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How White Trash Is Your City?

Do you know how white trash your city is? To make it easy, we worked up a formula to see where your crappy, redneck-filled town stands in relation to other crappy, redneck-filled towns across the US. Just plug the appropriate numbers into this fomula:
0-300: Not white trash. We’re sure you have tons of other undesirables in your city, but they’re most likely not white trash.
301-600:  A little white trash.  There’s probably pockets of your city that have tons of white trash, but most of the city probably doesn’t have much.
601-800: Your city is pretty white trashy.  Not only are there pockets of white trash, but there’s a fair amount of white trash in every sector.  Most likely you can’t go very far without hearing the cry of an illegitimate child or seeing a car parked on a lawn.
801-999: Your city is in the white trash elites. You look down on other cities that have "parks" and "libraries."
1000+: Jerry Springer White Trash. Your city is crawling with white trash. The majority of shirts are sleeveless or mesh.  You most likely know someone who’s had the fact that they fathered a child revealed to them on a talk show.  Most times when you sit down to eat, the dish can be described by saying the name of the meat, and adding the word "casserole" to the end of it.
We’ll walk you through the step-by-step process for you. For this example, we’re doing beautiful Phoenix, Arizona.

Step 1: Find a zip code of your city by simply googling your cities name + zip code. For Phoenix, the zip code used is 85001.
Step 2: Go to marshallsonline.com/locator.asp.  Type in your city’s zip code, in this case 85001.  Count all the Marshall’s that are within your city’s limits.  Not county, just metropolitan city.  Use your judgement as to what is or is not within your city limits.  Luckily for us, our own Justin Thomas is from Phoenix.  If you’re doing a city you don’t know well, use a 20 mile radius.  Count up the number of Marshall’s. Phoenix has 12.
Step 3: Go to olivegarden.com/locator to find the Olive Gardens in your city.  Repeat the same process as step 2.  Phoenix has 15.
Step 4: Go to walmart.com and find the store locater.  Repeat the same process as step 3.  Phoenix has 20 wal-marts.
Step 5: Go To devry.edu and repeat the same process as step 4.  Phoenix has
three Devry Institutes.
Step 6: Go to google.com, then at the top left, click "maps."  Then type in the search "Trailer parks" + Zip code. Then above your search results, there will be a link titled "Mobile Home Parks & Communities," click on that to refine your search so that it’s only pulling up trailer parks.  Scroll down to the bottom, and above the "NEXT" to see more pages, you’ll see a number of results. Write that down.  Phoenix has 303.
Here’s a couple screengrab to illustrate what you should be looking for in your Trailer Park Google search:
The Number of Results:

Step 7: Move the decimal point of the population left 6 places and divide by that. (For example a population of 3,500,000 would become 3.5).
Now, enter in all the results into the formula. Here’s what Phoenix looks like:
With its endless sprawl and lack of any real culture, Phoenix scores pretty high in the White Trash Formula. It’s three Devry’s and 15 Olive Gardens (15!) really cements its place among white trash communities in America.
Here are a few other examples around the United States.
Despite what you might think, Denver actually scores quite low on the white trash scale. It recovered from a high number of Wal-Marts with a low number of Olive Gardens.
We put NYC’s numbers in to see if our formula really worked. With no Wal-Marts and no trailer parks, New York lives up to its reputation of city full of East Coast elites.
No city can recover from double digit numbers of Olive Gardens and Wal-Marts. You throw in two Devry Institutes, which count a whopping 50 points each and you have one of the whitiest, trashiest cities in America.
San Diego feels like it should score much higher in the white trash formula, but it’s deceptively high 1.3 million population keeps it in the mid-level range.
 Detroit, while very poor, is much more of a ghetto town than a white trash town. Which is an entirely different formula that we’re probably not going to do anytime soon.
Since we knoew that the midwest was prime real estate for red neck white trash, we asked Screen Junkies editor, and Missourian, Patrick Schumacker where the epicenter of The Show-Me State’s red necks could be found. He said, "Cape Girardeau. No question." Looks like he was right.
So, figure out where your city scores and post the results in the comment section. Those with the highest numbers will win a HolyTaco T-Shirt.
And Please Give This A Digg For Us. Your Diggs Help Keep HolyTaco On The Internets.

105 Responses to "How White Trash Is Your City?"

  1. Anonymous says:

    Canton, OH (44701):

    Olive Gardens: 1 = 10
    Walmarts: 5 = 50
    Marshalls: 1 = 10
    Trailer Parks: 163 = 163
    Devry Tech: 0 = 0
    Total: 233
    Population: 78,319 —–
    Divide by: .078

    FINAL COUNT = 2987!!!!

  2. Anonymous says:

    Cleveland- 338

  3. milos says:

    Boise Idaho gets 665
    I thought it would be a lot higher considering the sheer number of mullets here.
    There are well over 665 mullets within the city limits!!

  4. Becca says:

    I completely agree. I’m originally from Mt Pleasant (Westmoreland County) and now live in a little town in Western NC, and believe me, it is way more WT here than Pittsburgh

  5. Anonymous says:

    No you got it wrong. Biggest little hick town in *CALIFORNIA.

  6. d0gma says:

    The first guy who used Houston can’t do math.
    I used 77053 for Houston and I got 1248.

    10 Olive Gardens
    4 Marshalls
    20 Wal Marts
    2 Devry
    1343 Trailer parks.
    2.15 million population.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Cincinnati, OH

    Using metro areas (including Northern Kentucky:

    4 Olive Gardens
    15 Walmarts
    0 Marshall’s
    116 Trailer Parks
    1 DeVry Institute

    356/2 (metro pop of about 2 mil) = Very not white trash.

    Using just city:

    2 Olive Gardens
    8 Walmarts
    0 Marshall’s
    116 Trailer Parks
    1 Devry Institute

    266/.332 = 801

    Right on the border between very white trash and some white trash.

  8. Anonymous says:

    Sacramento is a little hick town? WTF? The capitol of the left coast is a hick town?

  9. Whodat says:

    Poughkeepsie, NY = 32

    We’re not white trash, just ghetto

    can’t stop laughing at these comments of how Olive Garden is considered upscale dining, also, I lived in Denver for a few years and I would definately rank it higher on the white trash scale just by experience

  10. Anonymous says:

    Fayetteville, NC – 470. I thought it would be worse.

  11. Yarsh says:

    Every one of your examples uses the city limits population with the exception of Denver, CO – in which you are using the metro population.

    Plug in the actual city limits population of approx 562,000, and your actual White Trash total goes from 201 to 893.

    Sorry, I didn’t actually believe that Denver was less White Trash than Phoenix…

  12. Anonymous says:


  13. justin says:
    Damn. Thanks. That’s why we’re writers, and not mathers.
  14. Cooter says:

    San Franfreako, CA
    1 Marshalls = 10
    1 Olive Gardens = 10
    0 Walmarts = 0
    0 Trailer parks =0
    1 Devry = 50
    TOTAL: 70

    Population 799,000

    Score: 56

    I’m glad to see we are not white trash. However, maybe you should do another version of this called “How Gay is Your City.” That would put the ASS in embarrassing.

  15. Trogdor says:

    If you’re counting Walmarts within 25 miles, you should probably count population in the same radius. Let’s just use the population of Allegheny county, and to be consistent, Walmarts in Allegheny county (8). So,

    Olive Garden: 4 x 10 = 40
    Walmarts (Allegheny County): 8 x 10 = 80
    Marshall’s: 5 x 10 = 50
    Trailer Parks: 103×1 = 103
    Devry: 1×50 = 50
    population (1,200,000)

    = 323/1.2 = 269

    I’ve lived in or near Pittsburgh most of my life, and I’m not saying that there isn’t a loud and proud WT population. What I am saying is that if Pittsburgh is 1264, there aren’t numbers big enough to cover the inland South. Or Florida. Just sayin’.

  16. MTC says:

    Decatur, GA

    Olive Garden 0
    Walmart 1
    Marshall’s 0
    Trailer Parks 0
    Devry 1
    Total Points: 60
    Population: 19,000/1,000,000 = .019

    60/.019 = 3157 WINNER!!!

    The funniest thing about this result is that if you ask people in Atlanta, Decatur is the lesbian/yuppie town. No one would guess that is secretly redneck heaven.

    Also, your math is wrong on Detroit. 371/.917 = 404

  17. Stephanie says:

    So, according to your formula, Austin, Texas is a little white trash. I have to agree. I think we have a little white trash in all of us.

    When I entered the zip code, 78745, there were:

    3 Olive Gardens
    7 Walmarts
    4 Marshalls
    148 trailer parks
    1 Devry
    Austin had a population of 743,074 at the time of the 2007 census. When divided by one million, we get .74.

    That gives Austin a total of 457. In defense of Marshall’s, they have great shoes at very cheap prices. I have no other defense, although, I never knew we had that many trailer parks.


  18. Josh M says:

    Palm Beach, FL is 303.

  19. d0gma says:

    Ok, I used Dickinson, TX. And the 20 mile radius for Olive Garden and Marshalls, but not Walmarts, otherwise it’s 12.

    1 Marshalls = 10
    2 Olive Gardens = 20
    3 Walmarts = 30
    844 Trailer parks (I think the formula for finding trailer parks may be flawed there, the town isn’t big enough for that many trailer parks) 844
    That’s 904. Pop (as of 2007) 30,853/1,000,000 = .030853

    Grand total of…..29,300.

  20. Ragina Tucker says:

    12 MARSHALS X10 = 120
    4 OLIEV GARDANS X 10 = 40
    20 WALMARTS X 10 = 20
    2 DEVRY X 50 = 10
    1466 TRALEER PARKS X 1 = 1466
    1926/22!!!11111! OMG LOL ITS 875 BIATCH!11!11 OMG WTF LOL

  21. City of Dayton Ohio says:

    Dayton Ohio


    Should be way higher.
    We’re currently working on trying to get more than one Devry.

    Mayor of Dayton
    Rhine McLin

    Please see my picture here: http://lh6.ggpht.com/_4HWeiRfLm7s/RxTDbOKB7OI/AAAAAAAADE4/-6lQ7Tk7Yto/IMG_7927.jpg

    Please head the shape of the frames of my glasses.

    That is all.

  22. Anonymous says:

    Flawed formula. There is no way that San Diego is more white trash than one of the worst cities in America, Detroit. I would rather live south of the border in Tijuana than Detroit.

  23. Anonymous says:

    Houston, TX = 380 (A little white trash.)

    Marshalls: 18
    Olive Garden: 4
    Walmart: 20
    Devry: 5
    Trailer Parks: 166

    Population: 2.2 million

  24. Anonymous says:

    i live just outside of detroit. detroit is a dump, but it’s not “white trash.” “white” really isn’t a word that would describe detroit.

    now, shit. new baltimore, MI: 40,108.0351

    white fucking trash.

  25. Anonymous says:

    ahahah – i can’t believe po-town is below 100. total shocker!

  26. Anonymous says:

    Pretty fun,

    Though in truly rural areas where white trash is king, trailer parks are in pretty short supply, as they are in favor of plunking down a trailer on an acre of land. also, 1 point doesn’t seem high enough.

    Also some weight should be added to Wal-Mart supercenters for their prominence in rural areas. In addition to DeVry, you should include other technical trade schools like ECPI, etc…

    I live in Roanoke VA which is absolutely RIFE with white trash, and ours came out at 221, possibly only because it has listed only 3 trailer parks. I know of at least 2 more that google maps can’t find, but the area is encircled by trailers on plots of land. I also propose a Big Lots and Fashion Bug penalty.

  27. justin says:
    I see you’re familiar with my birthplace.
  28. Anonymous says:

    I came up with 198 for Sacramento, Ca. Now we all know this is the biggest little hick town in America. I say your formula is faulty.

  29. Jay T. says:

    San Diego would have been higher if you had added “nearby meth labs” to the equation.

  30. SamanthaLeigh says:

    Orange Park, FL

    Olive Gardens- 1
    Wal-Marts- 3
    Marshalls- 2
    Trtailer Parks- 96
    Devry- 1


    20,280/1,000,000 = .02
    206/.02 =10,300!!!!

    omg… I’m almost in awe……Goddamn DeVry ruins everything.

  31. Anonymous says:

    Washington, DC

    White Trash Total of 16.9

    1 Marshalls

    Population of 591,833

  32. Anonymous says:

    But if you use that criteria the number of Wal-marts drops to zero and the number of trailer parks drops by at least 100.

  33. Anonymous says:


    Olive Garden: 4 x 10 = 40
    Walmarts (<25 miles): 15x 10 = 150
    Marshall’s: 5 x 10 = 50
    Trailer Parks: 103×1 = 103
    Devy: 1×50 = 50
    population (311,000)

    = 393/.311 = 1264

  34. Anonymous says:

    Oops, number of Wal-Marts drops to one, not zero (but it’s just barely within city limits);).

  35. d0gma says:

    Ok, I can’t do math either. 77053, Houston, would be 829. I was counting Devry as 100 points each.

  36. The Reformed Broker says:

    one of the funniest things ever published on interwebs

    thank you holy taco!

  37. Anonymous-i aint anonymous says:

    marshalls 1
    trailer parks 4
    population .06125

    West Allis WI—228

  38. DENVER FTW!! says:

    I didn’t think Denver was White Trash. Its actually pretty White Classy.

    Mexican trash on the other hand is very high. How do you measure that?

  39. Arthur Dimmesdale says:

    Atlanta’s score . . . a semi-respectable 628. I probably undercalculated the number of trailer parks/manufactured home lots.

  40. Dom says:

    I am confused also, shouldn’t trailer parks be worth more than 1 point?

    I’m pretty sure that would be like asking if you’re town is ghetto and only give government funded apartments 1 point. That defines ghetto. Just as trailer parks define white trash.

  41. Anonymous says:

    Anchorage, Alaska

    Olive gardens: 0 = 0
    Walmart: 2 = 20
    Marshals:0 = 0
    trailer parks: 5 = 5
    DeVry:0 = 0

    25/.28= 89

  42. Anonymous says:

    My home town has 350 people, and half of them are white trash, though we have none of anything listed.
    I don’t get it…

  43. Anonymous says:

    My home town of Jamestown, New York scores a 4,400 – all without a single olive garden, marshalls, or Devry campus. Classy.

  44. Anonymous says:

    Jacksonville, NC (74,618)

    Olive Gardens: 1 = 10
    Walmarts: 2 = 20
    Marshalls: 1 = 10
    Trailer Parks: 79 = 79
    Devry Tech: 0 = 0
    Total: 119
    Population: 74,618 —–
    Divide by: .074

    FINAL COUNT = 1608

    I did not need this quiz to let me know that my hometown is white trash.

  45. Vance says:

    Sergio is wrong about there not being any white trash in Europe. One has to measure differently. In Europe they are called hooligans and they assemble in drunken herds at footballs matches. East London may not have a Walmart, but it is white trash heaven. Oh, and Greece.

  46. Stoan says:

    Nashville, TN – 634

    I made an Excel Calculator since I’m lazy.


  47. Trailerfun and Adventures says:

    hahaha. trailers! http://trailerfun.blogspot.com

  48. Trashy says:

    Want to know more about Trash and Garbage Weird Facts

  49. SouthPhillyFoLife says:

    I can’t believe no one has done Philadelphia yet:

    Olive Gardens (the OG as we call it) 4
    Wal-Mart 4
    Devry 2
    Trailer Parks 0 (that’s a shame)
    Population 1.5 million (approx)

    That comes to a deceivingly low 310

    I think south Jersey would win with their bridge and tunnel hair! (but don’t have the time)

  50. Jenna says:

    Boone, NC (home to Appalachian State)

    Olive Gardens: 0×10 = 0
    Walmarts: 1×10 = 10
    Marshall’s: 0×10 = 0
    Trailer parks: 31×1 = 31
    Devry Institutes: 0×50 = 0

    Total: 41

    Population: 14,717

    41/0.014717= 2785.89


  51. Mark Richards says:

    I’m not really sure what Devry has to do with white trach- plenty of places with crazy high scores have no Devry’s- and plenty of places with them (like NYC) aren’t white trash at all. It doesn’t seem to relate.

    Someone else mentioned Nascar tracks- now that seems like a perfect addition…

  52. Anonymous says:

    hahaha ok well Mark Richards is obvioulsy a Devry graduate with spelling such as “trach”

  53. Anonymous says:

    If you live in the South try this little experiment.

    Go to a Walmart while the Super Bowl is being played. It’ll be humming. Especially considering that it’s a Sunday night. Then go back to that SAME Walmart a week or two later while the Daytona 500 is being run. They might as well be closed! There’ll be virtually NO customers there! That is THE time to go to Walmart. Make your list in advance & stock up, so that you don’t have to go again until next year.

  54. Anonymous says:

    Branson, Missouri: A whopping 8000!

  55. Anonymous says:

    Just euro-trash, which really isn’t much better. Enjoy all the track suits!

  56. Anonymous says:

    if you have to ask….

  57. Anonymous says:

    White Trash Formula
    City Name: New Orleans, Louisiana
    # of Olive Gardens: 1 X 10 = 10
    # of Walmarts: 14 X 10 = 140
    # of Marshalls: 2 X 10 = 20
    # of Trailer Parks: 60 x 1 + 60
    # of Devry Tech Schools: 0 = 0
    TOTAL 230

    Population Estimate (2008) = 470,000

    230/.470 = 489

    Now that population number is low because it only counts the people in New Orleans and not the Greater New Orleans Area (the surrounding parishes) whereas if we limited the points to just NOLA then it becomes 170.

    In other words, New Orleans itself isn’t white trash BUT the region surrounding it is — which anyone who’s been to the Northshore or where the new developments are can attest to how generic they’re making it.

  58. Bill says:

    Okay, I did my home of Boston and ended up with the following:

    Marshals: 9 x 10 = 90
    Olive Garden: 1 x 10 = 10
    Walmart: 0 x 10 = 0
    DeVry: 0 x 50 = 0 (not one in the entire state of Mass.)
    Trailer parks: 4 x 1 = 4

    Total: 104
    Metro population: 4.5 million

    Total: 104/4.5 = 23.111

    I did everything within a 10 mile radius, my basis being that that is what is easily accessible by public transit (not counting the commuter rail which extends to Rhode Island). I used 15 miles for the trailer park search as Google maps did not have a 10 mile option.

    If I extend to 15 miles the number jumps up to 54.222, but I don’t think that really works because that starts to include places like Lynn and Stoughton that I’m pretty sure are not included in the metro area population figures.

  59. Anonymous says:

    Hampton Roads, VA


  60. Miami Born & Raised says:

    Now State College, my current town of residence (WE ARE! PENN STATE!).

    Olive Gardens: 1
    Walmarts: 2
    Marshalls: 0
    Trailer Parks: 1
    Devrys: 0

    Total 31
    Population: 38,420
    Score: 806. Not exactly surprised.
    Score (On football Saturdays): 281. Our stadium becomes the 3rd largest city in Pennsylvania when Penn State plays. For some reason, I think that might make State College MORE white trash.

  61. Anonymous says:

    Austin Texas
    Olive Gardens = 4
    Wal-Mart = 11
    Marshall’s = 1
    Trailer Park = 7
    DeVry = 1

    Population 759K

  62. Anonymous says:

    who is the most famous person from cape girardeau: rush limbaugh. coincidence?

  63. Bryan L. says:

    Well, my town, Ansted WV has a population of less than 1500, and we have 4 trailer parks. This gives us a score of 2666. To give it another 1 up, our Rite Aid pharmacy sells hard liquor by the fifth.

  64. Anonymous says:

    NO wait Nascar should be 500 pts easy, so that’s 996/2=498!

    Much better,.

  65. Miami Born & Raised says:

    My hometown, Miami.

    Olive Gardens: 1
    Walmarts: 10
    Marshalls: 17
    Trailer Parks: 10
    Devrys: 2

    Total: 390
    Popluation: 2,387,170

    Score: 163.4

    You should probably know I’m pretty shitty at Math (can’t be bothered to pay attention to numbers, details. Thanks, ADD.)Luckily, my city gets saved by the high number of Hispanics (myself formely included).

  66. Scoop says:

    I thought Las Vegas would have scored higher:

    Marshalls: 6
    Olive Garden: Only 4
    Mall-Warts: 20
    DeVry: 1 (in Henderson)
    Trailer Parks: A mere 40

    Base score: 390

    Population: 1.84 million (including Henderson)

    White trash score: a paltry 212

    No t-shirt for me!

  67. Anonymous says:

    Im confused, can someone tell me why Olive Garden has anything to do with white trash?

  68. Sergio says:

    Oslo, Norway

    Olive Garden restaurants: 0
    Walmarts: 0
    Marshall’s Clothing Stores: 0
    Trailer Parks: 0
    Devry Technical Schools: 0

    = 0

    The Greater Oslo area has a population around 1 million,
    but it doesn’t matter, as the White Trash Score is 0!

    Same goes for London, England and Moscow, Russia, and every other European city. This means there is no white trash in Europe. I’m glad I live here!

  69. Anonymous says:

    Fayetteville, AR is 815. Jesus!

  70. Anonymous says:

    Winston-Salem, NC:

    Walmarts: 4
    Olive Gardens: 1
    Marshalls: 1
    Devry: 0
    Trailer Parks: 81

    Population: 215,341


    Score: 654

  71. Anonymous says:

    The Metro population for Boston goes much further than 15 miles. To get 4.5 million you’re going as far out as Nashua NH.

  72. Anonymous says:

    Kansas City metro area

    5 Olive Gardens @ 10 pts each = 50
    5 Marshall’s @ 10 pts each = 50
    20 Wal-Marts @ 10 pts each = 200
    96 trailer parks @ 1 pt each = 96
    2 Devry Institutes @ 50 pts each = 100

    BUT…I have a new and very important category you guys left out!!

    # of Nascar speedways: _1_ x 200 pts = 200

    TOTAL = 696 / 2 (as in 2 million people in the entire metro) = 348

    Suck it Detroit!

  73. Anonymous says:

    That’s quite funny.

    Hardly makes up for the fact that you’re apparently another gutless, undercover racist with an chip on his shoulder, but I guess that’s your problem.

  74. Professor Racistman says:

    “you never hear anybody say ‘black trash’”

    Thats because you don’t take Tautology 101

  75. Clarence says:

    My city just scored 13,333.

  76. comedyicon.com says:

    you forgot to mention ‘Inhabited by DOG THE BOUNTY HUNTER’,which by definition puts Denver,CO-his birthplace,and Honolulu,HI(current residence) at the top of the list…knocking these other sad excuses down a couple of pegs.
    Duane Lee “DOG” Chapman,and his brood are certainly the white trashiest of all humankind and deserve some kind of title belt(which they would proudly display on the mantle below their Velvet coyote painting and their nativity scene which is covered in orange cheeto dust.)

  77. ben roethlisberger says:

    yeah, and the women wont rat u out if u bust their head off of the sink when they’re done blowing u! In the burgh, thats foreplay!

  78. Anonymous Me says:

    Moultrie, GA 1857

    Worse than I thought.

  79. Anonymous says:

    pinhead, phoenix is the #10 largest city by land area in the country. get your facts straight you moron.


    phoenix is a piss hole.

  80. bob berbowski says:

    Moron. You need to check your figures on Phoenix.

    The population of the phoenix metro area is waaaaay more than 1.5 million.

    Phoenix is the 5th largest city in the USA by population, and the largest in the USA by land mass.

  81. Anonymous says:

    those blacks have it so easy!

  82. Anonymous says:

    Because they’re called something else?

  83. Anonymous says:

    why is it the only time in this country you can use racism acceptably is when its about white people?

    you never hear anybody say ‘black trash’

  84. Anonymous says:

    Whoa whoa whoa, just because I enjoy named brand merchandise at low low prices doesn’t mean I’m white trash!

  85. Anonymous says:

    You clearly haven’t actually been to the midwest. Plenty of white trash trailer parks, just not as many as in the south (which is more than abundant with white trash)

  86. Anonymous says:

    Nope, you sufficiently reinforced the fact that Phoenix is white trash – no apology needed

  87. JJ from Phoenix says:

    Look, if you are going to count Walmarts, olive gardens etc. in the Phoenix Suburbs such as Tempe, Glendale, Scottsdale, Mesa, then you can’t just use Phoenix population to divide by. The total population of the phoenix metro area is closer to 3.5 million. so really the phoenix metro areas wt number is actually 264.

    Now Phoenix its self has:
    2 marshalls – 20 points
    3 olive gardens – 30 points
    11 walmarts – 110 points
    2 devrys – 100 points
    110 or so trailer parks – 110 points
    total 370 points / 1.5 = 246 = Phoenix Proper.
    a lot less than the 616 you incorrectly posted.

    You owe phoenix an apology. Plus it wouldn’t be as white trash as it is already if WT from all over the country would quit moving here because it’s so nice. Thank you.

  88. Dom says:

    Holy Taco, you guys know how to piss people off.

    1. Start with white trash.

    2. Then relate that to peoples hometowns.

    3. Add numbers into the mix.

    4. Sit back and watch motherfuckers bitch!

    Good stuff.

  89. Theo11 says:

    Fargo, North Dakota

    #of Olive Garden Restaurants 1×10= 10
    #of Wal-Marts 1×10= 10
    #of Marshall’s Clothing 0×10= 0
    #of Trailer Parks 127×1= 127
    #of Devry Schools 0×10= 0

    Population/1 million 90,599/1,000,000 = .09
    Total/Ans 147/.09= 1633.3

    I suppose I do eat a lot of casseroles. I never considered it a bad thing. Also, I agree with the others, Olive Garden is a fancy restaurant, and Marshall’s has super expensive clothes. Fleet-Farm has much better deals.

  90. Anonymous says:

    How can you have trailer parks in Fargo? Isn’t it 20 below every day in winter? I saw the movie, you know. A trailer in winter would be like sleeping outside. Which is I guess what makes it white trash.

    I think that real true white trash is a Southern thing. And I have been around it plenty.

  91. Anonymous says:

    Warrenton, Tx
    Dont got hardly nothing in town but wal-mart is right down the road about 15 miles.

    #of Olive Garden Restaurants 0×10= 0
    #of Wal-Marts 1×10= 10
    #of Marshall’s Clothing 0×10= 0
    #of Trailer Parks 0×1= 0
    #of Devry Schools 0×10= 0

    Population/1 million 60/1,000,000 = 6×10^-5
    Total/Ans 11/6×10^-5 = 183,333!

  92. Anonymous says:

    Farmville, Virginia = 11,980!!!

  93. portland,me says:

    portland maine


    we rule

  94. Anonymous says:


  95. Eeek!! says:

    I don’t understand…. my town is very small, has no Olive Gardens, Walmarts, ect… but we’re about the most white trash place I know. Calumet, MI? With all the Chicano/Black impersonating people that’re paler than Justin’s scrotum.

  96. Anonymous says:

    Chicago = 84
    Seems like the only problem with using this formula for a big urban area is that some parts might be significantly more trashy than others. I think also the score is a bit low due to the unions not allowing any Walmarts in the city (there is only 1). Also, no Olive Gardens in the city, but plenty in the surrounding suburbs.

  97. Woody says:

    Kansas City, KS = 2891

  98. Sam says:

    I don’t think this works for small towns…I live in a pretty white trashy place but since we have no Olive Garden, Walmart, Devry, or Marshalls, our score is way too low. Sad we don’t get the recognition we deserve.

  99. Anonymous says:

    i think the formula’s off, louisville only comes out to 476, way more white trash then that here. olive garden is an upscale restaurant in kentucky.

  100. Dongbags says:

    I am now living in Denver and the earlier post was correct. We are very Buenos Dias around here. However, I hail from a lovely place known to those who have never been as the Gem City–Quincy, IL 62301.

    #of Olive Garden Restaurants 0×10= 0
    #of Wal-Marts 2×10= 20
    #of Marshall’s Clothing 0×10= 0
    #of Trailer Parks 75×1= 75
    #of Devry Schools 0×10= 0

    Population/1 million 40,366/1,000,000 = .040366
    Total/Ans 95/.040366= 2353.466

    And after the Olive Garden is complete we will be pushing 2600pts. Go fck yourselves San Diego.

  101. Chilly Chill says:

    Because the playing field isn’t equal

  102. Anonymous says:

    Indianapolis, Indiana

    Olive Gardens: 4 = 40
    Walmarts: 8 = 80
    Marshalls: 5 = 50
    Trailer Parks: = 184
    Devry Tech: 1 = 50

    Total: = 404
    Population: 795,458

    Final = 507 PTS

    Funny story, A couple years ago on my side of town a large Trailer park was demolished and residents displaced in order to build a 2nd super walmart. The original walmart now sits empty just next to it with grass growing in the parking lot and empty strip malls to the left and right.

  103. drunkenmonk says:

    Chattanooga, TN
    olive garden = 2
    walmart = 12
    marshalls = 2
    trailer parks = 47
    devry = 0
    total = 207
    population 496,000 metro
    chattanooga = 417

    something is amiss… my hometown…
    olive garden = 0
    walmart = 1
    marshalls = 0
    trailer parks = 5
    devry = 0
    population = 5681
    ooltewah = 3000 ha

  104. NothingToxic says:

    Marin County California = 68.75