Oh my goodness gracious! Aren’t I just the early bird today? Well, if I keep going at this zippy pace, I’m going to be early for work today, and I certainly don’t want that. The next thing I know, they’ll be expecting me to arrive 10 minutes early, and it’s all downhill from there. I guess I’ll just use this extra time to admire the wonderful architecture of this boring street that I drive down every day. At 32 miles per hour, it’s impossible to appreciate the lovely buildings otside, but at 17 miles perhour, I can gawk at every one of these non-descript, unimpressive buildings for as long as I want. Oh, look at that one! It’s got green trim! Oh, and that one’s a yoga studio! How fascinating! Oooh! Non-descript office buildings! Life is so much more exciting at 17mph!
That reminds me, I had a wacky thought the other day: do you have to exercise the blinkers on a car? You probably do. That’s why the blinkers never work on those old cars you find in the junkyard. My drive to work is pretty much a straight shot, and I hardly use my blinkers at all to begin with. I should probably use this morning drive time to give them a little bit of exercise, so that they don’t get bored and leave me like my ex-husband Stanley did. Here’s a little work out for you, right blinker. How does that feel? Refreshing? Invigorating? Oh, the lights changed. Time to drive again! You keep working out while I—-well, that’s strange…
I think they must have changed the shade of green on this traffic light. It used to be more of a Kelly green, but now it looks like it’s more toward the end of the green spectrum. Let’s see, I think I have a color swatch somewhere in here, from when I repainted the laundry room to make the cats happy. Where is that swatch? Is it in the glove compartment? No, it’s not in the glove compartment. Is it in the center console? No, it’s not in here either. Where could that darned swatch be? Maybe it’s in the seatback pocket. I know it’s in here somewhere, I just know it.
Oh, golly gosh! Sounds like someone’s having a carhorn party behind me! Well, don’t get too cranky back there Mr. Man! We’re not in any hurry this morning. We’re all running early, remember? I’ll get moving just as soon as I find this color swatch and determine exactly what shade of green the lights have turned to, because I’m going to have to call the city later and tell them that–oh, here’s my swatch! Right in the built-in sunglasses holder where I left it! Now let’s see here—oh, balderdash! The light’s turned back to red again. Wouldn’t you know! Well, that’s okay. It’ll be green again soon, and I’ll have plenty of time to compare it to my swatches. In the meantime, I’m gonna blast some Goo Goo Dolls!