Hillary And Obama Learn How To Share?

I love how politicians, when trying to site trends and statistics that point to why they should be elected, say things like “No one in recent history who didn’t win their party’s primary in Ohio EVER went on to win the presidency.” Maybe, but who gives a fuck? I wish she had just said “No one who didn’t eat pancakes in San Diego on at least one Tuesday in February of an election year, has EVER won the presidency. I was at an IHOP there last tuesday eating a short stack, I didn’t see Senator Obama.” Anyway, since I heard these two might run on the same ticket, I went ahead and made a bumper sticker for them and gave it out to random people. Here’s one:

This election is really close, but I noticed that there’s another election that’s also really close. This week’s “Who Would You Rather Do?” People are so split down the middle between Jameson and Bush. I feel like as a responsible “journalist” I should have sex with both of them and then report back to you.