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How Celebrities Spend Their Tax Returns

Famous people are just like you: they have personal assistants to do everything for them, they can adopt African orphans even if they’re single, workaholic drug addicts, and they have to file their taxes today. Unlike you, some celebs are expecting to get hefty tax returns this year, and here’s what they’re planning to do with the extra cash:
Justin Bieber – Pubic Hair
Oprah Winfrey – Moon-Etched Portrait
Conan O’Brien – A Time Machine

Ben Roethlisberger – Another Rape Alibi
Tom Cruise – The Last Piece of His Spaceship, "The L-Ron 5000"
Hugh Hefner – The Fountain of Youth
Steven Seagal – A Year’s Supply of Sex Slaves
Nicolas Cage – Lunch

9 Responses to "How Celebrities Spend Their Tax Returns"

  1. kayla says:

    OMG…they need 2 STOPP hatin on j.b ,he aint do nothin wrong nd if he did then o well….GET OVA IT!!!!

    <33333333 justin.drew.bieber

  2. GoFuckYourself says:

    Wow beibs, that’s really honest of you. Now if you can just come to terms with being a Canadian. I’m sure you will. Can’t wait to see you on a Dr. Drew reality show talking about your addiction to shoving rodents up your ass.

  3. Justin Bieber says:

    Actually Kayla, these guys are right. I’m pretty much the epitome of a faggot. I really just need a penis to spray hot jizz down my throat.

  4. ldfdl;sjf;dklsjf says:

    A tax RETURN is a piece of paper that you file with the IRS.

    A tax REFUND is the money you get back if they withheld too much.

  5. Skudoosh says:

    A douche BAG is what ldfdl;sjf;dklsjf is.

  6. your moms mexican fantasy says:

    first bitchest

  7. GG Allin says:

    if you type in umop apisdn then turn your computer upside down, it says upside down.

  8. pratik says:

    Is R. Kelly gonna adopt a 14 year old Canadian girl?

  9. DonkeyXote says:

    Nic Cage in leather!