Flowcharts are a great way to make sense out of confusing scenarios, and there's no scenario that's more confusing than trying to figure out what religion you should follow. That's why we've created this helpful flowchart to guide you through the process:
Actually "bald" is a hair colour. Think "bald eagle" = white headed eagle. Check out any good dictionary.
And that is a good place to check out "atheism". Any "ism" is the belief or philosophy or system espousing a particular beleif. If one thinks there is no god, and acts on that assumption they are living out their worldview, and probably doing so "religiously" otherwise neither they nor anyone else would know they held those beliefs.
My dictionary says that atheism is a "disbelief in the existence of God, (or gods)" A disbelief is nevertheless a belief. "Belief" the dictionary says is "a firm opinion or conviction, an acceptance, etc.
Atheism is just the lack of belief in a god. Atheist = non-believer.
Sure, you can call a lack of belief a belief, but that just sounds silly.
It is interesting how religious people often want to group atheists into their 'believer' category.
What do we call someone that lacks a belief in Santa?
People, let's just all get along. :) Try to be kind and tolerant of others. It should not matter if your neighbor is a Christian, atheist, Pagan, Pastafarian, Muslim or Jew.
@Macsen:
That is not true. You better read up on your statement:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agnosticism
I cite:
"the view that the question of the existence or nonexistence of a deity or deities and the nature of ultimate reality is unknowable by reason of our natural inability to verify any experience with anything but another subjective experience. A strong agnostic would say, "I cannot know whether a deity exists or not, and neither can you." "
STRONG Belief is biologicaly the same as fact in the recesses of the human mind. Try to convince someone who fervently believes something that their fact is wrong and it doesn't compute in their minds. They must discover a greater truth in their own good time.
Grammar Nazis? I only saw definitions be nitpicked in this thread, there was nothing mentioned about grammar. Someone needs to bone up on 8th grade English.
dear kieth, bald is not a hair color, but it is a hair style. in my eyes, we can compare balds to athiests, catholics to wavy hair and jews to the jew fro
and Hinduism is monotheistic. They just say god is to complex to put into any one form, so they have "ton's of 'em" but they are all just various manifestations or interpretations of the the various aspects of the one god.
Vishnu:
I think a majority of Hindus understand this but still have "favorite" forms of God so in a sense they do worship many somewhat like Catholics worship many saints knowing their is only one real power in their Heaven.
PS: Some Native Americans say "All gods are one god".
Nic:
The Buddhists I know view the Universe itself as the ultimate power so in a lot of ways that makes them monotheistic.
Bruno:
You're falling into the arrogant trap that the only definition of God is the NeoCon/Fundamentalist/Evangelical Christian definition. That's very narrow minded and limiting of you.
There are many Jews who believe in (essentially) the same God and yet they couldn't give a rat's butt if you are gay. Many Bible/Torah scholars are convinced that King David himself was bisexual.
There are also many more liberal Christians who are happy to fully accept gays (look at some of the Episcopals) and believe if you are gay then God made you that way and that is the way you are supposed to be by design.
Finally, many of the pagan gods and goddesses not only accept gays, some of them ARE gay or bisexual according to their historic mythologies.
The word "God" does not exclusively/automatically mean "Big Mean Dad of Jesus" even a little bit. Open your mind.
To Bruno, who says, "I'm gay. Why would I believe in someone who hates me?": Why have such a narrow view of yourself? You are not merely "gay", you a human being, created in the image of God. He doesn't hate you - he loves you, and Jesus Christ died so that you could be freed from the sins that keep you tied down, and elevated to the status of a child of God and an inheritor of eternal life. If that isn't good news, I don't know what is! Peace and love my good man!
i agree, most jews are fucking criminals, the worst kind, christians might make war on brown people based on lies but at least they are honest about it, muslims are honest too, if they hate you they say it in front of you
but not fucking jews, they pretend to be your friend and then they stab you in the back
sieg heil you sheep fucking racist assholes. eat shit and die you ignorant fucks. the world would be a better place if both of you lip locked the end of a gun and pulled the trigger. do that if you can find enough time out of your busy day of crazy internet conspiracy theories, playing with your own shit, and goose stepping around your parents basement in high heels, a bra and a flashlight shoved up your ass.
love, adolf
ps
Im busy getting a pineapple shoved up my rectum in hell now, but we will chat soon i hope!
You are a fucking asshole. You can dislike certain people, but you can't direct your hatred at an entire group of people.
To the person who hates black people, fuck you too.
WIKIPEDIA: In Internet slang, a troll is someone who posts controversial, inflammatory, irrelevant, or off-topic messages in an online community, such as an online discussion forum, chat room or blog, with the primary intent of provoking other users into an emotional response[1] or of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion.
Etymology
The contemporary use of the term is alleged to have first appeared on the internet in the late 1980s,[3] but the earliest known example is from 1991.[4] It is thought to be a truncation of the phrase trolling for suckers, itself derived from the fishing technique of slowly dragging bait through water, known as trolling. The word also evokes the trolls portrayed in Scandinavian folklore and children's tales as they are often creatures bent on mischief and wickedness. The verb "troll" originates from Old French "troller", a hunting term. The noun "troll", however, comes from the Old Norse word for a mythological monster.[5]
No it's not.
Although all religions are global and not restricted to an area, Buddhism is probably more popular in China and Japan than in India.
And most of them don't believe in Gods.
That is like saying Christianity is an Israeli religion just because it started in that part of the world. It's traditions are India based but it has grown beyond national boundaries.
not to nit pick, but Buddhism doesn't have any gods, i believe the religion you were going for is Daoism(also spelled Taoism), religious Daoism(my religion) has the most deities of any currently practiced world religion and is a native Chinese religion.
wow I'm going to guess that no one else who has commented here (except the person posing at Hitler commenting from Hell) has a sense of fucking humor. For crying out loud IT IS NOT A REAL FLOW CHART INTENDED TO HELP YOU MAKE A DECISION, it's a fucking JOKE.
(117 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
October 21st, 2009 at 10:11 am
muslims have their foreskins removed too..
October 22nd, 2009 at 02:19 pm
Muslim's don't eat bacon and humm so better be others
October 22nd, 2009 at 02:45 pm
Gain favor with Satan! = http://bit.ly/2ClqOO
October 22nd, 2009 at 07:37 pm
atheism is not a religion
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:31 pm
Atheism is the belief that there is no god. Belief=religion. Now agnosticism is not a religion but they are quite different...
October 23rd, 2009 at 05:40 am
Oh God, shut up.
October 23rd, 2009 at 11:18 am
Atheist:
So if atheism is the "belief" that there is no God, and belief=religion, then atheism is the "religion" that there is no God.
your logic, not mine.
October 23rd, 2009 at 03:01 pm
"atheist" is wrong. Atheism is NOT a belief of any kind, its the lack of a belief. Therefore, not a religion.
Its not that hard to understand people!
October 23rd, 2009 at 04:13 pm
If atheism is a religion then bald is a hair color.
October 23rd, 2009 at 07:36 pm
Actually "bald" is a hair colour. Think "bald eagle" = white headed eagle. Check out any good dictionary.
And that is a good place to check out "atheism". Any "ism" is the belief or philosophy or system espousing a particular beleif. If one thinks there is no god, and acts on that assumption they are living out their worldview, and probably doing so "religiously" otherwise neither they nor anyone else would know they held those beliefs.
My dictionary says that atheism is a "disbelief in the existence of God, (or gods)" A disbelief is nevertheless a belief. "Belief" the dictionary says is "a firm opinion or conviction, an acceptance, etc.
October 25th, 2009 at 08:04 pm
Atheism is just the lack of belief in a god. Atheist = non-believer.
Sure, you can call a lack of belief a belief, but that just sounds silly.
It is interesting how religious people often want to group atheists into their 'believer' category.
What do we call someone that lacks a belief in Santa?
People, let's just all get along. :) Try to be kind and tolerant of others. It should not matter if your neighbor is a Christian, atheist, Pagan, Pastafarian, Muslim or Jew.
October 26th, 2009 at 01:51 am
Atheism is the firm belief that there is no God. Agnosticism is someone who has no firm belief in anything. Just so we're clear.
October 26th, 2009 at 01:52 am
Agnosticism is just the lack of belief in a god. Agnostic = non-believer.
October 26th, 2009 at 02:44 am
@Macsen:
That is not true. You better read up on your statement:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agnosticism
I cite:
"the view that the question of the existence or nonexistence of a deity or deities and the nature of ultimate reality is unknowable by reason of our natural inability to verify any experience with anything but another subjective experience. A strong agnostic would say, "I cannot know whether a deity exists or not, and neither can you." "
October 26th, 2009 at 11:00 pm
STRONG Belief is biologicaly the same as fact in the recesses of the human mind. Try to convince someone who fervently believes something that their fact is wrong and it doesn't compute in their minds. They must discover a greater truth in their own good time.
October 27th, 2009 at 03:46 pm
I have nothing against Atheists or Theists... but death to the grammar nazis!
October 28th, 2009 at 11:53 am
Grammar Nazis? I only saw definitions be nitpicked in this thread, there was nothing mentioned about grammar. Someone needs to bone up on 8th grade English.
October 29th, 2009 at 08:19 pm
dear kieth, bald is not a hair color, but it is a hair style. in my eyes, we can compare balds to athiests, catholics to wavy hair and jews to the jew fro
October 21st, 2009 at 10:48 am
and Hinduism is monotheistic. They just say god is to complex to put into any one form, so they have "ton's of 'em" but they are all just various manifestations or interpretations of the the various aspects of the one god.
October 21st, 2009 at 11:14 am
Still sounds like polytheism to me. I should know because I played a polytheistic greek dude in 300. 300: Now available on Blue Ray. 300.
October 22nd, 2009 at 06:10 pm
I'm a buddhist and I don't believe in god.
October 23rd, 2009 at 06:35 am
I'm gay. Why would I believe in someone who hates me?
October 26th, 2009 at 08:47 pm
Vishnu:
I think a majority of Hindus understand this but still have "favorite" forms of God so in a sense they do worship many somewhat like Catholics worship many saints knowing their is only one real power in their Heaven.
PS: Some Native Americans say "All gods are one god".
Nic:
The Buddhists I know view the Universe itself as the ultimate power so in a lot of ways that makes them monotheistic.
Bruno:
You're falling into the arrogant trap that the only definition of God is the NeoCon/Fundamentalist/Evangelical Christian definition. That's very narrow minded and limiting of you.
There are many Jews who believe in (essentially) the same God and yet they couldn't give a rat's butt if you are gay. Many Bible/Torah scholars are convinced that King David himself was bisexual.
There are also many more liberal Christians who are happy to fully accept gays (look at some of the Episcopals) and believe if you are gay then God made you that way and that is the way you are supposed to be by design.
Finally, many of the pagan gods and goddesses not only accept gays, some of them ARE gay or bisexual according to their historic mythologies.
The word "God" does not exclusively/automatically mean "Big Mean Dad of Jesus" even a little bit. Open your mind.
November 7th, 2009 at 02:24 pm
To Bruno, who says, "I'm gay. Why would I believe in someone who hates me?": Why have such a narrow view of yourself? You are not merely "gay", you a human being, created in the image of God. He doesn't hate you - he loves you, and Jesus Christ died so that you could be freed from the sins that keep you tied down, and elevated to the status of a child of God and an inheritor of eternal life. If that isn't good news, I don't know what is! Peace and love my good man!
October 21st, 2009 at 11:29 am
do you like to steal from people?
do you like to call yourself the chosen?
do you like to push your shady agenda on other nations?
do you like to rape 13 year old girls and justify it on the suffering of the holocaust?
are you a die hard fan of roman polansky?
do you think bernard madoff is innocent?
you must be a fucking low life jew
October 21st, 2009 at 11:32 am
i agree, most jews are fucking criminals, the worst kind, christians might make war on brown people based on lies but at least they are honest about it, muslims are honest too, if they hate you they say it in front of you
but not fucking jews, they pretend to be your friend and then they stab you in the back
check out the "USS Liberty incident"
israel deliberately bombed an american navy ship
also check out "the lavonn affair"
mother fucking jews
October 21st, 2009 at 11:56 am
sieg heil you sheep fucking racist assholes. eat shit and die you ignorant fucks. the world would be a better place if both of you lip locked the end of a gun and pulled the trigger. do that if you can find enough time out of your busy day of crazy internet conspiracy theories, playing with your own shit, and goose stepping around your parents basement in high heels, a bra and a flashlight shoved up your ass.
love, adolf
ps
Im busy getting a pineapple shoved up my rectum in hell now, but we will chat soon i hope!
October 21st, 2009 at 01:01 pm
I think jews, christians, and people of all religion can agree that negroes are the worst.
October 22nd, 2009 at 06:12 am
Oh, fucks sake...
October 22nd, 2009 at 02:38 pm
YEA f*cks sake- damn it. These people are such a-holes anyway. and they think they're better.
October 22nd, 2009 at 09:27 pm
You are a fucking asshole. You can dislike certain people, but you can't direct your hatred at an entire group of people.
To the person who hates black people, fuck you too.
October 26th, 2009 at 10:09 am
Um, can we get someone to moderate these comments? Because none of this is helpful/healthy.
October 30th, 2009 at 09:35 am
WIKIPEDIA: In Internet slang, a troll is someone who posts controversial, inflammatory, irrelevant, or off-topic messages in an online community, such as an online discussion forum, chat room or blog, with the primary intent of provoking other users into an emotional response[1] or of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion.
Etymology
The contemporary use of the term is alleged to have first appeared on the internet in the late 1980s,[3] but the earliest known example is from 1991.[4] It is thought to be a truncation of the phrase trolling for suckers, itself derived from the fishing technique of slowly dragging bait through water, known as trolling. The word also evokes the trolls portrayed in Scandinavian folklore and children's tales as they are often creatures bent on mischief and wickedness. The verb "troll" originates from Old French "troller", a hunting term. The noun "troll", however, comes from the Old Norse word for a mythological monster.[5]
October 21st, 2009 at 01:23 pm
Buddhists don't really have gods
October 30th, 2009 at 11:30 am
True, Buddhism = nontheistic.
November 5th, 2009 at 01:17 am
Oh? What about Tara, Avalokiteshvara, Kurukulla, etc?
October 21st, 2009 at 04:24 pm
How about the fact that Buddhism is an Indian religion?
October 23rd, 2009 at 01:21 pm
No it's not.
Although all religions are global and not restricted to an area, Buddhism is probably more popular in China and Japan than in India.
And most of them don't believe in Gods.
October 23rd, 2009 at 04:38 pm
It may be more popular in China and Japan, but it started in India and then made it's way to China, then Japan....
October 26th, 2009 at 08:52 pm
That is like saying Christianity is an Israeli religion just because it started in that part of the world. It's traditions are India based but it has grown beyond national boundaries.
October 21st, 2009 at 04:45 pm
not to nit pick, but Buddhism doesn't have any gods, i believe the religion you were going for is Daoism(also spelled Taoism), religious Daoism(my religion) has the most deities of any currently practiced world religion and is a native Chinese religion.
October 21st, 2009 at 05:31 pm
wow I'm going to guess that no one else who has commented here (except the person posing at Hitler commenting from Hell) has a sense of fucking humor. For crying out loud IT IS NOT A REAL FLOW CHART INTENDED TO HELP YOU MAKE A DECISION, it's a fucking JOKE.
By the way, this is hilarious and I thank you.
October 21st, 2009 at 05:40 pm
Thanks, Sugar-tits! it is nice to see other people found this JOKE funny =D
October 22nd, 2009 at 01:17 am
i had to wipe my keyboard after seeing this flowchart....
October 21st, 2009 at 06:26 pm
You should have "Do you love to get smashed every Sunday?" You know, for us Catholics.
October 21st, 2009 at 08:59 pm
Catholics? I thought you slants were like Buddhist or some shit.
October 23rd, 2009 at 01:25 pm
Racist ignorant asshole.
October 21st, 2009 at 08:58 pm
O'Doyle Rules!!!
November 2nd, 2009 at 01:26 am
O'Doyle Rules!
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:30 am
Making the rounds on twitter. This is very funny and good - thanks!
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