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A Flowchart That Describes 90% of All Porno Movies

Every guy at some point has wished they were a pornstar.  So, if that dream ever comes true, we’ve decided to help you out by showing you how to maneuver your way through 90% of the porno movies made.
 

87 Responses to "A Flowchart That Describes 90% of All Porno Movies"

  1. FPM says:

    I used to be a stunk cock in homeless rodeo clown porn but not any more. Now I am a world class magician !

  2. Anonymous says:

    everyone should chill, its meant to be a joke, just shut up and enjoy the humour of it all.

  3. Anonymous says:

    yes everyone dip! the world will be a much better place

  4. Anonymous says:

    how many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, one to do the lightbulb and one to SUCK MY COCK.

  5. Andrew in NJ says:

    Let’s bring this site back to the business it’s set up for….I’m looking for 100 cute late teens / early twenties girls for a massive BLOW JOB VIDEO…where (and here’s the twist)
    THEY ALL TAKE TURNS BLOWING ME….POST HERE TO GET ON THE LIST OF LUCKY BABES

  6. Anonymous says:

    Touche

  7. Anonymous says:

    you people suck!

  8. Anonymous says:

    and the chart is funny but everyone who is arguing like little baby’s…you people suck!

  9. Anonymous says:

    I’m sorry, I didn’t this one…
    How bad do want this job?…Blow load on face…You’ll be doing a lot of overtime

  10. Anonymous says:

    wow what a bunch of cunt fuck bastards on this comment board. why’d i read it?

  11. You say “cunt fuck bastards on this comment board” like it’s some new revelation for you.

    WELCOME TO THE INTERNET!

  12. Anonymous says:

    this will make directing my pornos much easier

  13. Boom1 says:

    Nice joke where´s a little bit truth also! Congrats on your hard work!

  14. Pratik says:

    To all the hostile Anonymous people out there, switch to decaf.

    To everyone else, calm down. Have some dip.

  15. Mike Oxbig says:

    We provide a service that lets the average guy star and direct his own porn movie.. check it out!!

  16. Anonymous says:

    Aw man, NOW you tell me.

    \\Not at the burn unit.

  17. There’s a VERY important step missing from this flowchart!

    “Cut a hole in the bottom of the pizza box > *WAIT FOR THE SCALDING PIZZA GREASE TO COOL YOU IDIOT* > put your penis through the hole in the box”

    Now it’s perfect. :D

  18. dick eater says:

    did someone say there was dick on the menu?
    yum.
    go have cry-wank you little bitches.
    oh yeah, your mom shit in my bed last night too, owes me some sheet money. trick.

  19. Anonymous #5 says:

    wow do you guys go out for coffee or out for comments?

  20. Anyonumuos says:

    How do we get our screen names to highlight in blue so people can click into our porn sites?

  21. Anonymous says:

    “Oh look, the neighbours pony just walked in”

  22. Looool excellent flow chart!

  23. Dom says:

    These comments are great. Everyone getting their panties in a bunch over dick in a pizza box and load blowing on the facial regions. Chill the fuck out. The Taco is getting blown up by asshats.

  24. TrillVille says:

    can’t you just feel the love?

    BTW, The Japan part was hilarious.

  25. repornlickin says:

    I’d stick a cherry popsicle up my ass if I could hug Obama and get a picture of it to hang on my cell wall.

  26. Badguy says:

    man, the comments are awesome, this is great.
    truly a buncha complete fucktards.

    lol, I love this site.

    have a good one, keep up the fun comments.

  27. Rara says:

    I’ve watched hundreds of pornography movies and none of them have any females in them. More to the point, gay sex is superior cause heteros can’t even fuck each other without a lump of plastic or cucumber-like vegetable.

    The sexual dynamic of one submissive and one dominating is inferior to one in which roles can reserved at will. Also because the gender is the same the feelings are mutual and the sexuality is more reciprocal, more understanding and just better. In short it is at least twice as good.

  28. Anonymous says:

    Wow, you have to be the stupidest person I’ve noticed in a long time. Bush isn’t even comparable to Carter in intelligence. Carter is a noble prize winner, and as for Obama, he’s probably as smart as Carter, if not smarter. No comparison at all with Bush, who is obviously the stupidest president we’ve ever had, with the possible exception of Harding. If you don’t know who that is, read a book sometime. Wait, you’re a Bush supporter. You don’t know how to read, my apologies.

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  30. tlw says:

    lol nice chart , had a laugh
    http://www.toplinkworld.com

  31. Tidson says:

    lol how did you go from porn to politics

    Adult Live TV Free

  32. WTFstunt says:

    Good old Jimmy Carter makes Bush look like a genius! Obama will make Jimmy look good!

  33. Jay Vickers says:

    @Poor world you’re a fucking moron, how can you hate on people for finding humor in their everyday lives? Just because the economy is collapsing doesn’t mean people should stop enjoying humor all together, ya fuckin’ douche.

  34. Anonymous says:

    69th response!

  35. Buddy Ice says:

    Dude, if you order the pizza then YOU have to GIVE the blow job. The delivery man is the one who gets the blow job.

  36. Poor girl says:

    vote it to pay regard to your mother love http://www.authspot.com/Poetry/A-Regard-to-Sweet-Mother.549007

  37. Poor world says:

    Lol people are searching about research on porno movies but do you actually search about What caused the world financial crisis

  38. Anonymous says:

    The crisis has happened…and there’s very little we can do except call for a pizza and get a blow job!

  39. Anonymous says:

    Oops, meant Nobel prize, sorry about that.

  40. Anonymous says:

    FUCK U ALL ASSHOLES

  41. stdg says:

    Good morning to you too, sunshine.

  42. Anonymous says:

    Fully agree with you.
    http://www.dippole.ru/

  43. Ah-nonny-moose says:

    You really think that dolt, who oddly decided to disperse his back-water political idiocy on a porn post, knows the difference between Nobel and noble? I’d bet you two grand he doesn’t.

  44. DanaMateiciuc says:

    I don’t so much see this as a guide to porn… but more of a guide to life.

  45. Metalyca says:

    I don’t so much see this as a guide to porn… but more of a guide to life.
    If you want free porn you go in free porn site you go on http://bangbull.com

  46. Anonymous says:

    i think ill go to tacobell……you people suck!

  47. msn nicknames says:

    what if have a look at http://topinfoblog.com/msn-nick-names/

  48. My Mom says:

    There should be an arrow that goes to you watching Obama fuck the country with his stimulus plan.

    Pump,pump,pump……squirt, all over U.S. taxpayers.

  49. Couch Dress says:

    While simultaneously George W. Bush gives you repeated cream pies for two consecutive terms, not figuratively speaking with America as a whole, but you personally.

  50. Anonymous says:

    true.

  51. Anonymous says:

    …trickle down economics?

    /Flees!

  52. IAMFROMTHEFUTURE says:

    Attention all of you arguing over Obama in the beginning of his presidency, I Am from 2010 and everything continues to get considerably worse.

  53. Anonymous says:

    Morons!

  54. Anonymous4 says:

    Does that mean you’ve been teabagged?

  55. Anonymous says:

    whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapotwhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapwhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapotot whowhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapotoo whoooo im a twhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapoteapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapotwhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapotwhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapotwhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapotwhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapotwhoooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo im a teapot whooo whoooo

  56. Anonymous says:

    The only thing funnier than the pic are the fuckin’ comments.

  57. Anonymynonousymsnous says:

    Bring on the donkey!

  58. Sly Boogy says:

    how did this go from porn to politics? The random spewing thoughts of idiots

  59. Anonymous says:

    NOTHING could make Bush look like a genius. NOTHING.

  60. White Power Girl says:

    Who?…. oh yeah, the ex president,
    Is that still current then?
    No, I didn’t think so douche.
    Get over it, he’s gone and now we have
    a new asshat that will make Bush look
    like an economic genius after he gets
    done screwing us. At least we’ll only
    have 4 years to deal with this clown.

  61. Couch Dress says:

    Yeah white power girl, you’re both ignorant and fucking foolish. I’m sure you’ll win a ton of arguments by defending the Bush presidency, bravo. Go learn how to read you racist hick bitch, then pick up a newspaper and educate yourself. You’re the reason racism still lives and presidents like George W. Bush get two terms.

  62. Anonymous says:

    HA!… gah… ehhh ahahahhaaha

    Nice one

  63. Anyonumuos says:

    I’ll cum in your box of rocks and nunchuck your ass you damn liberal zombie.

  64. repornlickin says:

    A republican, posting red-state kool-aid, on a porn website? I’m very glad no stereotypical hypocrisies have been harmed in the making of this post.

  65. timmy the dying boy says:

    Oh yeah, wise guy, how about a box of rocks? Just so long as the box isn’t a very big one.

  66. Anonymous says:

    im hungry and you people suck

  67. Anonymous says:

    you people like anal….and suck!

  68. Anonymous says:

    What’s sadder? Him getting “dugg” wrong, or you getting “burried” wrong? LOL

  69. Anonymous says:

    It’s buried you fucking cum guzzler

  70. My vote goes to both for wasting their time arguing over made-up internet words.

  71. JOhn Davis says:

    Wow, priceless dude. Love it!

    RT
    http://www.anonymity.eu.tc

  72. Anonymous says:

    LOL DONGS

  73. Anonymous says:

    eat a dick, you fucking piece of shit loser faggot

  74. Anonymous says:

    calm the fuck down you shit rubber

  75. Metalyca says:

    lol

  76. Anonymous says:

    Grats, fucktard. You pointed out how the joke was a joke.

  77. IndianaMike says:

    awesome. love the definitive “you are in a dream/fantasy sequence”, because really what else is there by way of set-up when it comes to porno?

  78. Anonymous says:

    yeall suck clitydick.

  79. RoboPanda says:

    I digged it for the Japan part.

  80. RoboPanda says:

    Dugg. You dugg it. Fucking diggers are fucking retarded. The god damn website even uses Dugg and burried, but you idiots say digged and digged down.

  81. did you rub spit on your penis > yes > have anal sex

    haha hilarious.

  82. What are you think about??

  83. Anonymous says:

    Don’t get too butt-hurt Couch just because someone insulted your god.

  84. Anonymous says:

    works for me :)

  85. his mom says:

    hey look it’s like my thumb is my cock