Do I get the trophy now, or do I have to listen to Jerry Buss’s son give another speech that sounded like it was written by that retarded kid from the Make-A-Wish foundation that I gave my e-mail address to because reporters were around.I won a championship on my OWN, little Darren, so no, I won’t “make baskets to bring happy time” for you anymore, bitch.
What the?Why they bringing up Bill Russell to give me my trophy?I don’t give a shit about Bill Russell, so he won a bunch of championships, big deal.He played against a bunch a 5’10 white dudes.
That’d be like if I challenged all the employees of a Wal-mart in Boise, Idaho, to a game.The last time I saw that many white dudes running around in tiny shorts, I accidentally walked in to Sasha Vujacic’s hotel room when we were playing Golden State.
I hope they don’t think I’m gonna share a moment with Bill Russell, like I got shit to say to him.Nope, I’m gonna grab that trophy from him, like he was an 18 year old girl handing me the key to her hotel room.Yoinks, got it.I probably should force a smile or something here.Ugh, I hate this part.Alright, right corner of the mouth, lift up.Left corner, lift up.There, smile.
Hmm, people might say that’s not enough.Fine, I’ll hand the trophy to my kid.Whoa, just cause you’re my kid don’t mean you can just grab the trophy, that’s Kobe’s f**king trophy.Great, now the wife’s looking at me like she wants to hold it.Apparently a six million dollar ring isn’t enough to keep you happy.You think you can do whatever you want because one of your titties is the size of Lamar Odom’s head, but you’re wrong.Kobe won a championship all by himself!I can do what I want.I’m gonna f*&k up Stuart Scott’s other eye!Kobe’s above the law!
Arguably the dullest award ceremony of any sport, and the NBA tried to make it all telegenic like we cared... instead of changing channels since the punkass Magic shat their pants in the finals.. and yeah, Kobe totally gave Bill Russell the "give me that shit old man" face when he got it.
Ah holy taco, did yall really have to rip on Stuart Scott? He's a cool sports announcer. I mean, ripping Kobe is fine, but damn holytaco, that was messed up.
IF I WAS KOBE BRYANT....I would be chasing so many hot, skinny white girls that look like Jessica Biel.
I wish I won an NBA championship, so that everytime I enter through a door, all the hot white chicks would be like, "I want him to tear my vagina a new a-hole!"
But if it's worth anything, I'll be willing to trade it all to troll on holy taco.
You have to respect Kobe Bryant, his leadership and determination literally carried the Lakers to a Championship. Not to mention his Nike ad campaigns are awesome, check them out here: http://www.precioustimeny.com/blog/?p=361
Damn ... this is almost as awesome as when I raped that bitch in Colorado. Man, I need to do that shit again. Ain't nobody gonna do nuthin about it. I'm fuckin RICH, y'all!
your a faggot. you wish you were kobe bryant. he was found not guilty by a jury of his peers build a bridge and get the fuck over it for fucks sake! talk about beating a dead horse!
While I agree that the rape charge was trumped up, he was never acquitted of the charge. He never went to trial. He just paid the bitch the money she wanted and suddenly she had no interest in testifying against him. So quit acting like he was found "not guilty" and call it what it was: he paid the girl to make the problem go away.
Love him. loooooool.
Would you like to make friends with people from other country or place?
Here's a community __ B l a c k W h i t e C o n n e c t--c om ___
Then you can get help and suggestions from all over the world.
While you may find your true love or friendship there.
Ah holy taco, did yall really have to rip on Stuart Scott? He's a cool sports announcer. I mean, ripping Kobe is fine, but damn holytaco, that was messed up.
(31 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
June 15th, 2009 at 02:57 pm
wheres birdman?
June 15th, 2009 at 04:13 pm
Shooting up.
June 15th, 2009 at 03:33 pm
This article should be called "when holytaco tries"
June 15th, 2009 at 04:04 pm
your comment should be titled 'when bitches cry'
June 15th, 2009 at 04:09 pm
sorry for hurting your feelings..
June 15th, 2009 at 03:39 pm
Who is Kobe Bryant? What is this "NBA" you speak of?
June 15th, 2009 at 03:56 pm
Arguably the dullest award ceremony of any sport, and the NBA tried to make it all telegenic like we cared... instead of changing channels since the punkass Magic shat their pants in the finals.. and yeah, Kobe totally gave Bill Russell the "give me that shit old man" face when he got it.
June 15th, 2009 at 04:50 pm
yeah it was a joke, stayed up until 5 am to watch that game to the end. fucking waste of time
June 15th, 2009 at 05:26 pm
BLACK MAMBA IS KING!!!!!!
June 15th, 2009 at 06:24 pm
money and fame....all for rapin' a skanky ass white girl.
June 15th, 2009 at 07:03 pm
dude that bitch was a skank. she had sex with 7 dudes before kobe. get your facts straight dickface.
June 16th, 2009 at 08:19 am
i bet MJ raped that chick before Kobe did...sorry Black Mamba, your in a distant second behind His Rapeness..er..Airness
June 16th, 2009 at 06:35 pm
MJ? Maybe. Wilt Chamberlain? Definitely.
June 15th, 2009 at 06:46 pm
Ah holy taco, did yall really have to rip on Stuart Scott? He's a cool sports announcer. I mean, ripping Kobe is fine, but damn holytaco, that was messed up.
June 15th, 2009 at 08:00 pm
That was cheap, you're right. Sort of a shitty joke as well. Actually, not sort of. 'Twas a shitty joke.
June 15th, 2009 at 08:53 pm
No, fuck that. Stuart Scott deserves it. He's a douchetard asshole.
June 15th, 2009 at 06:46 pm
IF I WAS KOBE BRYANT....I would be chasing so many hot, skinny white girls that look like Jessica Biel.
I wish I won an NBA championship, so that everytime I enter through a door, all the hot white chicks would be like, "I want him to tear my vagina a new a-hole!"
But if it's worth anything, I'll be willing to trade it all to troll on holy taco.
June 15th, 2009 at 08:08 pm
You have to respect Kobe Bryant, his leadership and determination literally carried the Lakers to a Championship. Not to mention his Nike ad campaigns are awesome, check them out here: http://www.precioustimeny.com/blog/?p=361
June 15th, 2009 at 08:54 pm
Damn ... this is almost as awesome as when I raped that bitch in Colorado. Man, I need to do that shit again. Ain't nobody gonna do nuthin about it. I'm fuckin RICH, y'all!
June 15th, 2009 at 10:28 pm
your a faggot. you wish you were kobe bryant. he was found not guilty by a jury of his peers build a bridge and get the fuck over it for fucks sake! talk about beating a dead horse!
June 15th, 2009 at 11:41 pm
ya oj was "not guilty" too.
June 16th, 2009 at 07:45 am
While I agree that the rape charge was trumped up, he was never acquitted of the charge. He never went to trial. He just paid the bitch the money she wanted and suddenly she had no interest in testifying against him. So quit acting like he was found "not guilty" and call it what it was: he paid the girl to make the problem go away.
June 16th, 2009 at 10:19 am
i like bridges
June 16th, 2009 at 03:34 pm
You don't pay a hoe to fuck you. You pay her to leave, hence the acquittal ... Good luck with the bridge.
June 15th, 2009 at 09:46 pm
check out WWW.SQUIBCRIB.COM - funny stuff
June 15th, 2009 at 10:33 pm
Love him. loooooool.
Would you like to make friends with people from other country or place?
Here's a community __ B l a c k W h i t e C o n n e c t--c om ___
Then you can get help and suggestions from all over the world.
While you may find your true love or friendship there.
June 16th, 2009 at 06:26 am
Wait,
The NBA had their Finals?
June 17th, 2009 at 06:35 am
CLASSIC!
June 16th, 2009 at 08:24 am
Kobe needs to retire now, and start an AIDS foundation for retired NBA fucktards
June 16th, 2009 at 10:55 am
I like how everyone defends Kobe. LOL he raped her get over it lol.
June 24th, 2009 at 05:09 am
Ah holy taco, did yall really have to rip on Stuart Scott? He's a cool sports announcer. I mean, ripping Kobe is fine, but damn holytaco, that was messed up.
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