Planking. Owling. Whateverthef*cking. They’re all a part of the newest heights people have reached in order to prove that they are, in fact, morons that are desperately searching for some shred of acceptance by way of the internet by partaking in the idiotic prank/stunt trends.
There is another one out there called Coning, which involves ordering an ice cream cone from the McDonalds drive-through and then grabbing it by the swirl of ice cream instead of the cone when the McDonalds employee hands to you. The argument against people that think doing these kinds of things are stupid (such as ourselves) usually goes something like this: “Stoop bein such a stuckup byiotch and have funnnnn!” You can find such arguments on damn near every Coning video on Youtube, and clearly they are very hard to argue against, because it’s hard to argue against something you can barely understand when you read it. But let’s just clear the air once and for all by saying this:
If you are in to Coning — either a fan of the videos or are someone that films themselves Coning — you are one of the most boring people on the planet. If your idea of fun and excitement is grabbing a dessert by the wrong end, and then posting the video of it on Youtube, f*cking kill yourself. You have nothing to offer the world. You are polluting the earth with the noxious and highly flammable fumes given off by your own stupidity and vapid personality. If you find such an activity entertaining, then you may very well be the kind of person that much later in life – maybe around age 50 — discovers that they’ve slogged their way in to a middle management position at Walgreens, and they’ve climbed this seemingly insurmountable mountain of achievement while possessing an I.Q. lower than that of a plant and an attention span that’s only sparked by jingling keys and dogs humping. What you’re doing isn’t “fun”. It’s called being an uninteresting asshole.
But that’s enough from me. Ranting about this crap on a blog means nothing. What really matters is confronting these uninteresting asshole face-to-face, like this McDonald’s employee did to a couple of mongoloids that attempted to do their Coning thing, because something only gets funnier when it’s done for the 1,000th time.
McDonald’s Employee That Didn’t Stand For That Shit, we and all other people that breath through our noses thank you – thank you for quickly identifying stupidity, and thank you for calling them out on it before the ritual of stupidity commenced.