Holy Taco Is Going Under The Knife

Dear Readers,

We’re going to be doing a little site maintenance today (which is in preparation for a larger site overhaul in a few weeks. Spoiler alert!), so we won’t be updating for the next few hours. Your comments will show up, but might be slightly delayed, so feel free to use the site as you normally would (just promise you’ll call us in the morning. We hate feeling used.)

So, while you’re sitting there waiting for us to put up more pictures of bikini clad girls and photoshops of Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, take a trip down mammary lane with us. Here are a few posts that, much like retarded children, will always have a special place on our hearts.

Politicians Have Filthy, Filthy Names
Whoever wants to get a Perry or a Gregoire, just needs to shoot us an email.

John Tesh Rocks Out
Watching John Tesh rock the shit out of the NBA on NBC theme while a fiddler battles a guitarist, well, it doesn’t get any better. I watch this several times a month, not joking.

Hurricane Ike is going to slap the shit out of Texas
In this one, Ike is telling Texas that he is going to slap the shit out of it.

If Classic Works of Art Were Made Today
I would pay a LOT of money to have the Carrot Top portrait framed and put on my wall. A LOT.

No one shops harder than James Hetfield
This photo ruined the song “One” forever.

If Garfield was in Glengarry Glen Ross
Garfield hates Mondays. But he loves closers.

If God’s were drafted like fantasy football
I like this one mostly because it took forever to make.

Exhausted athletes give great interviews
This…video…always…makes me…sigh…uhh…hang on….

Monkeys Racing Bears On Bicycles
There are monkeys. And they are racing bears. On bicycles. This explodes my mind every time I watch it.

Celebrities with black eyes
See, they’re just like us!

A squirrel eating a Ritz cracker to Huey Lewis’s “If This Is It”
I would even watch a squirrel eat a Ritz cracker to an REO Speedwagon song. Seriously.

8 Memos from God’s Desk
I particularly like this one because I always thought it was creepy that God might be watching me while I masturbate.