So, I know most of you, including myself, can’t sit through a clip from “The Ellen Degeneres Show,” so in order for me to post it on this site, I’ve taken the liberty of inserting a distraction in the clip that should allow you to get through it while retaining enough information to make the stuff I’m going to write about it make sense. You can thank me later for braving through this sans elephant shit eating.
So Ellen is off the market. I’m not sure if this really disappointing for Lesbians or if Lesbians are grossed out by Ellen too. I’m not very familiar with Lesbian culture. In fact, most of what I know about it came from this porno my brother thought he had sufficiently hid from me when I was in 7th grade. If I go by that, all I can really say about Lesbians is that they will do ANYTHING to seal the deal in a job interview. Anything. So, if you’re lesbian and you’re reading this, please let me know your thoughts on Ellen.
Anyway, I can never really understand why people get so worked up about letting gay people get married. There’s nothing anyone has ever really wanted to do, that they couldn’t still do if gay people were married. People say that it cheapens the sanctity of marriage, but those people have never been to Christmas at my Aunt and Uncle’s apartment when she gets drunk and tells him she “can’t wait till their kids are old enough to fend for their f*&king selves so I can get out of this shithole.” I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure they cheapen the sanctity of marriage.