When can I eat the food? Why is no one eating it yet, it’s out there, it’s been laid out, and no one’s touching it. Why the f*&k would you put food out on a table, and then not serve it? It’s buffet style, that means I can help myself, right? I’ll just head towards the food, and pick something up and eat it, and it’ll be fine. Okay, here we go, going to just grab a piece of bread and a slice of salami and- OW! WHO THE F&*K PINCHED ME?! My Girlfriend?
What the? Don’t mouth “don’t embarrass me?” It’s not like I pulled my pants down and jacked off on to the fruit platter, I just want to eat a slice of fuggin salami god dammit. Screw that shit, I’m not going to be bossed around by my girlfriend. I’ll show her, I’m going to raise my eyebrows at her, and make a slightly angry face. There, now she knows who’s f-in boss. Jesus Christ, there’s so many old people here.
When I’m old, and my wife is old, am I going to want to f*&k my wife? Cause right now, old people are fuggin gross. Oh, here comes the girl who’s graduating. Do we really have to hug hello? I’ve met you three times, one of which you got wasted and told everyone you liked the taste of semen. Ha, that was hilarious. I’m going to remind my girlfriend about that time. Whoa, DON’T F*&KING PINCH ME!
Courtney Love & Muppet Sexual Assault
Playboy’s Big Dance March Madness Bracket Challenge
The worst part of these goddamn parties is meeting the other asshole boyfriends for the first time who have to be there too, and then your girlfriend and his girlfriend go off together to say hi to someone and you two are stuck there and everytime he makes small talk I want to tell him to just shut up and look at his beer… I’d rather be punched in the nuts by mike tyson than be in that situation, for christ sake just go out to dinner when you graduate bitch
“So, you have a problem with me grabbing a bite to eat before the rest of your family you’re trying soooo hard to impress? Why don’t we tell them about the load I blew all over your face last night after you finally let me put it in your ass after those 6 Smirnoff Bitchwaters you chugged last night. Oh by the way, you puked all over my leg last night, so I used your childhood transitional item to wipe it off. Kudos”
You’re only lying to yourself man.
I HAVE FUCKED THAT GIRL IN THE PICTURE!!! I AM 100% DEADLY SERIOUS.
I fucked the old lady too. But I’m most proud of fucking that girl.
Jesus, this site gets spammed like none else.
I blame Pauls.
dude i was just at a grad party last week and there were these group of girls that had to have been models or something because they were pretentious, dressed in gucci etc, and were gorgeous. out of my group of friends i was the only one who had the balls to talk to one of them and long story short we knocked boots 4 hours later. and today i was surfing the web and i was right that the girls were models and the blond i hooked up with is a decent actor too.
http://tinyurl.com/588taz
I went to a party like this once. It was with my ex-girlfriend and she was trying to hook me up with her friend who was having the party. Boring party, boring girl(the situation was just weird from the getgo). My ex and I left early and had some awesome sex! I know that’s why she wanted to hook me up with her friend. She just wanted to make hump with me again.
Stop using “fuggin”. You are completely castrating the beauty of the word “FUCK” which is the “CK” at the end of it. Saying “fuggin” sounds like you just had sinus surgery.
Who hasn’t fucked her?
This was funny! I’m sure most of the jackholes on here, never having had girlfriends, can’t relate to it, but this was well written and damn funny.
My girlfriend took me to a birthday party like that a month ago.
All the girls were talking and hanging out, while all the boyfriends who didn’t know each other were sitting around by themselves and looking at their watches every two minutes. At least we were at California Pizza Kitchen, so the food didn’t suck.
The only guy that had a good time there was this creepy 45 year old dude who was taking pictures of all the girls there. He totally had that “hey can I be your uncle for $30″ vibe going on.
Ever go to a party and get stinking drunk only to have the pics posted by the wife of a good buddy post them on Facefuckingbook the next day? Fuck her and fuck my buddy for allowing it, I fucking hate humans in general, at least my dog doesn’t know how to operate facebook. I hope the inventors die of fucking rotten colon bowel cancer or something worse.:
Why waste your time at her party and join these Hot MILFs now…
eh this wasn’t true for my experience with being at my girlfriends friends grad party at all
and some of the lines in it were pretty iffy
not very well-written
dizi izle
dizi izle canli dizi full dizi izle dizi seyret
Are you sure you hooked up with the blond? Are you sure it wasn’t no one?
“Blond” with no E? “Actor”? What you’ve got yourself there is a DUDE.
coooo
electronic cigarette
Have a fun at
Granny young sex flavours
lol
maybe its the weed talking,
but that was hilarious
That’s was fuckin funny.
the pinching! so true!
Well said!!!!
yeah, gf’s friends/family grad parties are true waste of time
the worst is being introduced to relatives of the graduate, give me a fucking blunt so i can just be brain dead for the rest of the ‘event’
I once went to a barbecue held by some nutjob religious relatives and they prayed for 15 minutes while the (DELICIOUS!) food just sat there and got cold. I hadn’t eaten all day and was starving.
This post reminds me of that time and you can bet that right now I AM FUCKING FURIOUS.
http://casualencounters.com/blog/
But first, take her home and fuck that frown off her face. Then dump her grumpy ass . . .
Yeah, hook up with girl who likes seamen… don’t marry her, but hook up with her.
dump this girl immediately. it will only get worse. yes, i realize she is ficticious.
Or just 69 her. Then the frown’s a smile.
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LOL, so true, so true.
eh this wasn’t true for my experience with being at my girlfriends friends grad party at all
and some of the lines in it were pretty iffy
not very well-written