If you’re you’re reading this right now while you’re at work at your job that you think is really shitty, I recommend closing your browser before you read what I’m about to show you. People.com reports:
Miley Cyrus has signed a seven-figure book deal with Disney Book Group, the teen star’s publisher announced Tuesday.
The book will focus on the 15-year-old’s road to fame, from growing up in Tennessee to navigating the spotlight as an international star.
So, not only is a 15 year-old going to write a book about her life, someone is going to pay her millions of dollars to do so. I blame Jose Canseco for lowering the bar here. There’s no way someone who’s lived 15 years has enough to write a biography. Unless she starts at like year one. Which would bring about passages such as this one:
“I remembering it being dark, then suddenly there was a light and I felt really cold on the top of my head. Then I realized I was coming out of my mom’s vagina. I was really excited to start my life out of the uterus but also sad that I was going to miss all the small bacteria and protein strands that I had become such good friends with.”
Anyway, I found an advanced copy of the book. Here’s the cover: