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Holy Taco’s Top 10 Most Popular Articles of 2011

Another year has come to an end and as we look back, we can all say Holy Taco provided a solid year of awesome.  In fact, it was super awesome.  We were nominated for awards, we made tender love to many sexy ladies and we got gassy after many exquisite meals.  It was delightful.  But what was the best of everything?  It’s hard to pick the most valuable diamond, the most tasty beer, the most stupid Kardashian, but lucky for us we have Google Analytics that tells us what was the best of the year without us even having to stress our brains (later in the day we’ll stress our brains and pick favorite articles, but for now, these are your favorites as dictated by how many people read them).

#10 – Learn to Write with Terrell Mims: Plagiarist


Our tenth most read article ironically called out someone who stole other popular articles, Mr. Terrell “I Can’t Think for Myself so Please Think For Me” Mims.  Bless his heart, the little plagiarist was staking out a whole corner of the internet with purloined works and calling them his own.  Rather than address the allegations against him, he simply disappeared when confronted with his many shameless crimes.  What a tool!  Ahh, but he was fun for an afternoon.

#9 – Flowchart to Determine Which Team you Should Root for in Superbowl XLV


Do you know why flowcharts are popular?  It’s highly concentrated funny on a single topic in an easy to enjoy format.  Make it about the Superbowl, which we understand is one of the top 15 Bowls held in a given year and that’s a winner.

#8 – Would You Rather Bang The T-Mobile Girl Or Punch Her White-Rapper Friend In His Smug Face


This article scored high points because it’s a thinker.  Like choosing whether you’d rather lose your sight or your hearing, this conundrum presents you with two very compelling choices – bone the hot girl or eliminate her asshole sidekick.  If you can only do one, you’ll be very hard pressed to make a decision.  Choose, but choose wisely.

#7 – Dawson Reacts To Photos of Snooki: A Van Der Memes Experiment


James van der Beek and Snooki?  Plus GIFs?  Yes, this article pretty much made itself, we just hosted it.

#6 – A Breakdown of the Ingredients in Taco Bell’s Taco Beef


This article went over really well on Facebook, where we assume Taco Bell recruits many of its customers late at night while they play Farmtown or Junkyville or whatever.  Written in response to that rumor from a few months back that Taco Bell’s meat is made from hobos or tree pulp or whatever, our intrepid editor Luis Prada delved deep into the heart of each and every ingredient to tell you why Taco Bell is still delicious.

#5 – Would You Bang A Miley Cyrus Sex Doll? Because Now You Can!


Miley Cyrus is a perennial favorite on the internet and sex dolls top everyone’s Google searches, so it makes sense that when someone decided to make a Miley Cyrus sex doll in honor of being a disgusting human, our article on it would be a popular one.  Because we’re journalists, dammit.

#4 – Christopher Columbus Was Kind of a Douchebag


Columbus Day is the most popular day on the internet according to the sentence I’m currently typing.  It’s no wonder then that, when we forced a meme in honor of said day, it took off like gangbusters!

#3 – Hot Female Murderers That You’d Probably Go Home With


Remember Casey Anthony?  Yeah, she got acquitted of murder and is still in hiding as far as we know due to the fact no one except her jury thinks she didn’t do it.  About 60 of the news coverage about her had to do with the actual murder case, the rest was devoted to the fact that she was hot.  Future murderers take note.  Anyway, Jim Tews decided to remind you that Casey Anthony wasn’t the only hot murderer in history – it was educational!

#2 – 7 Examples of Misguided Superhero Casting


You know why this article was so popular?  Entry #2.  Man, so many people got pissy that we made fun of Superman.  If we were smarter writers we’d do stuff like that just to stir up shit on purpose.  Good thing we’re not!

#1 – 7 Avengers Too Lame for the Movies


Our most popular article of the past year with hundreds of thousands of reads and nearly 40 +1’s on Google Plus which is like a dozen more than anything else we’ve ever done, this article on lame ass Avengers clearly struck a chord with an internet crowd who has as big a nerd boner for this movie as we do.  Plus the jokes at the expense of Ulysses Bloodstone were pretty inspired.

So now you know what was the most popular by the numbers, what did you love that we missed?  Tell us.  Validate us!!

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