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Holy Taco Gift Guide Is Here!

December 18th, 2008 | 04:50 pm
Don't know what to get your family for the Holidays?  Well, that's why we're here, to create a bunch of really shitty products and set up our own cafepress store where you can purchase them.  So, please, purchase away!  All proceeds go to the Eagles covering this weekend.
 
FRIDAY NIGHT WALL CLOCK
 
 
We all want to know if it's time for doggy style sex.  You shouldn't leave that to chance.
 
 
SMUGGLES THE TEDDY BEAR
 
Text Reads: "You Can Cuddle Me! Or fill me with cocaine and smuggle me through customs.  Your choice.
 
 
Osama Bin Laden's Senior Photo T- Shirt
 
We all remember our awkward Senior Photos, so let's help Osama remember his!
 
 
 
"Let's Nuke Some Dogs" George Bush BBQ Apron
 
 
What better way to enjoy a barbecue then to make a joke about a possible nuclear war!
 
 
Obama Likes Nachos Campaign Poster (23X35)
 
How could a man who endorses nachos NOT get elected?
 
$21.99 Purchase Here         (11X17) $7,99 Purchase Here
 
Barack Obama "Ya'll Betta Rekognize" Campaign Poster (23X35)
Hopefully by now, everyone has rekognized.  But in case they haven't, this poster might help.
 
$21.99 Purchase Here       (11X17) $7.99 Purchase Here
 
Cheetah 25,000 Dollar Pyrmaid Mouse Pad
Why wouldn't you want your mouse pad to have two cheetahs playing 25k pyramid?  I ask myself that daily.
 
 
Letting People Know Coffee Makes You Shit - Coffee Mug
Text Reads: "If I'm Holding This, I'm Probably Going To Shit Soon"
 
Now when you abruptly end a conversation, people won't be mystified as to why.
 
 
I Don't Care Coffee Mug
 
Text Reads: "I don't care enough to get you a thoughtful gift, but I figure you probably drink things from time to time."
 
Who doesn't drink things from time to time?
 
 
Dog's Inner-Monologue T-Shirt
Text Reads: "Thanks for deciding to dress me in human clothes, yet still leaving my penis exposed"
 
Is he being sarcastic?  Does he mean it?  Either way, aaaaadorable!
 
 
Holy Taco Company Softball Shirt
We can't afford a company softball team, but if we had one, we'd probably wear this shirt.  Probably.
 
 
The Last Supper Halloween Greeting Card
Jesus knows how to throw a costume party, that is for certain.  Now you can send your friends greetings thanks to his partying!
 
Single Card $3.99  Purchase Here          Pack of 10 Cards $19.99 Purchase Here
 
Rambo Holiday Card
What better way to say Merry Christmas than with a note from Rambo about an offensive break he's taking.
 
Single Card $3.99 Purchase Here       Pack of 10 Cards $19.99 Purchase Here
 
The Predator Family Holiday Card
 
Every year I wish for the Predator and his family to send me a holiday card, and it never happens.  Let's not let that happen to the people you care about.
 
Single Card $3.99 Purchase Here      Pack of 10 $19.99 Purchase Here
 
Mom Says I'm A Good Kisser T-shirt
 
You should be proud that your parents are also proud of you.
 
 
The So Hipster It Makes Fun Of How Hipster It Is Trucker Hat
 
It's an ironic hat, that's even double ironic because they're not in style anymore.  Yet you're wearing it.  Yet it says that you think it's lame!  The levels of irony!
 
 
Johnny Wickham Has No Penis Coaster
You don't know Johnny, but we do.  And he's going to be awfully surprised that he's on this gift list.  But what he won't be surprised about, is the fact that he has a small penis.  Everyone knows that.  Merry Christmas Johnny.
 
 
holy taco, gift guide, crap
Comments

14 Responses to "Holy Taco Gift Guide Is Here!"

  1. Anonymous Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 05:13 pm

    are these real, or just a bs article? Too many good christmas presents here! You ship overseas?

  2. justin Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 05:19 pm

    These are most certainly real.  We're that broke.  I'm pretty sure cafe press ships over seas.

  3. Roger Lodge Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 06:05 pm

    I'll be purchasing that wall clock so I know what time to do coke.

  4. Pete rock Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 06:14 pm

    Yo, yo, yo

    Looks good

  5. Anonymous Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 06:27 pm

    Great job

  6. Jim Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 06:37 pm

    Awesome, looks great!

  7. Anonymous Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 07:02 pm

    Johnny Wicknam does have a small penis

  8. PYT Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 08:06 pm

    Where do I get that clock?

  9. spanky Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 09:10 pm

    So what are you saying; that trucker hats aren't cool?

  10. DROP DEAD JACK Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 09:03 pm

    holy shit those are some expensive posters. those bitches better come framed.

  11. Johnny Wicknam Says:
    December 19th, 2008 at 07:04 am

    If I stay with midgets its actually quite big...

  12. LOKi Says:
    December 19th, 2008 at 07:19 am

    Well apparently midgets genitalia are normal size. It's God's way of saying sorry. Or just another bitch slap for you Johnny!

  13. Pratik Says:
    December 19th, 2008 at 08:51 am

    Can you guys get a car's gasoline tank and put the same inscription on it, except it says "illegal immigrants" instead of "cocaine"?

    I would buy that for $50.

  14. Pratik Says:
    December 19th, 2008 at 08:56 am

    Can you guys get a car's gasoline tank and put the same inscription on it as the teddy bear, except it says "illegal immigrants" instead of "cocaine"?

    I would buy that for $50.

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