I’m really glad that I’m not famous, because if I was, I’d have to field questions from reporters like “Your father just released a statement saying he’s quote, ‘God damned tired of people saying big titties are over-rated,’ adding “they’re accurately rated says me,’ end quote. How do you respond to that?” But since I’m not famous, he just says shit like that to my friends, which is embarrassing, but not globally embarrassing, like Lindsay Lohan’s dad. People.com reports:
Lindsay Lohan is lashing out at her often-estranged dad, Michael, who has been openly critical of her relationship with Samantha Ronson.
“He has become a public embarrassment and a bully , to my family, my co-workers, my friends and a girl that means the world to me,” said Lindsay.
Lindsay Lohan is releasing a statement calling someone a public embarrassment? That’s like my dog releasing a statement saying that I lick my asshole too much.
The whole Lohan family are all trying to milk the shit out of Lindsay’s career, so I don’t know why she’s any more upset at her crazy ass dad than she is at her mom, who is to white trash what Lawrence Taylor was to the linebacker position; redefining it to the extent that you won’t be able to mention the term without mentioning the significance of their contributions.
I’m hoping Michael Lohan steps up the embarrassment level and shows up to her house at Christmas, like this: