Write a caption for this fat guy imposing his gut on someone’s face and you can win a Rambo DVD Box Set on Blue-Ray. This box set includes the knife-wielding First Blood, the gut-ripping Rambo: First Blood Part II and the torso-tearing Rambo III. And you’ll be able to see every last flying limb in pure Blue-Ray crispness. As usual, leave your captions in the comments section. Winners will be notified via email. Happy murdering.
See last week’s winners after the jump:
Winner:
Dude!: “You put your left ear in, you put your left ear out you do the hokie pokie and you slobber all about
Runner Ups:
Ken: help us, we’re white and we cant get down.
Jason C.: Cause this is Thriller, Thriller night.
Matt: Backup dancers for the rock group “System of a Down Syndrome’
Justin: what really happens at LAN parties
Mark: Girl: I just sharted.
Boy: I don’t know what that means.
Girl: I tried to fart and a little shit came out. I just sharted. Now let’s dance.
Balls Jr: The only thing scarier than dancing zombies are the unibrowed aliens in the back.
Christopher: Take’m to the zoo retards love the zoo [Ed. Note: honorable mention just for the Dead Milkmen reference.]
No, seriously dude, I have a giant wang shaped like a female.
Feast upon my bountiful Tummy!!!
See! I told you it smelled like corn chowder! And please don’t ask me how I figured that out…
GUNT!!! The new FUPA.
GET IN MY BELLY!!!!!!
I am an alien face-crab.
a few more beers and this chick wont no the difference between my stomach and my ass.
I don’t have a witty caption. I am just using this space to say that is just fucking disgusting.
“Dig a little deeper I swear my penis is in there somewhere”
The new liposuction! Just 20 minutes a day, three times a week and even you can have washboard abs.
When Jill said she needed some fresh air;this isn’t what she had in mind
“Dig for beijing” (the girls wearing an olympics t-shirt)
45 seconds in, Sally lost her sense of direction and gave Steve the best and only “bellybutton job” he ever had.
After a long day of janitoring (look at all my keys) I need a good lady to suck the high school lint outta ma’ belly!!
And the award for the most belly button lint goes to….
Sure they laughed, but when they came home with the Championship Trophy for Raspberries, they had the final laugh.
Now that’s the way to tongue a belly button. Nom! Nom! Nom!
Crikee!!! Here we see the elusive marsupial Fatfuckaroo releasing one of it’s young from it’s pouch, and she’s a big one.
Look a pearl!
Can you smell last weeks breakfast burito? Because I found some of it this morning.
And now the real trick is to guess the mystery meat I’ve hidden in there…. I thought it was elk at first.
Yummy….camel toe!!!!!
mmm…fumunda cheese, great on crackers
Obama supporters showing their love!
Thats right bitches, I’m hitting this trick.
You should see what she lets me do to her in the sack.
“Hey wow you’re right! It does smell like new car.”
…the new blumkin
Congratulations Mr. DeHut, it’s a girl.
It was at that moment that Susan decided to become a lesbian.
Foreplay……..so easy, even a caveman can do it.
After smothering Kristen with his belly cleavage, Mark decided maybe he SHOULD sign up for “The Biggest Loser.”
MMMMMMM… milk is the juice that comes from cows
Introducing new jamba juice smoothies.
The new party game sensation: “Bobbing for Belly Button Lint”
Jimbo here is why the “Guys Gone Wild” video’s tanked so badly.
Are you slothful by nature? No motivation to do anything? Any incentive handed to you is just not good enough? Well we have the product for you… the lazy man’s tea bag!!
Yes, you can still satisfy the little lady at home. It’s very simple, as shown by the ingredients needed:
40 bean and cheese burritos
35 Double bacon swissburgers
50 Chocolate ice cream sundaes with extra whipped cream
10 cases of Bourbon
1 Functionally retarded friend (test subject)
Get yours today!
I can’t remember – is it an inny or an outy? Oh, and does that body shot need replacing?
Luckily for the stoners, the back-up slurpee machine works just fine!
Lick it, slam it – stomach! Lemons are for wimps.
“You think this is nasty, you should see me have sex!”
after too many drinks, this chick thinks her head in somewhere between a big pair of boobs, little does she know that the fat guy from lost was there to potato bag her
FACIAL!!!!!
When Leonard told Susan to, “Get in my belly!”, this wasn’t quite what he had in mind.
Smell my front butt!
McDonalds; the gift that keeps giving.
In a gool ol’ fashion game of truth or dare, Teresa dares Lesbian Lindy to tongue her butthole. Teresa has her fat douchebag brother bend his man-flob into Lindy’s grill piece. After Lindy tongues bb for 30 seconds, she comments that that was the hairiest chic’s butt she has ever tasted.
Do not do blind dares people!
Times is hard when the Kool-Aid man has to moonlight at bachelorette parties as his alter ego, the Lipton T-Bag… “Oh, Yeah!.
For a limited time only! Giant, raised nutsack on fat guy from Lost!!! Excellent opportunity for t-bag specials!
I won the BET!!! Either this or kiss him.
No, I can’t see heaven!
She queried, “What does t-bag mean?”. He has trouble finding the bag.
“World’s Most Unfortunate Conjoined Twins friends’ think its Hilarious”
You motor boatin’ son of a bitch!
“Hurley! Stop crushing Claire!”
See the amazing front-butted man poop out full grown earthlings.
So this is patato-sacked?
“I have a midget in my shirt. Now toss his salad, wench!”
Tired of cooking, slicing or even chewing his food, Dave decided he’d just cut out the middleman altogether.
(win, lose or invalid entry, some things just demand to be commented on. And then mentally suppressed *shudder*)
Dude, I think I just got some.
Seriously, who wears an ORANGE ring!? Crazy…
“I hate wasting time when I eat people. Fuck using my mouth.” laughed the mystical bearded belly eater as he appeared from under the couch.
It’s a close race, but your camel toe is bigger.
I nurtures mah yungins’ with mah belly milk.
Thanks for holding on to my gum.
GUT-BAGGING (noun): a derivative of tea-bagging, but without the inevitable pubic floss left behind.
Of COURSE silent bob’s umbilical cord wears a green special olympics shirt.
Where’s the F-ing money! Don’t make me turn around and do this the hard way!
Next week on LOST.
Cindy, why does your toe smell like belly-button?
Bob the assassin had let himself go since ninja school, but he still had one trick left!
“Hey Tammy, you’re right. It really does smell like a giant ball sack!”
My face is a blubbery adolescent. Your argument is invalid.
“It’s just like childbirth”
I second MR Balls Comment:
“I don’t have a witty caption. I am just using this space to say that is just fucking disgusting.”
Deep down inside, it hurt Stanley that his flatmates used his handicap (he was born with his ass on the wrong side) as a means of laughs and punishments during drinking games., but in time he came to the realization that it was the closest thing to a blowjob that he would ever receive.
Only those wearing green are entitled to the good luck that comes from eating the asshole of the leprechaun Andy hides inside his shirt….
“Check out my Hurley’s Summers Eve brand douches… See how it keeps my mangina totally clean?”
“It was that night long ago that I stopped fearing hell”
OM NOM NOM NOM!!!
Bellybutton?! I thought this was a rimjob!
” free body shots!.. any takers? “
Trust me, this is how the celebreties get their face lifts.
Fuck Tea-baggin…. I’m gonna Sand-bag this chick…
My Milkshake brings all the girls to the yard…Damn right its Better than Yours.
In the name of the Lord I cast you back to hell demon! Hallelujah, praise Jesus.
So thats how claire gets killed off in Lost…
“The new bionic situp”
“Amazing new skin treatment that promises to have wrinkles no more found by fluke on the dorm rooms of MIT’s sorority students”
Stomach Fellatio
I tried to explain water-boarding to her, but I didn’t have any water, so I improvised…
I think she got the idea.
See, I told you my balls were big and smelt of cheese!
Stomach boobs, they are not just for breakfast anymore!
See I told you could motorboat my gut rubber, I feel like such a piece of meat!
Jesus is back and in 2008 he’s turning women into lesbians, no more of this water into wine crap.
After a long cold winter, the midwestern nerd elk comes out of hibernation to nourish and protect the young females of the herd.
2 for 1 sale this week only! Home liposuction and collegen lip enhancement.
Mom always said “Never put anything smaller than a women’s head into your belly button.”
“You’re right!” Sara exclaimed. “This is just like when I used to sit on Grandma’s lap!”
The tea-bagging stunt turned tragic when Julie’s nose ring became entwined with Mark’s belly button ring.
Human Bagpipes.
Fatty: So… you got any idea what’s making that smell yet?
and or
Fatty: I brought you a shot of whisky in my belly button. Let me squeeze it out for ya.
When Kelly Ripa met James Fupa.
This is the picture that sent this poor girl to rehab.
Her grandma cried and said, “Couldn’t you have just whored yourself out for drugs like your mother an I, this is just embarrassing. You’re out of the will!”
4 8 15 16 23 42, Hurley wants to know how long can YOU hold your breath
Franky: Hey Jen, remember that time you said you wanted to see a close-up of your vagina?
Jen: Yes?
Franky: I had the greatest idea!#%R@ check this shit out.
Jen: *garbled words*
The smegma in Zane’s bellybutton: the only culture America has left.
It wants me to go towards the light!
Dude, you never go front-ass to mouth…
“Yeeeah, my ass is at the front. I’m not sure why, but it makes taking a shit so much more difficult.”
WHOULD YOU LIKE ME TO BIGGIE SIZE YOUR TEABAG?
What dude she asked what it would be like to go down on Rosie Odonnell!
They never expected… THE AVALANCHE!
OHHHH YEAAAAA !!! TOSS MY BELLY SALAD!!!
She wanted to know how it was like eating out a woman. He showed her how would be eating out a man.
Man (20) strangled his girlfriend (19) tuesday night after she complained about having gained a few pounds.
ups. She wanted to know how it was like eating out a woman. He showed her how IT would be eating out a man.
He gives her a ‘other side’ of Ass-Munching…
Gut-Munching.
Larry: I HAVE A FRONT BUM AS WELL! SUCK IT BITCH
haha
Girl: Eh, it was an odd request but 20 bucks is 20 bucks!
Jabba tacos, best served open faced.
Poor Sharon always lost in “Musical Stomach-Butt”.
Nom nom nom
Girl: argh! its eating my face!
Fat Guy: it knows your afraid…
My belly-button is my butt-hole.
….Skittles!
hurry! get in the tauntaun!
come out kuato, wherever you are!!
“Lost” season 8 Cast is shrunk down and tossed into normal sized Hurley’s fat rolls and randomly pop out. “Last time on Lost Kate popped out who will be next?”
look ma! no hands.
You’re right! It does taste like bacon!
Sorry Mr. Brown doesn’t leave here, he’s actually around the corner
DURRRRR! live
I hid a milkshake in there. It brings all the girls to the yard.
i knew chicks would dig me if i got an ass surgically stuck to my stomach!
See I told you there was chicken wing in there!
Butter Face
Oooh ya. That’s right bitch. Lick my stom-ass-hole. mmmmm
Lost
Countless reasons to turn a woman into a lesbian…
The sad story of Jim and his siamese twin sister Lisa.
No Hurley, you use your BALLS for Arabian Goggles
This isn’t a caption.
Notice how the fatass is using a belt on his pants, but yet his pants are still sagging.
Do they really make pants that big?
Guess Who: Obesity Edition
Its a trap!
OM NOM NOM NOM
The McCain twins relax with friends the evening before their long-awaited seperation.
the human cow
If men could give birth.
She’s gone from suck to blow.
Steven’s coke party turned out to be very uncomfortable.
Why have a six-pack when you could be a walking keg stand?
The messiah heals his sheep!
You motor-boating little slut!
‘Gutupffff, ovpth mpthym phfaghoff!’
In a Richard Attenborough voice over: “And so we see the tummy assassin killing off another victim…”
“…and then, the blow job went horribly, horribly wrong.”
That was when teabagging was changed forever.
You no longer have to go around the corner for fudge.
Next week, on Lost….
This is why ABC cancelled Cavemen……..
“Hitman 2: Silent Assassin”
Happy Trails!
Nature Show Narrator: Be quiet as we watch the calf suckle from the mother’s teats.
She heard a news blurb: “Can the sweat from under a fat man’s belly prevent acne? Find out on Fox 10 o’clock news”
I told you I’d get my dick to touch the back of her skull. Pay up bitches.
You know, this doesn’t smell half as bad as I imagined it would.
mmmm….smells like teen spirit
Katherine makes a daring attempt to prove her parents wrong once and for all: she wasn’t close to hitting rock bottom when she became a stripper.
Girl: Yeah, that’s definitely a man-gina…
Guy: “(sexual groans)”
Fat Guy with a magnetic belly button ring — check
Daredevil Chick with a metal tongue ring — check
Camera — check
Now how do we get them back apart?
What would you do for a klondike bar?
“Is she all the way out yet?”
Spy Photos: First look at man with girl shaped penis!
(muffled voice) Hey! I found some Cheetos in here!
Isnt that the fat fuck from Lost?, who’s been lost for like 3 months and doesnt seem to lose weight…..now she’s gonna be LOST.
Girl: I am sure this is not the way you give a blowjob
“Oh my God… it’s full of stars…”
I said what what in the gut. You wanna do it in my gut? In my gut? Let’s do it in the gut, Ok.
Okay, you win! I’ll stop singing.
Belly: “…nawm nawm nawm!”
“Is this getting laid?”
“…and that’s the second time I got crabs.”
Little did she know that he had a birth defect that placed his ass in the front
Once Stacy found the hidden deposit of caramel, there was no getting her out. Diabetes be damned.
She’s thinking: “Geez, this bread tastes a little doughy.”
“Faced” the new head… men love it, women hate it.
If it looks like ass, smells like ass, it’s not necessarily an ass!
Even If it looks like ass, smells like ass, it’s not necessarily an ass!
Even If it looks like an ass, smells like an ass, it’s not necessarily an ass!
So this is where he hides his chicken…
they told me it worked this way!!!
I knew you’d like my mangina, it was only a matter of time.
oh. I’m sorry it slips out like that sometimes
im flubbergasted!
Worst game of Truth or Dare ever!
Great Moments in Hook-up History:
Not since the “Penis in the Popcorn” maneuver have we seen creativity like this. What seemed like a simple sandbag turned into something greater when she found his junk in there.
Suck my ass!
“I know she totally thought I was him! And I said I’d get her an audition if she used tongue”
good lord, it’s feeding!!!
The new age of Teabagging.
Get in mah belly!
She’s obviously curious to know how pube sweat, crusted semen, and cool ranch doritos taste all together.
the saddest part of all, is that i had a hard time getting laid in college, but this fat son of a bitch somehow talked her into doing that. where the “f” were chicks like this when i was in school?
BRRRRRRIITSKEEEE!!!
Jane always wanted to give a motorboat………..
Alien’s meet the blob!!!
Bubba: Hey Suzy look up.
Suzy: What the aaaarrrrgggurgle As She is got sucked into the bubbbabys.
Keep laughing, bitch. Your next.
You’re right. You could fuck yourself in here! OMG, is there something in my hair?
Ed: where is my prize from the other week?
Tomorrow on Foxnews “Cyber Love Connections” .See how fat slobs meet bellybutton lint loving whores and how true love is just a click away.
he just stink faced her rakishi style with his front butt.
The best things in life ARE free.
And to think… On Hoth, they’d have to use a ton-ton
“What? A blind girl asked for a warm towelette, but i couldn’t find one. What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”
“Oh shit…I just jizzed my pants.”
Where’d that hot chick go. I think she wanted me.
“And here is a representation of what it is like to 69 a fat chick!”
DAMNIT… cyanide gas leaking through air ducts… must have been the commie spies! Here, save yourself! I have a respirator under here with enough air for two weeks! When I’m gone, tell my mother I love her!
… oh, and can you stick your tongue out a bit? It’s the most action I’ve had in years…
apparently he does suffer from dickie do
Virginity…Guess who just lost their’s
first rule of fat club……YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT FAT CLUB!!!.
Just like momma does it!! Oh wait.. shit.. did i just say that out loud…?!?
Keep rollin’ rollin’ rollin’!
3 girls 1 gut
Dude!! Crack Kills!!
I’m Not sure…but I dont think this is the right way to teabag someone.
The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach – duh.
“Where’s the beef?”
It was funny…until she died.
The poor girl is having a seizure quick someone put some thing in her mouth so she doesn’t bite her tongue off.
When Jenny and I were dating she thought the little head growing from my stomach fat was disgusting but now that her and bob are dating I feel like a thrid wheel on a positive note bob and i share everything but our heads *wink wink*
Take a good look Bowflex said this will be gone in six to eight weeks with only twenty minutes a day.
What she doesn’t know is this man has a conjoined twin on his abdomen facing him.
Just a little further….”Holy fuck! Something in here has eyes! It’s winking at me!!”
Subway’s Jared, after the weightloss and before the rehab and sponsorship cash
In his belly you will find a new definition of pain and suffering as you are slowly digested over athousand years.
get into my belly
once u go fat you never go back. or once you go fatback u never grow that? what what? this isn’t where i parked my car
tea baggin; don’t let swallowing your own balls stop you from getting some…
Jim Morrison is ALIVE!!
Yeah, it is kinda like rimming
Looks like butt crack, smells like butt crack, tastes like butt crack, good thing I didn’t step in it