically?
May 1st, 2009 at 04:47 pm
Strip Club alternative: Get a bottle of vodka at the grocery/liquor store and just watch porn online
Get your preference (MILF, Latina, Ebony, Real Tits, etc), and can watch a chick (who'll be a lot hotter)do pretty much anything
May 1st, 2009 at 06:46 pm
You dont get out much do you? I bet you play world of warcraft and have an e-girlfriend.
May 1st, 2009 at 06:01 pm
Best comment ever in a strip club... my buddy was talking to a recently re-boobed chick, who I guess they did the surgery from her back... you know, not to scar the titties...
"I think I saw her Godzilla suit zipper"
May 1st, 2009 at 06:17 pm
i love strip clubs cause i can't get enough of hysterectomy scars, bullet wounds & paw print tattoos
May 1st, 2009 at 06:37 pm
Lap dance $70. Get the fat chick drunk $50. you do the math
May 1st, 2009 at 06:46 pm
You obviously never had a lap dance. Twenty at most places, and if you have to get a fat chick drunk then you really have problems. I let the fat ones get me drunk and then they might get luck...
May 1st, 2009 at 06:52 pm
If you don't like strip clubs, you're gay, plain and simple. What's wrong with spending $5 to get tits shoved in your face? You don't have to pay for the $20 lap dance unless you're really horny, and then it's a simple decision. Man up and hit up some Brad's Gold Club (club of choice here)
May 1st, 2009 at 10:11 pm
Srip Clubs are the shit. Specially when you know what to say to the girls.
And I haven't been to one where they dont let you touch them. That sounds horrible.
May 2nd, 2009 at 03:38 am
Strip clubs are a super waste of time, and completely without reason. For the same amount of money your probably going to have to spend to watch a girl swing around on a pole, and/or give you a lap dance, (and let's not forget cover charges) well, you could get A HOOKER. Say it with me: "HOOKER." I think the last time I went to a strip club and had a really good time, I ended up spending somewhere along the lines of 200.00 USD. And, I didn't even get laid. I think the last time I was with a hooker and had a really good time, it cost me somewhere around 150.00 USD, and that's just because before we did the deed I asked her, to, guess what? Give me a lap dance beforehand.
So, the way I see it is :
1) You can go to a strip club and get fucked out of about two hundred dollars.
Or.
2) You can get a hooker and get fucked for about two hundred dollars.
Case closed. Strip clubs are a waste of money, or at least not the wisest expenditure.
May 3rd, 2009 at 05:31 pm
hear, hear. Monging ftw.
December 17th, 2009 at 02:47 pm
Poor bastard! You obviously have no game and therefore you ARE wasting your money at a strip club. I've found the girls there to have an incredible sense of humor and are a lot of fun to hang out with. And if you're going there just to get laid then you've chosen the wrong place to go. It's like riding a Harley. If I have to explain it to you then you wouldn't understand.
And I'm glad you don't like going because little girlies like yourself are a nuisance to us men that really do like these women. And the best sex on earth is from a stripper. Of course with no game you'll never experience this. Shame!
May 2nd, 2009 at 08:10 am
Pregame...bring only cash...The Penthouse...$10 cover...$5 for full nude area...$2 per lap dance...done.
A buddy of mine only had a dollar and the stripper wanted another dollar so he dug around in his pocket and snapped his ATM receipt under her G string...classy.
Soon the strippers will fight for your tips as they look at themselves in the mirror.
You go to see chicks work it for you...no yappity bullshit then you leave and try to get drunk sex from your pissed off woman...hoping she doesnt see titty glitter or smell stripper perfume.
Strip clubs are only expensive if you're trying to show off.
May 2nd, 2009 at 04:13 pm
win
May 3rd, 2009 at 06:22 pm
WHAAA??? $2 lap dances??!?!? theres either A LOT of strip clubs nearby or this must be the strip club in the ghetto or trailer park... or you live in mexico. the strip club i went to charged $20 and it was a hole in the wall that constantly got charged for prostitution and drugs
May 2nd, 2009 at 11:01 am
I generally don't have enough money to go to a strip club.
So, for the money that I do have -- why waste it?
May 3rd, 2009 at 05:07 pm
I generally I have the money but I don't have a strip club to go to!
Too funny to let it go: seat belt for baby fail
http://www.epiclosers.com/load/8-1-0-294
May 2nd, 2009 at 12:39 pm
Strip clubs are for people who are afraid to actually talk to real women. There's also the whole creepy misogynistic vibe to the whole thing...
May 3rd, 2009 at 10:05 am
"El Mojo" Youve been talking shit about every1 here about them being nerds etc. still, youre the one here whom regulary goes to stripclubs, also youve commented 10 times on one HT thread.
Get a girl worth keeping and stick with her bitch.
May 3rd, 2009 at 02:13 pm
I worked in a strip club for about 10 years. I can nail a stripper just as easy as some other bimbo at a regular bar. You just have to know how to talk to them. Most just want sex and not a relationship.
May 3rd, 2009 at 05:09 pm
You are right most of them just want to spread aids!
Too funny to let it go: seat belt for baby fail
http://www.epiclosers.com/load/8-1-0-294
May 3rd, 2009 at 05:18 pm
Lol... way to fail at life.
May 3rd, 2009 at 05:39 pm
^^ epic-est of epic wins.
May 4th, 2009 at 05:14 am
we've got a primo strip club that costs ten bucks to get in, and while the drinks are expensive, if you're smart you get liquored up long before you get there, then sip on one beer all night. after that, it's the only place in the world any bitch will rub her tits all over you for one dollar. seriously. two tits for a dollar. any male who argues against strip clubs in this thread is doing so because his girlfriend is standing over his shoulder.
Boosh. Fuck ya'll.
May 4th, 2009 at 06:33 am
I can speak for yall but any dude in a serious relationship; strip clubs is for us! I like to wear no underwear and a pair of jogging pants so when i get a lap dance. She rubbing all up on my slong. Well worth the 20 bucks, also invest in a flask.
Bubba
May 4th, 2009 at 12:55 pm
And shockingly, you're still single.
May 4th, 2009 at 03:22 pm
Once you find a $20 dollar flask, buy a $20 dollar bottle of alcohol, then go out and spend $20 dollars to look at a naked girl, then spend $20 getting a cab ride home. you cant drive because you drank too much because you wanted that girl to look somewhat attractive thus justifying spending $100 to go home an jerk off to your drunken limp dick.
i believe the kids nowadays say SNAP!
May 4th, 2009 at 07:46 am
Fuck the http://www.authspot.com/Poetry/Pain-of-Lost-Love.638701
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