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LARPers: A Nerdy Photo Collection

LARPers are a fascinating breed. In their attempt to take their Dungeon and Dragon fantasy world out of their dreams and into the real world, they somehow transformed their regular nerdiness into some super, mind-blowingly powerful nerdiness. Here’s proof.
(For those of you who don’t know, LARPing is "Live Action Role Playing." Think of it as Civil War reenactors…but with wizards and ogres and clerics and shit.)
Look, sometimes you have to spend so much time painting your shield, that you don’t always have time to make sure your helmet fits correctly. There are only so many hours in the warrior’s day. But a one-eyed LARPer is better than no LARPer at all.
Did you know that you just need an 80′s punk wig, a shirt from your mom’s "African phase" and some pseudo Zubaz to play LARP with you medieval pals? (You definitely DON’T need to drop 45 pounds.)
"After I smote thee with thine vaunted staff, I shall devour thee with thine gnashing jowels. Possibly with a Gordita."
Is this a LARPer or a singer in a Norweigian death metal band? (It doesn’t matter.)

If you threw a motherboard at this crew, there’s a good chance that whoever caught it could program the shit out of it.
How many times do you think this LARP had to pause because the guy in the big box fell over and he needed three of his pals to come and help him get back on his feet? I’m guessing the answer is "the entire LARP."
I wonder if she’s dating him because he has a huge sword.
I bet the guy on the left feels pretty stupid that he didn’t dress up like a badass battle kitty.
"Hey, remember that time I totally LARPed you earlier? Man, that was awesome."
"Oh, yeah, you were a LARPing machine out there today."
"Thanks, man. I was was pretty unLARPable."
"That doesn’t make any sense."
"I know."
I can’t tell if this is either a sunface or a vagina face…or a sun being eaten by a vagina…or a vagina eating another vagina. All I do know is this screams "homemade nerd."
"Hmmmm….should I get double pepperoni and extra sausage…or should I get double sausage and extra pepperoni and a side of cheesy bread? Decisions, decisions."
You’d think that if he went through all the trouble to make a realistic Roman-era battle suit that he would at least take four minutes to shave his crappy 80s hipster mustache.
One thing the history books don’t teach you is that sweatpants and high tops were quite fashionable during the middle ages. (Merlin loved to rock the Jordan -MVIII’s.)
What kind of nerd wears…oh wait, this one’s hot. WTF?
Before a big LARP, some warriors like to meditate and free their mind of any thoughts of Domino’s Meat Lovers Pizza, anime, Yoo Hoo or anything else that might distract them on the battlefield.
Despite engaging in warfare in the middle ages with primitive weapons and rugged, homemade garb, LARPers always love to pose for the 20th century camera.
"I know I know, I left it in my mom’s minivan. Yeah. I didn’t know she’d need it, but she had to pick up my sister from the doctor. She said she’d drop it by on her way home. Can we just pretend I’ve got it on and start already?"
LARPing is hard work.  As you can see most LARPers sweat when they act out their midieval fantasies. But to be fair, they also sweat when they eat, sleep, breathe, and have bowel movements.

42 Responses to "LARPers: A Nerdy Photo Collection"

  1. Я тоже иногда такое замечал, но как-то раньше не придавал этому значения.

  2. General Chicken says:

    nice…that took some balls right there.

    i commend you.

  3. TheDuder says:

    The Elf chick IS hot, but that don’t mean she ain’t batsh!t crazy.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Haha… good shit

  5. Anonymous says:

    Pretty sure that’s a dude.

  6. frankie says:


  7. Wow… I’m a LARPer in many ways. What you’re seeing here are Amtgarders most likely. I also play Vampire the Masquerade. ;)

  8. TangoSmoker says:

    Ba Ha!!! Cuntface kills me. Not sure if thats a guy or a girl though.
    The one two pics down looks like a big gold plated penis.

  9. nodoczerodownteaser says:

    is the person on the far right of the first picture a fantasy muskrat or something? who would choose that?

  10. nodoczerodownteaser says:


  11. some anonymous user says:

    Want to see the real nerdy LARP pics? Then browse the foto galery at http://larper.ning.com .

  12. Dr. says:

    Magic Missile that S H I T, son!

  13. jlindros says:

    Haha! Great comment. I was thinking that the whole time i was reading this.

  14. Gini says:

    I think it is a female. French Tips? Not many men get a manicure before a LARPing session…

  15. TheDuder says:

    Thank you, Anonymous, I will put down my beer and consider the infinate beyond now.

    My mind is opening up to the fact that the funny smelling girls you’ve been sucking face with at least once a session are desperate and you look like a fish in a barrel. Thanks for not using the words “sex” and “girlfriend”.

  16. Anonymous says:

    you make fun of the 20th century camera, but what about the guy with the fucking grenade launcher and his buddies with machine guns? I think they missed the second half of the memo on what was supposed to be happening at this event

  17. GRiZZ says:

    You take 100 damage, and I take none.

    I’m a level 11 WIZARDDDDD

  18. Derisis says:

    Wow, I used to LARP Vampire the Masquerade waaay back in the day. I haven’t thought of that old Malkavian in a looong time. hee hee good times.

  19. Anonymous says:

    here here buddy ice, id back door that furry titted elf all night long

  20. Lil_Bobby says:

    My god, I’ve … I’ve never seen anything like it. After seeing this I’ll pray to Baby Jesus every day thanking him for making me an inbred redneck willing to do my cousin in her toothless face than walk around outside like these happy, happy hippos.

    Get it, happy … nudge, nudge, wink, wink … HAPPY?!? Ha ha ha!

    Except for TittyFur, I’d take that ‘un back up into the hills with me.

  21. Pan the Goat God says:

    There are more virgins at a LARP event than at a Catholic pre-school.

  22. Im horny now. says:

    the fat cat chick could by my pussy queen who ate my potion of rejuvination helping me hide my “sword” in the “secret hole”
    god dammit, now i gatta scroll back up and jack off.

  23. Donkey Breath says:

    Holy crap!….haven’t laughed so hard in forever….the posts on the picture were flippin’ beyond hysterical funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  24. bugeyemonster says:

    More pictures of the Hawt LARPer elf girl please.

  25. Awesome.

    LOL I’ve got tears in my eyes.

  26. Buzzard says:

    That is goddamn hilarious for sure. Anyone notice in the pic above “Battle Cats” there’s a ninja on the left? Sneaky fucking ninjas…

  27. FLARPA says:

    LARP-ERS RULE!!!! I am starting FLARPA (The Future Live Action Role Players of America). New members will get a free condom (just one, not like your actually going have a use for it).

    Disclaimer: this is an attempt to get a ride on the hottie elf train.

    Footnote: The ninja was placed there to distract you from the “warrior” (notice the bulging muscle’s) who’s costume consist of a large sword, boots, and gym shorts.

  28. Anonymous says:

    Contemplating nerd is MY BROTHER!! Oh, I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time. Thank you… (oh, and he probably IS pondering pizza toppings but he’s more of an everything pizza kinda guy, hold the anchovies)

    I have got to send this link out to our MSN family page. ROFLMAO.

    You’ve made my month!! -L in CT

  29. Anonymous says:

    I had seen world war II Re-enactors before but never anything like this.. I guess if it makes you happy.. do it.. oh yeah, the elf chic with the boobs is hot.

  30. Занимательно написано. А это все на основе личного опыта?Позвольте поинтересоваться :)

  31. Welshbloke says:

    ah, yes, why attempt to understand something when it’s far easier to heap derrision upon it and rely on tired, cliche stereotypes?

  32. Anonymous says:

    You haven’t seen a real larp have you. Hot girls everywhere. I end up making out with a pretty girl at least once every larp session I attend.

    Lucky me, but too bad the rest of you loosers aren’t open minded enough to broaded your horizons with anything but football and beer.

  33. Buddy Ice says:

    I take great pride in the fact that I have no fucking idea it is that this article is about.

    That chick had sweet tits though.

  34. Pratik says:

    Seriously… this was the LAST gallery where I’d expect to see a nice rack. Unless it was some fat dude with boobs like Ted Kennedy.

  35. Seanchez says:

    Careful – The hot one with tits isn’t real, although I’d still be the first to run a train on her. Every single one of these fuckwits has seen “Weird Science” – one of them figured out with his Wang computer how to make a girl, the shitty thing is her vag tastes like spam.

  36. Blake says:

    Buddy Ice knows exactly what this article is about.

  37. Nick says:

    Just thought I would point out that the vagina-face costume is trying to be Sauron’s eye from Lord of the Rings. She did a pretty crappy job of it though, cause my penis gets confused when I look at it. Why do I feel like such a douche bag for posting this?

  38. Jaymz says:

    He he… The guy on the right in the third last picture looks like Shrek!

  39. Anonymous says:

    Almost like an SCA event…

  40. frankie says:

    So this is what the holy taco staff does during the weekend???

  41. frankie says:

    That kinda hot blonde elf chick has to be some fat balk loser’s Russian mail order bride. The only possible explaination.