I remember in sex-ed in high school they had some social worker come to our class to talk about teenage pregnancy and he was like super intense and all he kept saying was “babies…having babies,” and then he’d really solemnly shake his head. I don’t think that guy ever came to Jamie Lynn Spears’s classroom, or else she and her fiance would have remembered that before putting a condom-less penis inside her vagina. Now, the baby has come. People.com reports:
There is a new baby in the Spears clan! Jamie Lynn Spears and her fiancé Casey Aldridge welcomed a baby girl Thursday morning.
PEOPLE confirms exclusively that the baby was named Maddie Briann.
Wwow, tthatts a rreally cooll name. Apparently the entire family was there, including Britney. I sort of wonder if when this baby was being born it was thinking “Okay, here we go, time to start life. I can see the light, I’m moving towards it, things are going to be good. There’s the doctor, there’s the nurse, there’s a….blond woman eating a pastrami sandwich?”
Now, I’m fairly white trash. I have family photos where everyone is wearing sweats. Therefore, i can confidently say that the Spears family is pretty much as white trash as it gets. They look like they’re part of that weird oil town in “There Will Be Blood.” So, I’m not buying that this birth went down all civilized, with doctors and stuff there. I think it probably looked something like this:
Courtney Love & Muppet Sexual Assault
Playboy’s Big Dance March Madness Bracket Challenge
just what this world needs…another whitetrash bastard kid. 20 bux says jamie-lynn’s a grandmother before she turns 30!!!
I’d like to give her another….
Pedo bear approves!
well you just lost 20 big ones because she’ll be about 32 or 33…and she’ll be 35 when Maddie Briann is 19
Britney is actually taking care of the baby until Jamie Lynn have recovered. Brit has already started Maddie on a regiment of Red Bull, cheetos and cigarette smoke.
She will be knocked up again in less then a year. There’s no doubt about that. Maybe even with in 4 months from now we will hear of the 2nd one on it’s way.